Thank you so much for your kind thoughts Anita.  I have been thinking about you too!  I hope you are well.

I am okay thanks.  I am doing just a little work ATM.  I have holiday pay owing to me so could afford to not rush in.

My life is very quiet.  My son has spoken to me several times since I was unwell with influenza and CIVID, and he really wants me to sell up here within the next few years and move back to Melbourne, somewhere within half an hours drive from him so he can check up on me and visit me much more often.  He has pointed out that I will need to be prepared to live in a very tiny space because of unbelievable realestate prices, but we bith agree that we could make anywhere nice with paint  floor coverings and furniture.  He wants me to start downsizing in readiness for this.

Part of me would like to do this.  I would love to see more of him, Nd once I retire, I’m not sure I would manage with the mortgage and maintenance here.  He said he thinks I would be able to find a place where I would be allowed to have one small dog.

It’s definitely something I will consider but shouldn’t have to do for another 5 years.

To be truthful, I suppose I’ve been feeling a bit sad sometimes even though I know I have so much to be grateful for.  Most of my life, I believed that I would enter into a happy relationship and share my life with somebody.

Realistically that just isn’t going to happen for me.  I will turn 63 this year.  In my way, I’m also happy – or perhaps relieved is more accurate to be on my own.

I think I rushed into most relationships I had, but I don’t know really if there are more reasons.  These days, I don’t actually like many men although I think there are a few who are okay.

I was happy with the result when I went to hairdresser – hoping to never dye my hair again.  Embracing the grey.  It’s mostly an ash blonde color now.  I put 2 pairs of beautiful colourful French earrings and a colourful silk scarf on layout which I will collect when my tax return comes. They are not that expensive but just about everybody is feeling the financial pinch here.  Fuel prices and food costs affect most ordinary people.

So glad our govt was voted out at the last election this year.  The new PM and ministers are so much better.  I’m not sure they can make a big difference about the financial situation at the moment  but they aren’t as heartless and self-serving as the last lot.

Doggies are doing well, but it appears the wheelchair is either lost or detained in customs so I’m going to start trying to chase that up today.  A quiet day for me today.  Yesterday I was up at 5.30am.  Went to work fir a few hours then looked at shops on the nearest city for a couple of hours.  I must have walked a few kilometres, and I was tired this morning.  I just did some housework and went to doctor for flu shot.  More paid work later in the week.

Keep safe and well.  XXXX

Thanks so much Anita. I have been reading news through social media on Trump.  What a narcisstic lunatic.  Our former PM was a huge fan of his which should say it all.

Yes, so happy to embrace the grey.  Good salons now do a blending process with grey, and I haven’t seen one photo where it doesn’t look good.  Very natural and quite modern.  A lot of women embracing the grey on social media are wearing their hair with a little length añd a soft curl usually with a curling wand.  So nice.  They put toners through it which are not harmful to hair and give it bit more of ash blonde and silver.  I definitely want to find a new lipstick I like a s a bit of color in the face makes a big difference.  Something not too harsh.  Some beauticiabs recommend a bright color, but on me, it’s not a good look.  I think I will just wear earrings and scarves with a bit of color.

I’ve been up with one of the dogs since about 3am.  He must have eaten something which has disagreed with him but is settled now.  I’ve been learning so much about dogs.  I’m going to try crating the oldest one who is very tiny as she goes for wanders through the night.  Any future dogs will be crated.  I have always spoilt pets whenbI have had them and broughtvthrm on my bed to comfort them.  I have had the malteseXshihtzu since he was 7 weeks old, and I think he is a little too closely bonded to me sometimes for his own good.  I’ve put a large old sheet on top of the bed as he is here with me and he had cried when I tried to get him to sleep in his day bed on the verandah.

The climate where my son lives is just a bit less extreme than here.  It’s hotter in summer and colder in winter.  I just am not sure what I will do yet.  I had been planning to sell my house and buy an apartment around 40 minutes from here.  There are a lot more facilities evenbthpugh it’s away from cities but my son wants me to be closer to him – within half an hours drive.  I admit that there are some things I miss about Melbourne.  Definitely more culture – lot of cinemas, music and art.  At times, it feels like so many people here are related or strongly socially connected – mostly in the workforce- and that’s often not a good thing.  Happens in the cities too but not so much as here.  Geoff was c a fifth generation farmer on the same farm and related to many people here and in surrounding towns.

Even though I’m glad I have no involvement with him anymore, part of me just hasn’t seemed to move on. In a way, it felt like my last chance at a relationship.

There is one ex of mine who I am still friends with who I have contact with every couple of months. He is the only one I want any contact with.  He would still like a relationship with me, but I have moved on from that.  He understands and says he wishes he had treated me better when we were together. At one time, I loved him very much, but it seems for me that when things go really too far, a light in the relationship switches off for me that doesn’t go back on.  We were seeing each other a couple of years.  He taught me a lot about horses. He is very good with them and other animals.  I still have a deep fondness for him as a friend.  At one time, he was an extremely handsome man – much better-looking than Geoff. I thinkbD will always be handsome and we will remain friends, but I don’t feel anything else for him anymore.  He lives on a farm near a beach and has been urging me to visit and stay with him And his adult daughter. They are aboutv5 hours away.  He has visited me several times here so maybe one day in the warmer weather, I will get there.

Imbgoingvto try get some sleep before U get up and bath this dog who hates baths.  Have a great day/evening.