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I just randomly and suddenly fell out of love

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  • #456108
    anita
    Participant

    Good ๐ŸŒ„ Confused:

    You pointed ๐Ÿ‘‰ to your overthinking many times.

    The psychiatrist you saw last prescribed an SSRI that is prescribed for overthinking (in greater dosage than what he prescribed according to the study I shared with you), and you’re thinking of seeing a therapist who specializes in OCD.

    These are 2 sources of hope for you?

    ๐Ÿ™๐Ÿคž Anita

    #456111
    Thomas168
    Participant

    I would think that what is needed now is to sort out what it is that you really want and stick to the plan. If you are over thinking stuff then maybe spend some time relaxing. Or meditation. Live in the moment without extra thought about the moment. A monk was walking around when he heard the sound of a tiger. Chased by the tiger, he ran to the edge of a small cliff and hung by a vine. Below he could see two more tigers looking up at him. On the vine, he saw a berry and he took the berry and ate it. He enjoyed the berry very much. So when there is so much stuff happening, sometimes you just got to enjoy the berry.

    #456113
    Confused
    Participant

    Hey guys

    Yes that’s correct anita, he did give me escitalopram that treats depression and could calm my overthinking down a bit. I am still on day 8. I returned from the new therapist appointment and tbh she seemed very nice, like she can understand what i’m telling her without much difficulty. I am hopeful i can help myself now yes ๐Ÿ™‚

    I like your reference thomas. I think i wanna stick to the plan of trying and letting my feelings come back instead of chasing intense infatuation all the time.

    #456115
    anita
    Participant

    Good afternoon, Confused:

    I am glad that the new therapist seems nice and understanding, and that you keep taking the medication (and are in regular contact with the psychiatrist, right?).

    I think that your plan or intent to “let” your feelings come back and no longer “chase” intense infatuation is healthy ๐Ÿ™‚

    #456120
    Confused
    Participant

    Hey anita

    She basically documented our first meeting which lasted abour an hour and a half (she charged me for one hour) and said that we still need a couple more times to form a better understanding of my situation and that we will set a goal each time i visit and we’ll try to accomplish it. She said she can’t tell if i have ocd/rocd yet, but i do have the 3 things that is usually the baseline for it to develop: guilt, fear, anxiety. I have an appointment with the psychiatrist in the next week because it’s gonna be the 14th day of the SSRI so he wants to see how im doing.
    I feel better and more hopeful for the future and i’ve had some good/warm feelings today. I hope it lasts ๐Ÿ™‚

    #456121
    anita
    Participant

    Hey ๐Ÿ‘‹ Confused:

    That you feel better and more hopeful for the future, and that you’ve had some good/ warm feelings today- that makes my evening!

    It’s okay if these feelings weaken, that’s okay. It’s natural for feelings to fluctuate. They’re like liquid. Nothing solid. That’s their nature.

    The “guilt, fear, anxiety” she identified- yes, I see that.

    You’re doing well, Confused- following up with her and with the psychiatrist.

    One day, one night, one hour at a time: be patient and open for good things/ healing things happening.

    ๐Ÿ‘‹โœจ๏ธ๐ŸŒ™ Anita

    #456132
    anita
    Participant

    Good morning, Confused:

    Today, March 1๏ธโƒฃ9๏ธโƒฃ, is the 3-month anniversary of you joining this thread (Dec 1๏ธโƒฃ9๏ธโƒฃ, 2025), filling 1๏ธโƒฃ9๏ธโƒฃ pages of posts (if you click on your screen name, you’ll see that)

    Interestingly, Ada, with whom you felt much in common, posted on March 1๏ธโƒฃ9๏ธโƒฃ, 20222

    Looking back at your first post, what strikes me most this morning is how trying to force feelings to return doesn’t work. You wrote back then about “โ€ฆconstant rumination for my feelingsโ€ฆโ€ โ†’ Rumination is a form of selfโ€‘pressure โ€” repeatedly checking, analyzing, and trying to force feelings to appear.

    Here’s what Copilot (AI) says on the topic: “When someone suddenly goes numb and panics about losing their feelings, they usually start trying to feel again. They check constantly, analyze everything, and pressure themselves to ‘love properly.’

    “But emotional systems donโ€™t respond well to pressure โ€” they tighten, freeze, or shut down even more. Thatโ€™s why forcing feelings never works.

    “What does help is when the person eventually… stops pushing so hard. The moment the inner pressure eases, the emotional system can breathe again. It relaxes. And in that softer space, feelings often begin to return naturally โ€” not because the person ‘tried harder,’ but because they finally stopped trying to control something that can only unfold on its own.

