trusttheflow – you wouldn’t by chance be living on an island that is populated with women, except there is only this one guy to choose from? In my uninformed, unprofessional and unqualified opinion, these sound like classic ‘Daddy’ issues.

Someone once said something to me that overtime I discovered to be very profound: “The way you perceive your past affects the way you feel about your past.” For example, if you think you had an unhappy childhood, then you will spend your adult life begrudging the fact that you had an unhappy childhood. As an adult, you make decisions based on how you feel about your past experiences.

If you change how you perceive your past, you can change how feel about your past, and you can change the pattern of decisions that you make. While I am not suggesting you block things out of your memory or make things up, it is possible to choose different things to focus on from your past. Otherwise, I fear the next boyfriend will turn out to be just as much of an a-hole as the last one.

You don’t get what you don’t ask for.

Nor will this be the last opportunity you have in life.

Try this on for size. After many years of having your house to yourself, you are faced with the difficult choice of opening up your home to your adult child who resents you and blames you for all of their failures. Rather than expressing any kind of gratitude, your adult child instead grudgingly complies with your requests and wishes because in their mind you owe this to them.