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How a Barbell Helped Me Confront the Harsh Voice Inside my Head

By in Blog

“The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing you will make one.” ~Elbert Hubbard

I’m breathing fast; my heart rate is off the scale. I close my eyes and try to fill my lungs with air. My pulse starts slowing down.

Still forty seconds of rest left, my timekeeper shows. A single drop of sweat is running down my back, tickling me. I open my eyes again and drink a sip of lukewarm water, then I get ready for the next series.

Six down, four to go. This is a good day, I

…

Then, One Day, It Clicks

By in Fun & Inspiring

Life Is About Evolving

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The Friend I Couldn’t Fix: A Story of Love, Loss and Letting Go

By in Blog, love & relationships

TRIGGER WARNING: This post deals with an account of domestic violence and may be triggering to some.

“You can’t heal the people you love. You can’t make choices for them. You can’t rescue them.” ~Unknown

Every story starts at the beginning. But how far back should I go? Birth?

I was born at Our Lady of Lourdes Hospital in Camden, New Jersey, in May of 1972…just after three in the morning.

No, wait. That’s not morning. It’s still dark outside.

Forgive me. That’s an inside joke.

You see, just a few years ago a friend of thirty years came to …

A Part of You Went with Them

By in Fun & Inspiring

3 Reasons Why Putting Yourself First Is Not Selfish

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“It’s not selfish to love yourself, take care of yourself, and to make your happiness a priority. It’s necessary.” ~Mandy Hale

I have to start off with how I define the different levels of self-care.

There is what I call surface-level self-care. This would be things like getting your nails done and taking a bubble bath. Very important stuff but not the type of self-care that’s going to help you make the changes on the inside that create change in your outside world.

Then we have deep-level self-care. I define this as working on things like setting …

For Everyone Who Thinks…

By in Fun & Inspiring

Reach In

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How to Move Through Your Fear by Retraining Your Brain

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When you’re in fight-or-flight mode, everything you do or don’t do teaches the brain something about the perceived threat. When you avoid or flee the situation, your brain experiences a wave of relief. The amygdala learns that avoiding that situation is how you stay safe from that threat.

This is exactly how you want the brain to respond if the threat is a grizzly bear. But what if the perceived threat is something less biologically adaptive, like a worry about being judged or teased?

Let’s say you’re invited to a party full of new people, and you have thoughts of …

I’m Moving into My Soft Era

By in Fun & Inspiring

Sending Love to Anyone Who Feels Misunderstood

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The Softest Form of Love

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Coming out of Survival Mode: How I Healed and Found Peace

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“I have come to believe that caring for myself is not self-indulgent. Caring for myself is an act of survival.” ~Audre Lorde

I can’t pinpoint the exact moment when I realized that I no longer needed to fight for my survival, but I do know that it came after several years of prayer, healing, and intensive work. It wasn’t an event, but rather the feeling of peace and calm that comes after a storm.

For me, the storm dissipated slowly. It was the kind of storm that kept swirling and re-emerging until I finally realized that it would take concentrated …

Relationship Tip

By in Fun & Inspiring

Imagine If We Measured Success By…

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Living Today Like Your Last: The Quest for Conscious Behavior

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“Today I shall behave as if this is the day I will be remembered.”

Once again, Dr. Seuss reminds us of the finite nature of life with a powerful punch in the face.

If I’m being honest, only about a third of my week am I kicking ass. And that doesn’t factor in the weeks when I feel like I’m as useless as a screen door on a submarine.

On days like this morning, when I’m doing dishes and get pissed off that my wife left a tea bag in her mug, again, it has clearly slipped my mind …

A Secret About Things You Love

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Quietly Listening

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Why I Didn’t Love Myself (and All the Suggestions That Didn’t Help)

By in Blog, love & relationships

“Remember, you have been criticizing yourself for years and it hasn’t worked. Try approving yourself and see what happens.” ~Louise Hay

There is a lot of hype around self-love these days. The media and marketing world often bombard us with messages insinuating that the key to self-love lies in consumerism. For a long time, I bought into this idea.

I would see an advertisement urging me to treat myself to a high-end face cream for a dose of self-care. Or a promotional email landing in my inbox might suggest that a calming lavender bubble bath was just what I needed …

You Can’t Control Other People

By in Fun & Inspiring