Dear n20:

Thank you for coming back and sharing this update!

On June 30, 2024, you shared that you struggled with anxiety your entire life, which had significantly worsened over the past year, leading to your first experience with depression and a diagnosis of OCD. Despite feeling overwhelmed by the persistent nature of your mental health issues, you held onto hope for improvement and sought support from others with similar experiences while working on self-compassion and living in the moment.

Fast forward almost 8 months, and it’s lovely to see your photos and stories of world travel. You look wonderful, and your positive energy truly shines through!

In “Lesson Learned,” you recounted your harrowing journey of seeking validation and help for your worsening health issues. You advocated for yourself and underwent extensive medical testing, which eventually revealed lesions on your brain indicative of multiple sclerosis (MS). Further testing results were negative for MS, and you did not share a definitive diagnosis regarding the cause of the lesions, as far as I can tell.

You shared your story to provide hope to others who might be struggling, emphasizing that it is possible to feel better and emerge stronger from immense suffering. You reflected on how accepting your emotions, including suicidal thoughts, helped you move through the pain. Now, you have new ambitions, including pursuing a PhD program and reconnecting with family. You expressed gratitude for the experience, despite its challenges, as it has profoundly changed your life and provided you with valuable insights. You now understand the significance of happiness and suffering and can look back at this time for strength in future hardships.

It’s inspiring, n20, to read how far you have come despite facing serious health issues affecting your brain. Your strength and resilience are truly admirable, and I’m so glad to read that you’re finally getting the help you need.

Your journey is a powerful reminder that there is hope, even in the most challenging times. It’s heartening to know that you’re proud of your progress, and it’s uplifting for others who might be going through similar struggles.

Your story will undoubtedly provide hope and encouragement to anyone reading it. Thank you for being brave enough to share your experience and for offering a beacon of hope to others.

Wishing you continued strength, healing, and positivity on your journey.

anita

Dear Peter:

I want to reply further when I am more focused Wed morning.

anita

Dear Peter:

I understand about the news these days being overwhelming and concerning. During these challenging times, it’s important to take care of yourself and find moments of peace amidst the chaos. Your well-being is important, and taking care of yourself will help you stay resilient.

anita

Dear Aj:

“I’ve been diagnosed with health ocd.. why is my brain now suddenly saying that everything I want is a woman now- when never in my life have I thought that?”- I understand that you’re feeling confused and distressed by these sudden thoughts. Given your diagnosis of OCD, it’s important to recognize that OCD causes intrusive thoughts that may be completely unrelated to your true desires and feelings.

In your case, the sudden intrusive thoughts about your sexual orientation is an example of how OCD manifests. These thoughts are likely a result of your brain’s tendency to latch onto uncertainties and create doubt, even when there’s no real basis for it. The fact that you’ve never had romantic or sexual interest in women and have always been attracted to men suggests that these thoughts are not reflective of your true desires but are rather a symptom of your OCD.

It’s important to seek support from a therapist who specializes in OCD. They can help you develop strategies to manage these intrusive thoughts and reduce the impact they have on your life.

“I watch male on male porn now… I also watch sensual straight porn now”- it might be helpful to take a break from watching any kind of porn because it may be reinforcing the intrusive thoughts and making it more difficult to find clarity.

If you’re seeking reassurance about your sexual orientation by watching porn to see if you feel attraction to men or women, it’s important to recognize that this approach is not helping you: despite watching porn, you are still feeling obsessed and unsure about your orientation.

Seeking reassurance in this way actually reinforces the cycle of intrusive thoughts and anxiety. Instead of trying to find answers through porn, I encourage you to consider seeking support from a therapist who specializes in OCD.

“I’m a harsh critic and want to be perfect.”- Being a harsh critic of oneself and striving for perfection are common traits associated with OCD. People with OCD often have high standards for themselves and feel an intense need to perform tasks perfectly. This can lead to excessive checking, repeating, or correcting behaviors to ensure that everything is done “just right.”

Individuals with OCD are often highly self-critical, constantly evaluating their actions and thoughts, feeling that they are never good enough and must always strive for improvement. To cope with the anxiety caused by intrusive thoughts and self-criticism, individuals with OCD engage in compulsive behaviors.

