Hey HHVTT 🌙 🦉 Confused:

* Hip Hop Vocal Trance Techno

I am familiar with HH, was quite a fan of Emenem’s “I said I’m sorry mamma, I never meant to hurt you”- which touched on my childhood.

I’m guessing Emenem is too old for your taste now. I don’t even know what VT or techno is, but I’m curious 🤔

Switching to the 🖥, will write a bit later.

🎶 🎵 Anita

Good morning 🙂 Confused:

Feeling anger doesn’t feel good to me. I wonder if it feels good to other people. Curious, I asked you know who.

Copilot: “Yes — anger can feel good to some people, and this is not unusual.

Why anger can feel good- Research shows that anger can activate the brain’s reward system, especially the nucleus accumbens, which is involved in motivation and pleasure. When someone gets angry, the brain can release dopamine, the same chemical involved in reward and anticipation. This can create a brief sense of power, energy, or relief.

Some people experience anger as “good” because:

* It replaces feelings like helplessness or shame with a sense of control.

* It provides a rush or surge of energy that feels rewarding.

* It can feel empowering, especially when calling out injustice or protecting oneself.

This doesn’t mean anger is always healthy — just that the body sometimes interprets it as useful or energizing.

But the relief is temporary- Even though anger can feel good in the moment, research shows that venting anger actually increases anger, not decreases it. So, the short-term “rush” can lead to long-term emotional strain.”

The above explains why my mother was often angry at me: it made her feel (temporarily) good, as in powerful, in control.

Because I am at the computer, I asked Copilot another question.

Copilot: 🎶 Modern Greek songs people in their 30s usually know:

Μη Με Ξυπνάς — Melisses, Έλα — Κωνσταντίνος Αργυρός, Θυμάμαι — Melisses, Μισή Καρδιά — Κωνσταντίνος Αργυρός
, Αν Μ’ Αγαπάς — Νίκος Οικονομόπουλος, Κόκκινα Γυαλιά — Πυξ Λαξ, Όλα Μοιάζουν Καλοκαίρι — Melisses, Σ’ Έχω Ξεπεράσει — Πάνος Κιάμος, Το Παλιό Μου Παλτό — Γιάννης Χαρούλης, Μικρή Μου Αγάπη — Μιχάλης Χατζηγιάννης

Do you know all of these songs?

🎶 Anita

Hi again, Starlight 🌟

Thank you for explaining more. It makes sense that you’d want to slow down and rest, especially when you’re feeling run down. Taking care of yourself comes first, always.

I hear what you’re saying about stories and how much the tone, context, and the storyteller’s sensitivity matter. You’re right — a good storyteller pays attention to boundaries, and a good listener also protects their own wellbeing. It sounds like you’re seeing more clearly now how those biblical stories felt overwhelming without enough context, and how easy it is to forget self‑care in the middle of it.

I appreciate you sharing your thoughts with me. There’s no pressure to look at resources or to continue the conversation unless it feels right for you. Resting and giving yourself some gentleness sounds like a wise choice.

Warmly, Anita 🌿

Going to bed at 9:30 pm, Sat, here (W.USA); Sun 7:30 am in Greece & in Israel. Good night/ morning, Confused.

What I was trying to say above, Confused, is that I really admire the strength of the boy- Confused who in the midst of ongoing abuse and the great emotional pain and turmoil that it caused you, you wisely (instinctively, not a matter of a self-aware choosing), shut down his feelings.

It makes perfect sense that you did. It was self- protective.

Fast forward, she has been deceased for quite some time, but the emotional shutdown has become an internal habit, just the way it’s been for so long.

Again, I see why you needed INTENSE feelings to cut through the thick crust of emotional shutdown/ anhedonia.

Yet, intense feelings cannot be sustained.

So, is there another way to cut through the anhedonia?

Not in the fast, dramatic, intense way of the past, but slowly- as in one little step at a time: see Copilot’s # 1 in two posts ago, less than 11 hours ago.

🌿 🌟 Anita