I have officially made an honest woman of ‘B’. I can’t believe it @Sammy1 @Jay2023 @Rhaenys I did it!

Wow! I promised a full update before the honeymoon, here it is, this is one of my longer posts with details especially for you @Sammy1!

Who knew a little bit of paper held so much significance, when done with the right person.

I can really say I’m lucky AF to have won back ‘B’; to find my best friend and wifey in one is incredible.

My brother who was always going to be my best man gave a hilarious speech at my expense, but the pinnacle point was he said I don’t have to ask Danny did you make the right decision, he became a better man because of ‘B’ and he’s not looked back once since and I’m proud of you. This meant the world to me hearing that from someone I respect and admire so much after his own battle.

He’s right no other woman will ever or has ever understood me like B, her spirit and soul encompasses everything I have ever wanted and need. The best thing I ever did was drop my ego and have courage.

Feeling of being fully accepted by a woman who is a smart cookie and could have any man she wants is next to none, all my fantasies and dreams of what I wanted out of a relationship and thought was not possible have actually come to fruition with her by my side. I have really found my soulmate!

When I last posted, I was having the letter fiasco, to my relief ‘B’ chose not to read it. She still hasn’t but will cross that bridge when it comes! She said if I had wanted her to read it after, then she would respect that. I definitely do panic for no reason sometimes!

Don’t worry Sammy, I haven’t dismissed what you wrote. Now more than ever I realise if you’re not happy deep down it definitely will seep out. Our own happiness is the only way to achieve overall success. I don’t need the approval, I have B. That’s all I need. No more placating to be accepted.

The wedding day finally arrived and I expected to be nervous but it was more of a rush,  for the first time in my life I fully felt I was doing something right, the moment finally arrived, my wifey walked down the aisle and looked breathtakingly beautiful. She’s always has had a stunning figure but the way she looked in that dress, I’ll never forget! I felt this lump in my throat and I cried! She looked ethereal, I felt a mixture of intense desire to incredible pride. Our vows I will keep private but there were full of all the feels. We had in the end chosen to make this an intimate affair with very close family and few friends only and I’m so glad we had this day low-key as to me this was transformative and I actually was fully engaged and I’ll cherish it forever.

We had the weekend to ourselves before she returned back to her parents for the beginning of the cultural events and at this point I felt like a different man. The stand out point for the events was there was colour, lots of vibrancy and music. Painting faces with turmeric, funny traditions like milk and having your shoe stolen and paying for it to be returned, to a departing event with lots of tears this was overwhelming because I hate seeing ‘B’ upset. The events were jam packed and for the most part fun. Completely different to a traditional white wedding.

Seeing B happy and smiling made my heart feel fuzzy. Even though we had a lot of challenges with Covid. The events all went ahead and came together for her.

Oh and we both invited our exes to the cultural events in the end and it just reaffirmed I was with the right person. ‘B’s’ ex is bloody good looking and nice enough lad but I didn’t feel any jealousy as we have so much trust and communication. My ex best friend and ex both came too and because I was so full of pride nothing really mattered anymore. I didn’t feel at any moment it could have been her or any regrets. It was a complete new slate and I’m glad bygones are bygones. Her extended family on the other hand made a few jibes and couldn’t help but comment how ‘B’s’ ex being same race was a better choice for her. I didn’t let it affect me too much.

The evening we officially got married and had our civil was our wedding night, I told her I was taking her to somewhere special that only her and I will share. In more ways than one 😉

The last few weeks, ‘B’ had asked to spend with her family and no visiting until the big day, naturally this built the sexual tension even more, although I was not keen on this initially it worked out perfectly because it also gave me time to create my surprise wedding night at our new home .

First thing I did was install a doorbell camera to record her reaction when the time came. The old owners took all their furniture thankfully, so its a period property and stripped back it looks amazing with the high ceilings and chandeliers.

I decided to create a romantic trail based on what would be our new tradition, an ode to that date which stirred all the feelings of love for her, our engagement. I stole your idea @Sammy1 and made it very dreamy!

