Forum Replies Created
-
AuthorPosts
-
October 5, 2026 at 8:38 pm in reply to: growing up – becoming adul / procrastination – in connection to childhood trauma #461374
anitaParticipantGood Tuesday 6:03 am (your time), Robi:
In this post, I want to analyze Eminem’s lyrics above. But before you read my analysis, that is, what the lyrics bring up for me, maybe you would like to write/ develop your thoughts about what those words bring up for you?
For me-
“I said I’m sorry mama, I never meant to hurt you, I never meant to make you cry”-
That’s the very young Eminem boy, maybe 3, 6 years old. Totally empathetic to his mother, taking responsibility for her hurt, for her crying-
Just as little boys and girls do.
No “bad” words. Only love.
Then the adult Eminem comes on board, A.N.G.R.Y π€ π€¬, saying (rapping) it just-like-he-feels it.
Now, I can’t say the words he says: “fag*** father… fu***** wish he would die… I’d killed him, shit (no reason for me to *** is there?)… You selfish bitch, I hope you fu**** burn in hell for this shit” ( had to *** the f word)-
Point is, the above is beautiful, I can’t say it, but I WANT to!
It gives his anger just the right words.
His emotions find full, true expression. No softening, no philosophy, not even psychology, just straight, unapologetic anger.
He said what I wanted to say to my mother but held it in, suppressing, pushing it all down, going crazy in my head from keeping all the emotions inside.
I’ll move to the computer and continue)
anitaParticipantGood Monday evening (here), Calm Moon:
Thank you for asking. I’m well, taking life one day at a time.. because that’s really all we have.
I also pray every day and make it a daily practice to thank God for positive things happening every day.. and for waking up in the morning to a new day.. one day at a time.
You wrote: “I do not need everyone’s approval. That’s very liberating.”-
I need to practice this very thing more. Thank you, Calm Moon!
You wrote that you want your side gig to fill your own cup before thinking about filling other people’s cups, that is, before thinking about how you can help others. Did I understand?
I like this attitude very much, and it makes sense. It makes sense to help yourself first.
Calm Moon deserves to be helped first, to be prioritized- for a change.
About getting into the victim position in my life, saying something like: ‘I can’t do what others can because of my (limiting) childhood compared to theirs’-
π€ (thinking, pondering)
Well, I didn’t place myself in the victim position growing up (my childhood). I was truly a victim. Like many others.
Like you.
We didn’t choose a victim position. I don’t think victims choose to be victims.
And it’s also true that as adults, once we understand things better, once we gain clarity- it’s our jobs, our responsibility to heal, to fill our on cups first- for a change- and to make it a daily practice.. one day at a time.
Please let me know if I answered your question and if I make sense to you π
Anita
October 5, 2026 at 3:54 pm in reply to: growing up – becoming adul / procrastination – in connection to childhood trauma #461372anitaParticipantEminem β I’m Sorry Mama lyrics (parts)
“I’m sorry mama
I never meant to hurt you
I never meant make you cry
But tonight, I’m cleaning out my closet
One More Time…I got some skeletons in my closet
And I don’t know if no one knows it
So, before they throw me inside my coffin and close it
I’ma expose it, I’ll take you back to ’73
Before I ever had a multi-platinum selling CD
I was a baby maybe I was just a couple of months
My faggot father must’ve had his panties up in a bunch
‘Cause he split, I wonder if he even kissed me goodbye
No I don’t, on second thought I just fucking wished he would die…What I did was stupid, no doubt it was dumb
But the smartest shit I did was take the bullets outta that gun
Cause I’d of killed em, shit I would’ve shot Kim and him both
It’s my life, I’d like to welcome ya’ll to the Eminem showNow I would never diss my own mama just to get recognition
Take a second to listen for who you think this record is dissing
But put yourself in my position, just try to envision
Witnessing your mama popping prescription pills in the kitchen
Bitching that someone’s always going through her purse when shit’s missing
Going through public housing systems, victim of munchhausen syndrome
My whole life I was made to believe I was sick when I wasn’t
‘Til I grew up, now I blew up it makes you sick to your stomach, doesn’t it?
Wasn’t it the reason you made that CD for me, ma?
So, you could try to justify the way you treated me, ma?
But guess what, your getting older now and it’s cold when your lonely…See what hurts me the most, is you wont admit you was wrong
Bitch, do your song, keep telling yourself that you was a mum
But how dare you try to take what you didn’t help me to get
You selfish bitch, I hope you fucking burn in hell for this shit!
Remember when Ronnie died and you said you wished it was me?
Well guess what, I am dead, dead to you as can be”I copied the above because I want to look at these words with you when I’m back to your thread this evening, as well as reply to the rest of your recent post.