It’s important to recognize that these traits are part of the OCD cycle and can be addressed through therapy and self-compassion.

“I know from my other ocd obsession – my compulsion was searching online for anything relating to the topic. It would consume hours of my day on forums. I ask my sister for reassurance constantly because she has ocd and has gone through similar. I can’t get away from this mental loop.”-

– the mental loop and constant reassurance-seeking are really taking a toll on you. Recognizing these patterns is an important first step. It shows your awareness of the compulsions and how they are affecting your life. Again, seeking professional support from a therapist who specializes in OCD can help you break free from the mental loop.

It’s also important to be kind to yourself during this process. Recovery and managing OCD take time and effort, and it’s okay to reach out for help and support.

* It’s important to distinguish between seeking reassurance and seeking help. For someone with OCD, reassurance (such as “you are not gay”) might provide temporary relief but ultimately reinforces the cycle of intrusive thoughts and anxiety. On the other hand, seeking help from a professional, like a therapist who specializes in OCD, can provide you with real help.

Remember, you’re not alone in this journey. Actually, I suffered from OCD for many years but not anymore. Well, there is a tiny bit of a leftover but only a tiny bit.

I recommend that you read my reply to another member on Oct 10, 2024 right above on this page (page 17).

Wishing you strength and clarity as you navigate these challenges. If you ever need someone to talk to, I’m here for you.

anita

Dear Aj: I will read and reply in about 12 hours from now.

anita

Dear Chris:

Thank you for sharing more about your journey. I want to acknowledge that you have endured significant injustice and unnecessary difficulties imposed on you. It is deeply unfair that, despite your willingness to accept the consequences of a past mistake, and despite your commendable service to our country, you have faced continuous hurdles that have made rebuilding your life incredibly challenging.

Injustice is a common experience that many people face in various forms. It often brings about feelings of frustration, helplessness, and despair. It’s commendable that you have managed to navigate these challenges with resilience and determination. It’s inspiring to read that you don’t hold any animosity and that you’re focusing on maintaining your will and determination

While it’s unfortunate that you need to handle the notifications and reapplication process yourself, having your conviction vacated is still a significant step forward. It’s completely understandable though that the idea of retaking the boards and explaining your situation repeatedly can be very stressful. The stringent licensing requirements in California add another layer of difficulty to this process.

Given your decision to seek employment overseas, I hope you find a place where your credentials are valued and you feel welcomed and appreciated. It’s important to find an environment where you can thrive.

Also good to read that following the Tenants has brought you peace and allowed you to find acceptance in your journey. Embracing the idea of letting go and recognizing what you can and cannot control is indeed a profound and spiritually fulfilling path.

If you ever need someone to talk to or share your thoughts with, I’m here for you. Wishing you continued strength and success as you navigate this journey.

anita

Dear Chris:

Thank you for sharing your story. I’m truly sorry to hear about the challenges you’ve faced over the past decade. It’s incredibly difficult to navigate life with such a heavy burden, and I admire your resilience and determination to move forward.

It’s indeed wonderful news that your case is being overturned. While the stigma may still linger, this is a significant step towards reclaiming your life and finding new opportunities. Your positive outlook and focus on each new day are inspiring.

maybe you can find help in www. spl. org/ programs-and-services/ civics-and-social-services/ resources-for-the-formerly-incarcerated.

Wishing you all the best on your journey. If you ever need someone to talk to or share your thoughts with, I’m here for you.

anita

Dear Gabriel:

I’m glad to read that writing and reflecting on everything has been helpful for you. It’s understandable that not everything is resolved, but taking the time to express yourself and receive support is a significant step forward.

It’s great to hear that you’re aware of the connections between your childhood experiences and current struggles, and that you’ve been discussing these issues in therapy. Acknowledging and understanding the roots of our challenges is an important part of the healing process.

I’m really glad that you found comfort in the responses from others. It’s a testament to the power of sharing and connecting with others who care. If there’s anything else you need or want to talk about, please feel free to reach out.

anita