Real Spirituality

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This topic has 80 replies, 6 voices, and was last updated 5 hours ago by Peter.

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December 8, 2025 at 11:13 am #452743

anita
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Thomas, I just had to tell you that your line “… Sorry, lost track of what I was saying. I just had a Senior moment. Where was I ? Never mind. Maybe I should erase this? Ah fudge. Sorry.” placed the first actual smile on my face this morning. You are positively hilarious at times, thank you 😊

Alessa: I too take things literally, and it was only yesterday- when I did my study on Advaita Vedanta- that I stopped being confused regarding this topic. So, when James said “you actually never did protect your child”, he meant (I hope!) that in the context of the eternal, Ultimate Truth, or Ultimate Reality (pure consciousness, where a body and mind do not exist), you can’t protect anyone.. because there’s no body or mind to protect.

But in the context of the temporary truth, or conventional reality of your every day life, of course you have protected your son every step of the way and will continue to do so best you can 😊

🤍 🩵 Anita

December 8, 2025 at 1:02 pm #452750

James123
Participant

Dear Alessa,

I mean, how many molecules in your child body properly work because of you? Some people have strong personality some people have weak personality after the traumas. Did you be able to build your child personality I the correct way?

Truth is it is not your child that feel safe, it is you that feel safe according to your programing conditions.

I

December 8, 2025 at 11:06 pm #452768

Alessa
Participant

Hi James

Well, I can’t control his DNA. I was lucky that he was born healthy. I can help his body to function. Ensure he has a good sleep routine, a healthy diet, make sure he stays hydrated, provide opportunities for exercise and try to keep his stress low. 🩵

He still gets sick once or twice a month. Fortunately, nothing too serious.

I’m trying to nurture the development of his personality. I’ve socialised him in baby classes, since he doesn’t have siblings. I’m teaching him about feelings and that others have different experiences. I taught him to be active because research shows that confidence comes from their physical ability for toddlers. Explaining the reasons why he can’t do something and validating his emotions as research suggests. I’m teaching him techniques for communicating and managing his emotions, encouraging autonomy. As research suggests teaching him values about hard work, effort and perseverance. Only time will tell the outcome. So far he is a sweet and friendly boy who isn’t afraid to let you know what he wants or doesn’t want. 🩵

I don’t agree that some have a weak personality and some have a strong one. There are so many factors involved. Upbringing, the nature of the trauma and severity. Neurodivergence and brain damage.

Yes, emotional contagion is a factor. But children also have their own emotions.

Regarding my feelings about nursery, yes it is related to my trauma. He isn’t worrying about any of this. He might have feelings about it once he is actually in nursery and separated from me. I will have to hide my feelings to try and help him be comfortable.

The truth of life is that in my country 1 in 6 children are sexually abused, mostly by people they know. He cannot live his life never trusting. So it is down to chance. 🩵

December 9, 2025 at 11:57 am #452787

James123
Participant

Dear Alessa,

Body and mind works together.

Sure. Do what is right for you to do.

However, By placing even more emphasis on your child, you could cause unnecessary worry or disrupt their balance.

In my opinion, the most important thing a child can receive is faith in God and the knowledge that everything comes from God (good and bad).

Once they understand these, they won’t need you emotionally. Whatever you do, provide them with a good education tailored to today’s circumstances, ensure their success, and build their confidence.

However, there will be a day when your child will fail, a day when their pride will be wounded, and a day when they will face death.

Therefore, the upbringing you provide is wonderful, but only up to a certain point; after that, it’s inadequate.

If you really want your child to stand strong in life, the most crucial point is to first teach them that there is a higher power, that this power can create or destroy without regardless of one’s expectations, and that people, money, and success come and go, therefore temporary, but that higher power is eternal. But not to rely on any priest or guru etc… rely directly on God itself.

With this way, not your but your child’s all worries will vanish. Many people dismiss the Truth and thinking that controlling or taking care on their hand. Yet, if you are ill, even smallest molecule in your body stop working, you can do none. Therefore, the core of controlling or taking caring your child doesn’t come from you.

People often only see the surface, not the deeper layers. Once you’ve seen enough of the deep, you won’t even understand how coordinated your hand moves are. You’ll see that even getting out of bed every day is a blessing. I think teaching your child these things, like visiting hospitals once a week, showing them to the poor, etc. Your child will soar with gratitude, and it will benefit not only themselves but all of humanity.

December 9, 2025 at 2:46 pm #452795

Peter
Participant

Student: Master, I see two paths before me. One speaks of truth, of patterns beyond my control.
The other speaks of care, of tending to what is fragile. They do not seem to meet.

Master: Do not divide the river. Its current is both the unseen source and the hand that cups water.
Truth is the flow, care is the drinking. Without one, the other is dry.

Student: But how can I know which is real? Is safety an illusion, or is it born of love?

Master: Safety is a shadow cast by the Beloved. Sometimes it appears as questioning, sometimes as nurturing.
Both are mirrors of the same sun. Do not cling to the shadow, step into the light.

Student: Then the two paths are one?

Master: Yes. The reed grows because the wind bends it, and because the gardener waters it.
Mystery and care are not rivals. They are two notes of the same song.

December 9, 2025 at 3:09 pm #452796

Peter
Participant

A woman approached the Buddha and confessed: “I don’t know how to practice, how to be spiritual.”
The Buddha asked gently: “Is there anyone you love?”
She replied: “Yes, my newborn child.”
The Buddha said: “Then start there. Care for him with mindfulness, with compassion. Let that love be your practice.”

Sometimes I have the sense that “spirituality” has become too rigid a word.

Spirituality is not a mountain to climb, nor a word to master. It is the quiet reflection that opens us to mystery, and the tender hand that pours love into the ordinary. Begin where your heart already leans, in the care you give, in the breath you notice, in the child’s laughter that needs no name. There, the Way is alive. There, the Beloved is already waiting.
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