Anita
October 5, 2026 at 12:36 pm in reply to: growing up – becoming adul / procrastination – in connection to childhood trauma #461365anitaParticipantThis is a WOW of a different kind: when I remembered Eminem’s song yesterday, about his mother (it’s an autobiographical song), I thought that it might speak to you like it spoke to me, and thought of asking you about it, but then remembered how in the past, with different people, the song I thought would reach them- did not, not at all.. so I learned to no longer expect it.
And unexpectedly, then I read today your experience with the same song!
I loved that song ever since I heard it for the first time, it was sometime in the very early 2000s. Let me check…
“Released: July 29, 2002. (you were only 9!) It is generally considered one of Eminem’s most autobiographical songs. The lyrics draw heavily on his own life, especially his troubled relationship with his mother, Debbie Mathers, feelings about his difficult childhood, resentment toward his absent father, and family experiences and emotional struggles from his upbringing… Sources describe it as an autobiographical work inspired by events from his childhood and family relationships.”
More later
anitaParticipantHi Calm Moon π
Good to read from you this Monday, late morning! Congrats for standing up for yourself and asking for a raise π
And for thinking about starting your own side gig even though it’s scary π
I’ll reply further later.
Anita
October 4, 2026 at 9:55 pm in reply to: growing up – becoming adul / procrastination – in connection to childhood trauma #461348anitaParticipantCopilot (AI) says: “W.O.W!
No, no.. Just kidding π
Let’s try again.
Copilot says: “Yes, Enigma was definitely popular in the U.S., especially that first album, MCMXC a.D. The album reached No. 6 on the Billboard 200 and remained on the chart for more than five years, which is pretty remarkable. It was also certified 4Γ Platinum in the U.S. and sold millions of copies.
I can see the connection between Enya and Enigma. Both create immersive, ethereal soundscapes, but Enigma added a stronger electronic and rhythmic element. MCMXC a.D. was one of those albums that introduced a lot of Americans to new-age/world-influenced music, even if listeners didn’t normally follow the genre.
Yes, Enigma became quite popular in the States, although I’d say the name “Enigma” was much better known than Michael CreΘu. Many people loved the music and recognized tracks like “Sadeness,” but probably couldn’t tell you who created it. He was one of those artists who stayed largely behind the scenes while the project itself became the star. That’s part of what made Enigma feel so intriguing back then..
What I find interesting is that despite all that success, most people remember Enigma and songs like “Sadeness” or “Return to Innocence,” but have no idea who Michael CreΘu is. He seemed to prefer letting the music be the star rather than becoming a celebrity himself.”-
This makes me think about what you wrote earlier: “I need to shift from consumer to creator”- letting your creation be the star rather than becoming a celebrity yourself..?
π€ Anita
October 4, 2026 at 8:03 pm in reply to: growing up – becoming adul / procrastination – in connection to childhood trauma #461346anitaParticipantW. O. W
October 4, 2026 at 8:02 pm in reply to: growing up – becoming adul / procrastination – in connection to childhood trauma #461345anitaParticipantW.O.W.
Well, I am not a fair representation of what music is popular in the U S. The last new American music I was into was Eminem’s song about his mother.
I even remember the words: “I said I’m sorry momma, I never meant to hurt you-ou, I never meant to make you cry, but tonight I’m cleaning out my closet”.
It resonated a lot, the words and the anger in that song.
I will ask AI if the Romanian’s guy’s music was or is popular in the U.S. I’ll be interested in listening to a song there, later on, when I’m back to the computer (using my phone now).
You wrote earlier: “I need to shift from consumer to creator. I was creating once.. a lot. But stopped.. for some reason”-
Could it be the common fear of not being good- enough?
I didn’t read all of your 11:30 pm message, or wasn’t focused enough when I read through it earlier. Now I see that you did explain that’s it’s a picture of your own shadow.
Which brings me to my next post:
October 4, 2026 at 7:33 pm in reply to: growing up – becoming adul / procrastination – in connection to childhood trauma #461344anitaParticipantNo Wayyy: this is you, Robi1992?
I thought it was an AI generated image of a perfect human specimen that doesn’t exist in real life..
(Going back to the photo, enlarging it..
NO WAY!!!
This IS YOU???
You said you’re fit, I had no idea how visibly fit.
(Going back to the photo)..
W. O. W.
Will get back to you, just need to say a few more wows first.
