Dear Robi

I am glad that you start your day intentionally.

Most of us mooch thru the day and only bring gratitude to mind when something either nice or scary/ horrid jolts us out of our dreamlike existence ie you narrowly miss getting hit by a car phew thank goodness wakes us up to how fragile & precious our lives are.

Where as in reality moment by moment there are things to be grateful the clothes you put on were made by some one else  along with the food & utensils, the transport, the building you live in. even your electronic devices.  Strangers alive & dead have given us so much from the moment of our birth to beyond our last breath. It is easy to pause every couple of hours look around you & take a few moments to acknowledge the interconectedness of our lives.

regards

Roberta

Dear Renn

It is possible to feel whole complete and lovable without being in a relationship. A relationship should compliment your life, nurturing with out being stifled, fun with some depth of meaning & room for give and take.

To find out what your heart, head & gut are trying to tell you find a quiet relaxing safe space close your eyes take some deep slow calming breaths and imagine yourself in five years time ie your job where your living, hobbies etc  be aware how you are feeling are your hands open or closed is your face relaxed & smiling?    and then add in your bf into the mix, note now how your body feels, if it is shrinking or tensing  or bracing itself in anyway then it is probably time to draw a line on this relationship.

Best wishes

Roberta

Dear Simon

I did write a post but manged to loose it when looking back to check that I had read something correctly.

So now due to time pressure it will be short . “Real meditation in minutes a day” may help get you started.

regards Rob

Dear Rob

It appears from what you have been saying is that when you were in Warsaw you had a strong bout of nostalgia about Alicante. You then acted on that feeling and went back. But of course you have changed and the things that you enjoyed as a younger singleton do not now hold the same attraction. Now there is a strong pull to be back in Warsaw with your girlfriend. There is nothing wrong in admitting that the dream of Alicante and the reality of it did not match up.

Hopefully in future when the grass is greener thoughts arise you will be able to evaluate them, then again you may just be nomadic and have wanderlust all your life.

Kind regards

Dear Sarah

I am sorry that your mother is ill.

What ever the prognosis is, what is important is to let your mum know that she is loved and that you appreciate all that she has done for you. If you do not have any easy relationship with your mother, now is the time to work on forgiveness/ acceptance look for & hold onto any good memories or qualities.  My mother was a strong personality and we had interesting encounters but in the last year of her life I had to see & remind myself that my mother had become frail, fearful & some times in pain,  then an up welling of love & compassion would arise within me & I could temporary put aside the baggage of our past.

kind regards

Roberta

Dear Dave

Just a quick heads up you may need to speak to an accountant about the tax implications re selling both properties. ie the smaller property is now your principal address so maybe for you no capital gains tax on that property, but your wife may have to pay tax on her half and then vice versa for the larger family house. Therefore your tax burden could possibly be greater.

As for your new romance, since i guess you have been upfront & both the lady you are seeing and your ex know about each other.  Enjoy .

Dear Maria

“There is an underlying conflict I am experiencing… to be of service without putting restraints on me in terms of presence or time… for better work life balance… 

A couple of options come to mind you could choose to work part/three quarter/flexi time at your current job if that is financially viable and spend your extra free time volunteering in a sector that appeals to you or you could possibly do agency work, that way you get to see a variety of establishments and can suss out which ones are good to work for and that way when a permanent vacancy occurs in your favourite company you could apply. Some companies actively promote their staff doing a certain amount of voluntary work during office hours.

Roberta

Dear Kshiti1502

I am reading a book by Richard Moss called Inside-Out Healing which I have found to be outstandingly helpful with understanding the stories we tell ourselves & the feelings they evoke.

Best wishes

Roberta