Menu

I just randomly and suddenly fell out of love

Home→Forums→Relationships→I just randomly and suddenly fell out of love

New Reply
Viewing 4 posts - 556 through 559 (of 559 total)
1 2 3 … 36 37 38
  • Author
    Posts
  • January 31, 2026 at 8:21 am #454788
    Roberta
    Participant

    Dear Confused

    Sometimes our dreams are a way of processing the stuff we/life has been inputted into our minds often in the last 24hrs. therefore the more you think about her/situation the greater the chance a part of that will play out in your dream scape.
    Sometimes I dream that my ex-husband survived his boat sinking & I wake up happy other times I dream of his death & I wake up with the physical feeling of grief in my heart even though the accident was 25 years ago.
    Lucid dreaming & dream yoga are quite interesting topics to mull over.
    Kind regards & sweet dreams
    Roberta

    January 31, 2026 at 8:40 am #454789
    anita
    Participant

    Good morning, Confused 🙂

    In regard to “something is missing/not right”-

    You mentioned OCD and depression a few times, beginning in your very first post here (“I have started therapy with someone that specializes in ocd/depression”, Dec 19).

    It’s common that people with OCD (I was one) describe a strong internal tension like: ‘This isn’t complete.’ ‘This doesn’t feel right.’ ‘I need to fix this.’, ‘Something is off and I can’t relax.’

    The feeling itself — “something is missing/not right” — can appear in other emotional states, such as in anxiety and depression. But in OCD, the “not right” sensation is usually followed by a strong urge to fix it, such as checking, re-reading, re-thinking, mentally reviewing, seeking reassurance, trying to get the ‘perfect’ feeling.

    The person feels driven to do something until the internal tension goes down. It’s not just discomfort — it’s pressure.

    People with OCD often know nothing is actually wrong, but the feeling is so strong that it overrides logic. It feels like: ‘I know this makes no sense, but I can’t shake it.’, I need to fix this even though I know it’s irrational.’ That mismatch — insight + compulsion — is very characteristic of OCD.

    In OCD, the goal is to get the right feeling, the person often tries to reach a sense of ‘rightness’, ‘completion’, ‘certainty’. It’s not about solving a real problem — it’s about chasing an internal sensation.

    In other contexts, people don’t chase a ‘perfect feeling.’ They’re just distressed or confused. The feeling (“something is missing/not right”) doesn’t create compulsions.

    In one sentence, in OCD, the “something is missing/not right” feeling creates a compulsive drive to fix or complete something, even when the person knows it doesn’t make sense. In depression, it is about loss of emotional connection, of an internal spark, a feeling of aliveness and missing the old (not depressed) self.

    It’s an internal emptiness without a compulsion/ drive to fix or complete something. The feeling doesn’t demand a specific mental or physical action. It’s uncomfortable, distressing, maybe confusing, but not compulsive.

    Maybe this distinction is helpful, what do you think, Confused?

    🤍 Anita

    January 31, 2026 at 9:28 am #454790
    anita
    Participant

    Hey Confused:

    As I was looking at your Dec 19, 2025 posts, I came across “In my case too, the relationship with my mother was very chaotic, violence and arguing constantly, throwing some awkward affection here and there, then rinse and repeat. I can’t remember if I was dissociating when I was a kid, definitely trying to escape in imaginary worlds and games though”-

    And it occurred to me how much we do have in common. I too escaped into imaginary worlds, daydreaming for hours every day, every chance I got. There were no computers back then, so my escape was strictly mental, imaginary.

    A member here in the forums (Robi1992), only 3 years older than you, also grew up in a chaotic home with an unpredictable, sometimes violent mother, and like you, he escaped into imaginary worlds and games: (Robi, Feb 18, 2024: “When I was about 11, my parents bought my first computer. I was hooked from the early beginning. I would spend an entire day and sometimes night playing games and watching films. The internet has become my playground. Finally, there was a place where I could hide, explore and fit in… For many years, as an adult, I would spend my days in front of the computer.”

    Children who grow up in chaotic homes like you, me and Robi, need an escape. But we can’t escape the consequences of growing up in chaotic homes. Neither the suffering nor the consequences end just because we become adults and live away from home. As adults, we have to take on the difficult but necessary healing process if we want to put an end to the negative consequences of growing up in chaos.

    🤍 Anita

    January 31, 2026 at 9:31 am #454791
    anita
    Participant

    * edit: if we want to put an end to some of the negative consequences

  • Author
    Posts
Viewing 4 posts - 556 through 559 (of 559 total)
1 2 3 … 36 37 38

You must be logged in to reply to this topic. Please log in OR register.