My heart is breaking for the seven Israeli soldiers—19, 20-year-olds—killed in Gaza most recently. They look so young, they could all be my grandchildren. One is laughing in the photo, so youthfully happy. Another looks so… innocent, almost childlike. One, I think, is Ethiopian-Israeli (when I left Israel in 1985, the Ethiopian immigration was very new; this boy wasn’t even born). Another might be the child of Russian immigrants, from that later wave of immigration.

Seeing their faces in the photos breaks my heart.

I feel… selfish for being so old, and yet alive—when they were cut off from life, not even a third of my age. I never knew any of them alive. And yet, I’d give my life for them if it meant they could live.

I just read that Iran arrested 700 Iranians they suspect of spying for Israel. I feel badly for them. I imagine they’re being tortured.

So much cruelty. So much torture and death.

Why… I wish not.

Anita

Journaling—something I do in my own threads, just typing out whatever comes to mind:

There is a gap between the desire to connect with other people and the reality of disconnect—or of connection that doesn’t last.

My biggest failure-to-connect was with my own mother. Oh, how hard I tried. And for how long.

I was young and, naturally, able to connect. She was too damaged, too sick to connect.

Fast forward: I find myself in a world full of damaged people who are unable to connect, at least not for long.

I was a troubled teenager and young adult. Sick. But with lots of healing work—or perhaps a better word: transformation work—I’m now able to connect. And I’m okay within myself. Gone is the torment-within.

But still—I’m aware that the world, in large parts, hasn’t healed. Hasn’t transformed.

The leader of the “free world” is a sick egomaniac.

It isn’t true, what he says (and what Netanyahu repeats), that the nuclear weapons capabilities of Iran have been destroyed. It’s simply not true. It’s just what both of them—Trump and Netanyahu—say to promote themselves, and no one else. At the expense of the truth.

Connecting. Trying to connect—in a broken world.

I keep going back to my mother, myself… because that’s where the origin lies: the desire to connect. The failure to connect. The shock. The betrayal of trust. The resulting decades-long anxiety and depression. (C-PTSD.)

Betrayal of Trust is a Global Epidemic, says I.

Acronym: BOTAGE.

Of course, I don’t trust the Iranian regime (their “Death to Israel!” “Death to America!” chants come to mind).

And I don’t trust Netanyahu. Nor do I trust Trump.

I don’t trust the Democratic Party candidates who ran against Trump either—nor all those career politicians who call themselves “public servants” while serving primarily themselves.

BOTAGE has been going on for too long: politicians bought by major corporations, including the multinational corporations that manufacture and sell weapons systems—which, by definition, profit from war and death.

“For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil.” — 1 Timothy 6:10

“Now the earth was corrupt in God’s sight and was full of violence.” — Genesis 6:11

“Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have.” — Hebrews 13:5

Those words were written nearly 3,000 years ago.

Fast forward: VOILÀ. Here we are, Surprise.. not.

I find comfort in just seeing all this as-is.

Anita

Dear Alessa:

Thank you for your message. I couldn’t have said it any better myself. Greed does fuel war.

The global arms trade is a multibillion-dollar industry, and when weapons become commodities— the incentive to maintain peace weakens. The lives lost, the homes destroyed, the futures stolen—those become just the cost of doing business for those at the top.

It’s deeply unjust. And it’s so easy to feel powerless in the face of it all. But messages like yours remind me that compassion still speaks, still sees, and still matters.

With appreciation, Anita

I was mistaken in the above post: the destruction I referred to (four dead, not one, all in an apartment building that was hit by an Iranian ballistic missile) took place an hour and 20 minutes before the scheduled ceasefire (Mon, June 24, 7 am, Israel time).

But only 12 minutes later (7:12 am, Israel time), Iran sent 15 more ballistic missiles into the north of Israel. And then again, 3.5 hours later, 2 more missiles were sent into Israel. Four hours later (four hours ago), Israel attacked in Northern Iran.

I want to note that Israel has been targeting Iran’s nuclear infrastructure, ballistic missile capabilities, and scientific personnel directly involved in weapons development. Iran’s missile attacks, however, targe civilian infrastructure: people’s homes (most who live in tall apartment buildings).

Anita

Supposedly, hopefully, this is one hour into a cease fire between the evil regime of Iran, that which has been calling for “Death to Israel!” and “Death to America!” for forty years-… and the tiniest country in the middle east: Israel.

It all came about four hours ago.

Will a cease fire hold by the time I am back to the computer..?

Anita