Tell me about this part of yourself that resurfaced with her, and make your answer as long as you can, will you?

All those extra letters show up, using my phone and I don’t know why, or how to stop it. Nor will I have access to a laptop for some time.

What I meant is, if I am making sense don’t confess to her, no need to say too much. Just say a bit of what is true to you and listen to her response as someone who is your equal, not someone for you to fix or save or people=please

Dear Confused:

Just be as honest and transparent as you can be with her, tell her like it is for you right now. You can tell her how you wish it’d be for you, for her. But then.. it is what it is.

Honesty and transparency is the greatest gift you can give.

Gear Confused:

Yes, not the right time for a Goals Discussion. Seems like she is not attuned to you, like she doesn’t know where you’re at.

What is her goal in having such a conversation?

Hey Dear Confused:

There is a saying: “Fake it till you make it”, meaning here, ACT lovingly towards yourself when you don’t feel it. Some say, you will.

💙🩵💗🩵💙 ..Love by action…

Anita

Dear Alessa:

One more day waiting for the meds- may the force continue to be with you, Alessa (a Star War saying).

Thank you for your empathy and support, you are the best, Alessa 🙏 🙏 🙏

“Or as easy as you can get with a kid running around.”- I know what you mean, or close to what you mean, having a beagle who wants to chew on anything it can chew (including the broken computer’s cable 😞).

🩵 🤍 🩵 Anita

Dear Robie:

I’m glad your stomach is almost 100% better!

We talked about so many things; we must have touched on Attachment Styles over the years.

What you described in regard to your girlfriend: “I always miss her right after we part, for a couple days but then I start having doubts and I keep telling myself I should break up with her because I don’t feel like we connect, I tell myself we don’t have things in common, I often thing of other women and think I might not be with the right person. When she writes to me, I feel irritated. I feel I don’t want to answer her. Almost as if I’m pissed off with her… At some point during the night when she told me she loved me I broke down. I told her I loved her too.. but I felt this guilt.. I felt like an impostor.”-

This fits perfectly with A disorganized attachment style—also called fearful‑avoidant attachment—is an insecure attachment pattern where a person feels both a strong desire for closeness and a strong fear of it. This creates internal conflict and inconsistent behavior in relationships, which means that you love her, you’re not an imposter; you’re just afraid.

You wrote about many things in your recent post, but maybe we should focus on one thing at a time, your attachment style perhaps?

Enjoy the little snow, Robi, and please take good care of yourself 🙂

🤍 Anita