Hi again, Miss L Dutchess:

You shared before about feeling lonely, about not connecting with (much older) people you work with and wishing you had close friends and having only a few friends and far in between 😞

Why do you think that’s the case (I don’t remember if you shared about it)?

It so happens that I was very lonely most of my life. One reason why I had only a few friends and not for long, was that I was suspicious and distrustful of people. I also easily got angry at people (I suppose the distrust and anger go together).

I don’t remember if you shared before about wishing to have a long-term boyfriend?

Regarding the question in the title of this thread, a simple way to answer is this:

Karma isn’t a punishment system. It doesn’t operate like a cosmic police force handing out tickets. It’s about the natural consequences of our behaviors and outcomes of how we live.

Unkind people often look like they’re getting away with things because consequences can be slow and internal. Someone can appear successful or untouched on the outside while living with chronic conflict, shallow relationships, and distrust.

Some outcomes are visible. Some are not. But no one escapes consequences of their own behavior.

I would very much like to hear your thoughts about all of this.

🌟🍃⭐🌿Anita

Good 🌄 Peter:

I read your message much earlier this morning and gave it time to sink in.

Sustaining the reality of love: being present (vs absent in the ways of analysis, comparisons, measurements, expectations, labels, definitions, judgments, fears, smokes and mirrors).

To stay with and find comfort in the silent (blank) canvas- not rushing to fill it in with noise (paintings)

“Returning to the love that was our origin all along.”- this speaks to me so.. silently loud!

Right there, in those 10 words is everything!

✨️✨️✨️ Ani-natta

Thank you for the answer, Miss L Dutchess 🙂 Now I know, LOL

Well, seems to me that you did a good job confronting him. Problem is a whole lot of people, when confronted, become defensive and retaliate when confronted, no matter how wrong their initial behavior has been.

So, part of confronting a person is to do so in a calm way, using as neutral language as possible (while still delivering the message you have in mind) and then expect some defensiveness, expecting the confronted person to reject your message or get upset with you, or sadly, become somewhat punitive like your mother.

Talking about mothers, mine was punitive as well and I too- as an adult- feared confronting people. So, I kept things inside, angry, and sometimes I would over confront. And I found out that other people in my life were not even close to how punitive my mother has been, so my fear was more than what reality proved to be with other people.

Does any of this resonate?

Good 🌄 Confused:

It ocurred to me earlier this morning that since your analyzing mind habitually goes into overdrive when it comes to analyzing your feelings-

that if you shift the topic of your analysis from your feelings to something else (let’s say joining a chess club where analysis is a big part of the game), it may help.

🤔 Anita

“To be present is to see the other person as they are: their habits, their evasions, their peculiarities, the parts we don’t fully understand. And to meet that without the immediate reflex to fix, improve, or measure them against who they should become.”-

It just occurred to me that it’d be a good idea to have the above said as part of wedding ceremonies.

And if implemented in marriages, how much love-missed misery could prevent.

* Notice: “love-missed misery”- that’s my word-dance 🙂

“But perhaps the practice shifts here. Not toward perfect, unconditional love, but toward a willingness to notice when we’ve left presence and to return.”-

To return to the promised land.

“Presence is not passive. It is attentive, responsive, quietly engaged”-

You’ve been practicing this kind of presence for a long time here in the forums. I remember you were accused of being passive months ago, in one of the threads. You responded with a uniquely engaged-kind of grace- not defensiveness, not offensiveness.

If only world politics was run in this spirit of grace.

“Is this a reality we can stand within?”- to stand within (to not shake it, fight it, turmoil-it).

To stand within it. To B and let B.

To not exert power-over, or to submit to power-over. To void the human power quest- in relationships, personal and global- bombs, nuclear, violence.

But I digress or not. Not.

Ani-natta-nita

Hmm. ChatGPT mentioned ” insecure attachment”- does this resonate for you, that you suffer from insecure attachment?

How R U, Nina?

(as I went over our conversation, I noticed for the first time that I addressed you twice as Mina instead of Nina (having glasses now when using the 📱 helps)

I hope that my last reply was not too heavy?

🤔 Anita