Wow-ed π€― Anita
October 4, 2026 at 7:10 pm in reply to: When family dynamics you grew up with become unacceptable in adulthood #461343anitaParticipantThinking about you this Sunday evening, Nea, hoping you are well π
October 4, 2026 at 3:45 pm in reply to: growing up – becoming adul / procrastination – in connection to childhood trauma #461341anitaParticipantDear Robi:
My goodness, I’m so ignorant when it comes to .. well, lots of things, including Enigma and Enya. I didn’t even recognize the image being from Avatar. For the last decade I haven’t watched TV at all, haven’t seen any movies and I only listen to the same old same old music. I’ll B back 2 U tonight. I hope you’re sleeping restfully at this time, 1:45 am ππ΄π€
Anita
anitaParticipantGood Sunday afternoon, Sleipnir:
Thank you for explaining. I think I understand your point much better now.
It sounds as though what interests you in both Opal and the My Little Pony story is the idea that people who have been deeply hurt often go on to hurt others. That doesn’t excuse the abuse, but it can help explain where it comes from.
I can see why those stories would stand out to you. Both seem to explore how pain can be passed along from one person to another, and how vulnerable people become caught in that cycle.
My thoughts: “Hurt people hurt people” is a common saying, but it’s only partly true. Many people who have been hurt become especially kind and careful not to harm others.
However, some hurt people do end up hurting others for several reasons:
1) When someone grows up around yelling, criticism, neglect, or abuse, may unconsciously repeat what was done to them because it feels familiar.
2) Someone who feels chronically afraid, ashamed, angry, or powerless may lash out when stressed because they have not learned healthier ways to cope.
3) Someone might be so consumed by their own fear, anger, shame, insecurity, or unmet needs that they lose sight of the other person as a separate individual with equally important feelings.
In healthy relating, we hold two realities at once: “I am hurting.” and “You are also a person with your own thoughts, feelings, and needs.”
In unhealthy relating, the first reality crowds out the second.
For example, an angry parent may be so focused on their own frustration that they no longer see the child as a frightened child. They see only an obstacle, a source of stress, or a problem to be controlled. The child’s feelings become invisible.
4) Some people also hurt others in an attempt to regain a sense of power. If they felt powerless or humiliated in the past, dominating someone else can temporarily relieve those feelings, even though it creates more harm.
What is important, though, is that pain explains behavior but does not excuse it. Understanding why an abusive or hurtful person acts the way they do can be useful, but it does not make the behavior acceptable.
Back to you, Sleipnir, your comment about wanting to become “an artist that says things that need to be said” also caught my attention. It sounds as though you want your art to do more than entertain. You want it to shine a light on things that are difficult, important, or often overlooked.
What kinds of things do you most want your art to say?
π€ Anita
October 4, 2026 at 11:31 am in reply to: growing up – becoming adul / procrastination – in connection to childhood trauma #461335anitaParticipantGood very late Sunday morning (here), Robi, Roberta, fellow Capricorns π
Robi (33 years old, not 34 yet), you uploaded.. that’s a Capricorn thing? (It’s been a very long time since I looked at astrology, but I’m now intrigued. I’ll investigate when I’m back to the computer).
I’ll always want to be in touch with you. It even crossed my mind hearing your voice on the phone one day.. too exciting though.
Back 2 U later.
Anita
October 4, 2026 at 11:19 am in reply to: How do I learn to let go of Anger, after years of backstabbing and abuse? #461334anitaParticipantHello again, Sleipnir π
Yes, it’s hard to know you’re helpless in situations when you really are helpless.
This reminds me of the Serenity Prayer which is about this very issue. Here it is:
“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; the courage to change the things I can; and the wisdom to know the difference.”
Does the prayer (which does not require a belief in any particular god, or in any god at all) resonate?
In your other thread thst I just replied to, you asked about exercises to gain wisdom. I think that the serenity prayer (which includes the word “wisdom”) is one such exercise.
Anita
anitaParticipantGood Sunday morning, Sleipnir:
It’s understandable that yelling stresses you to an extreme point. Even when it’s someone else (not you) who is yelled at, and even when it happens in a different room, the yelling still reaches you (it’s the nature of sound.. walls don’t stop it.)
I think that yelling would stress almost everyone, but it disturbs more so people on the autistic spectrum.
I too am stressed by loud, unwelcomed sounds although I was never diagnosed with autism. It’s like those loud sounds (like a neighbor playing loud music) is just too much for me. It disturbs me a whole lot.
In your second post, you asked about exercises to gain wisdom. Well, wisdom has nothing to do with noise sensitivity/ sensory overload. These are neurological.
What can help is that staff members where you live get educated about the negative effects of yelling (and other loud sounds) on residents, as well as noise canceling headphones.
What do you think, Sleipnir?
π€ Anita
-
AuthorPosts
