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Thank you all so much! I really appreciate your advice, and will go forward feeling better about my decision
I feel I should break up, yet the thought deeply saddens me. I feel “but..but..what if its me. What if I just have toxic thoughts”..he does everything right emotionally…but these superficial thoughts always seem to come back up. I wish we could just date casually and openly until I feel sure, but he would not do this- as he is sure of me, but me not of him..
Thank you for your response. I realize that he may not be homosexual, but his feminine nature turns me off. Maybe it is my own insecurities. I wish that I could accept this about him. I like his heart, it feels warm, but the rest creates a conflict within me.
He would be :/
I know you feel lack of motivation to switch jobs, but if you can’t feel better about your job title, maybe you should find excitement(motivation) in thinking of a new job position. I once stayed in toxic roommate situation because I felt too crippled by being overwhelmed/depression. Eventually, I had no choice but to go. Looking back I realize though it felt nearly impossible to make a change, when the time came when I had no choice, I did make that change and things improved. My point is…I feel you would feel so much happier and lighter to pursue something new, with a title that you respect. It may be hard with no motivation, but just force yourself(if you do want to switch jobs) because in the end it will be worth it and I feel you may be motivated as you see that you can and are moving into a job position that you respect. The minute you start comparing yourself to others you need to stop and be compassionate to yourself. We all have been dealt different cards so to compare “progress” is unfair to you and your life story. Admire those you wish to be like, but try to keep it positive by constantly watching the pesky thoughts.
Bad: “He has so much more than me”
Good: “Wow, I like what he has. And I will be able to reach that level one day, for now I will take whatever step is next needed”
One step at a time?
No idea if that helped. Sending you light and love brotha 🙂
Also, I feel like with new friends its all about keeping a light vibe. So how can I approach them with a lighter fun mindset when I just feel like someone who needs healing?
I am blessed to have received each of these responses! Thank you. I do feel lonely, and honestly feel just having oneeee person would help. My only barrier with strangers is, I feel I have not much to offer in conversation anymore. Before I was like “OKay I feel lonely, but I am hopeful” Now, I am hopeful yet…I feel all of this time without true human connection has dampened my spirit. I just want answers, help. I had my experience with the wrong friends since being here so that has also dampened my spirt. I used to want friends for fun, now I just feel like I want to be cherished and taken care of as I recuperate. Thank you for your advice
You are definitely not alone. In fact, my eyes widened when I saw your title, because I thought I was alone. I feel every sentence of yours as if I wrote it myself.
Thank you. I really appreciate your replies
Thank you guys