When we left the wedding venue, I blindfolded her and told her she must not peak and wait. She’s always great at gestures so I was stoked with what I had created for her. When we arrived I told her to wait and not remove the blindfold until I called her, she stood there in her wedding dress and I placed the first envelope which had a key and note inside ” This is the key to your happiness, use to unlock our new beginning..”

It was cute watching her reaction, she looked so confused at first! I prompted her and said I’m waiting for you inside our new home, and it finally clicked it was ours, she was astounded and stood there hand over mouth saying a few cursives and OMGs ahaha, best feeling ever.

When she opened the door I had lined the hallway with her favourite flowers in vases and a trail of clues. Each envelope gave a mini tour and clue on where to go next with a surprise present in each room. The kitchen I had left something naughty which told her to make her way upstairs.

When she arrived upstairs, I stood still and soaked her in, I didn’t want to forget how she looked at this moment. I had a record player playing “At Last”, and we slow danced to this, the rest of night was bloody magical. All I can say is B measured up in every single way and was worth all the struggle and wait. Sammy, Tim you were 100% right when there’s natural chemistry and a deep emotional connect,  the physical intimacy is bloody sublime with no inhibitions! I felt like I had died and gone to heaven. Bring on the honeymoon baby ahaha! Yes loves the house. Your boy did good! We christened it well too ahaha!

This thread steered me to taking the biggest risk of my life that led me to the most amazing reward. I am grateful beyond words can express.

I came on here looking for sympathy, I had been reduced to a fuckboy until I stumbled across this thread.

@Kkasxo homie your kindness and acceptance as a newbie allowed me to open up and spill my feelings which lead to me receiving so much insight and growth.

@Shelbyville your thread is the reason why I found such good advice, your protective nature, telling me to be kind to myself too touched me in a way I didn’t expect. You didn’t want me to get hurt chasing the impossible, but your concept of journeymate actually spurred me on and helped me overcome my biggest fears. It challenged me to not settle for less and take the easy route, so I fought for ‘B’.

@Tim1 your sage advice making me hold my physical urges and see if the emotional connect was strong allowed me to demonstrate loyalty, maturity and be better. I found my best friend and wifey all in ‘B’ and it made the the physical side more than I could have ever anticipated and this is one of the most important elements for me in a relationship, so I’m so glad you taught me that patience can be a virtue.

@Sammy1 what can I say you’ve been there since day 1 and you are a real one! You are a big part of my journey,  remaining fair but firm, which made me grow so much, the time ,insight you’ve given is the most amazing gift and I don’t think I will ever be able to repay you but I send you positive vibes and know when I look back I will appreciate and always value you for the incredible support and guidance you gave.

I’m here for you and see you like the cool sister I never had. I will always reply to you, whatever you need I will. I know you’re going to do well in life, you have a fighting spirit and whole heap of love. You go get them! If you want, B and I would love to extend our friendship to you beyond the virtual realm. That way I can repay you too.

@Jay2023 thanks for the heart to heart bro, it made me get therapy for the niggling issues and improve myself further. It has been a pleasure having another man on here since Tim and I really appreciated you as a sounding board and the support in the lead up to my wedding.

@Rhaenys thank you too for always offering encouragement!

I don’t want to disappear but I have a funny feeling my wifey will be occupying my time more than I originally anticipated. I’m going to take it all in whilst it’s on offer ahaha!

I will try to post but if it does become difficult. I wish you all the best in your journeys.

I think taking time to discover who I am, and finding someone who didn’t want to change me to ideal was key to this. Look for someone who you admire, respect so want to do better yourself but also makes you feel passion and wild desire. Don’t settle out of fear of being alone, don’t rush it or you’ll end up with a lacklustrous partnership and doing yourself injustice. Trust your timing and don’t fear love. Real love is wholesome AF!

I’m still learning, I still have some bad patterns but I know I’m winning. I found love in myself first. Thank you for everyone who contributed to getting me this far!