    ๐ŸŒฟ โœจ ๐Ÿค ๐Ÿ™‚ ๐ŸŒ™ ๐ŸŒฑ ๐Ÿ’ซ ๐ŸŒพ ๐ŸŒผ ๐ŸŒฌ๏ธ ๐Ÿ’› ๐ŸŒŸ ๐Ÿ•Š๏ธ ๐ŸŒธ ๐Ÿ”† ๐Ÿƒ ๐Ÿ’ญ ๐ŸŒป โ˜€๏ธ (19 emojis), Anita

    #456140
    Confused
    Participant

    Hey anita

    Yes exactly, my feelings/hopes all come and go and it’s weird, never had it happen to me again.

    Haha u are paying attention to details i would have never even seen. AI is right, i did panic and analyze/pressure/cried for months. Even the new therapist said that it’s like 2 forces fighting to come out on top (in my head) and that’s what makes me numb. But there are times in the day that i get feelings here and there now. Im trying to work on not pressuring myself but it’s hard. When i do tho, i mentally ‘reward’ myself and i get some “feelings” as a “treat”. Weird way i know haha

    #456141
    anita
    Participant

    Hey ๐Ÿ‘‹ Confused:

    Yes, I do pay attention to n I numbers and anniversaries.

    Is “not pressuring myself” same as relaxing?

    Feelings as a treat, what an interesting way to put it. I hope you reward yourself every day.

    The image of Confused thawing came to mind.

    ๐ŸงŠ ๐Ÿ’ง ๐Ÿ’ง Anita

    #456150
    Confused
    Participant

    I am very bad with numbers and anniversaries haha
    Hmm no it’s not the same, i can never really relax, never done that in my life ๐Ÿ™

    Yes i try to appreciate my feelings more now ๐Ÿ™‚

    Btw, can u recall any side effects on escitalopram? I’m on day 10 and i definitely have issues with dopamine. Will it get better?

    #456151
    anita
    Participant

    Good night (morning, for you), Confused:

    I never took Lexapro (the U.S. brand name of the SSRI you’re taking). It’s very popular here though, became a thing after my time. Side effects from my taking of SSRI (Zoloft, for most of the time)? Slept smoothly for 17 years. And IF I had good psychotherapy while taking it, it would have been just right.

    From my experience, it’s about both: a chemical intervention+ psychotherapy.

    Relaxing is so very.. important, Confused.. ๐Ÿง˜โ€โ™€๏ธ ๐ŸŒฟ๐ŸŒŠ ๐ŸŒ™ ๐Ÿƒ โ˜๏ธ ๐Ÿซง ๐Ÿ’ค Anita

    #456165
    Confused
    Participant

    Hey anita

    Its 10 days for me and i think i don’t want it anymore ๐Ÿ™ . It turns me into a zombie, no libido and zero dopamine, completely turned my reward system off. It did give me some clarity on the thoughts though, but i don’t like how it works on the other domains. Life without feelings just sucks!

    I think my issue requires psychotherapy rather than chemicals. Because before all this i had no issues with my feelings or any chemical imbalance ever. I wanna try and focus on that part only.

    #456166
    anita
    Participant

    Hey ๐Ÿ‘‹ Dear Confused:

    Well, if it gave you some clarity on your thoughts, that’s a positive.

    Yet, you get to decide on meds vs no meds.

    Personally, I think that psychotherapy- when it’s of quality- is way preferable to taking prescribed drugs (aka meds).

    But sometimes, in some contexts, meds save lives.

    I want the best for you, Confused.

    ๐Ÿ’Š’or-not. โœŒ๏ธ โ˜ฎ๏ธ Anita

    #456179
    Confused
    Participant

    Thank you anita ๐Ÿ™‚

    It helped as to make them not affect me as much, but other than that, nothing more.
    I believe the root of the problem is either burnout or my own thoughts blocking everything ๐Ÿ™

    Let’s see how it goes with the new therapist.

    #456180
    anita
    Participant

    You are welcome, Confused ๐Ÿ™‚

    I think that it can only help (and not at all hurt) if you relax as much as you can, be as patient as you can be and take your side in all this, meaning practice empathy for yourself, Empathy 4 Confused ๐Ÿซถ

    โœจ ๐ŸŒผ ๐Ÿ’ซ Anita

Viewing 15 posts - 856 through 870 (of 1,065 total)

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