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jock

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  • October 31, 2015 at 3:58 am in reply to: Was any of your parents good-enough? #86464
    jock
    Participant

    I hope you’re not lecturing me now, Moon. 🙂
    That would be an interesting twist to this thread I admit but your post needs to be more direct as well.
    This is what Anita is getting at. Authenticity and direct language. Good phrasing can avoid confusion and misinterpretation.
    If this is “just an online forum” why bother posting at all?

    How do you know “no one is here to attack anyone”? Can you read their mind?

    • This reply was modified 10 years, 1 month ago by jock.
    October 30, 2015 at 9:48 pm in reply to: Was any of your parents good-enough? #86457
    jock
    Participant

    I’ll have a go.
    Snails asks:
    Anita, are you happy right now?
    My impression is that Anita reminds Snails of her own mother who used to bring up the past and complain about her childhood.
    My view? Anita is not Snail’s mother. Transference? Anita is entitled to complain about her own mother and childhood because she has a lot of credibility on this forum.

    • This reply was modified 10 years, 1 month ago by jock.
    • This reply was modified 10 years, 1 month ago by jock.
    October 30, 2015 at 8:16 pm in reply to: Power in Relationships #86454
    jock
    Participant

    I mean you meet people who like to have the edge in a conversation, don’t you. They might like to steer the conversation towards study if they have a Masters for instance. Or if they are a successful business person, they like to talk about the risks they took to start a successful business, how anyone can do it, if they just have their courage. When I was young and single, I met guys who loved to talk about their success with the opposite sex. And of course my grandmother used to love talking about her “amazing”children to any stranger she met. 🙂
    In an ideal world, conversations would be mutually respectful. People wouldn’t feel so insecure that they needed to impress others. They wouldn’t need to patronise others either. We place too much value on what others think of us. We need to only care what we think of ourselves.
    There endeth the lesson. 🙂

    • This reply was modified 10 years, 1 month ago by jock.
    October 30, 2015 at 2:51 pm in reply to: I can't live with myself anymore #86448
    jock
    Participant

    I would add my support to you as well, Name.
    Due to such high standard replies as Anita’s and Pepper Jill’s, another person is helped yet again in this crazy world without love. Tiny Buddha Forum, making a difference….to lives that feel lost.

    October 30, 2015 at 2:43 pm in reply to: Obsessive Thoughts #86447
    jock
    Participant

    Brenda
    hi
    hypervigilance that’s the word thanks
    Guess there is a bit of paranoia in there as well 🙂

    October 30, 2015 at 1:46 pm in reply to: Buddhism for Beginners #86442
    jock
    Participant

    Glenda watch this please

    October 30, 2015 at 12:53 pm in reply to: Dealing with loneliness? #86440
    jock
    Participant

    you could try this one if you like

    October 29, 2015 at 7:03 pm in reply to: Addicted to Relationships? #86409
    jock
    Participant

    It’s just another addiction. Maybe there should be a 12 step program for it. I think we all need to learn to be happy by ourselves. Sure we need other people and we need companionship and intimacy but I’ve found being alone can also spark creativity, if we use the time wisely.

    October 29, 2015 at 2:27 pm in reply to: Buddhism for Beginners #86395
    jock
    Participant

    ^
    sorry glenda but I think you’re living in the dark ages. Buddhism is here to stay in multicultural countries like Australia and the U.S.
    I’m glad too. We get the wisdom of the east added to our culture which gives us a different perspective. Kinda dangerous to always have the same perspective, don’t you think?

    October 29, 2015 at 10:50 am in reply to: Obsessive Thoughts #86380
    jock
    Participant

    And so what if they wanted you to leave? Were you afraid of them creating a scene if they kicked you out

    I think that’s it Inky. I don’t like scenes. I don’t like confrontation or conflict.

    It is the brain scanning the environment for danger: where is the next threat coming from

    Yes I that it is overvigilance too Anita.

    October 29, 2015 at 1:39 am in reply to: Was any of your parents good-enough? #86362
    jock
    Participant

    I think narcissistic control freaks and neglectful drug addicts should not be allowed to have children. But then that makes me judgemental, doesn’t it.

    October 28, 2015 at 1:57 pm in reply to: Buddhism for Beginners #86331
    jock
    Participant

    ^
    can you break it down for us?
    That’s hardcore reading, in my opinion. 🙂

    October 27, 2015 at 11:44 pm in reply to: Buddhism for Beginners #86287
    jock
    Participant

    On a minor note, some hardcore Buddhists won’t kill any living thing and that includes cockroaches or mosquitos. I feel for those Buddhist monks meditating in Thailand, and not being able to swat insects that are biting them. 🙂

    • This reply was modified 10 years, 1 month ago by jock.
    October 27, 2015 at 5:13 pm in reply to: Dealing with loneliness? #86263
    jock
    Participant

    I guess I feel I have drifted away from my friends….that conventional path of getting promotions at work, then getting a house, car, kids….I feel that is very empty. I am trying to find more meaning to life….through mindfulness meditation, through reading zen books & listening to TEDtalk. Yet I feel a very small population is opened to talking about this stuff.

    well, there are a few of us here very willing to talk about that stuff. See thread on spirituality started by moongal.

    Making a living and money, I find are obstacles to happiness, in my view. We get stuck at survival level, worried about our finances, and we neglect spirituality. Unless of course we make use of our suffering, and become more compassionate.

    October 27, 2015 at 2:37 pm in reply to: Buddhism for Beginners #86255
    jock
    Participant

    was wondering what exactly do you mean by a higher power here?

    God.
    12 step drug/alcohol rehab programs use the term “higher power” to cover the term “god” more broadly. For me it is Jesus Christ, as it is for other Christians.
    Buddhism has Buddha but Buddhists don’t pray to him. They study his teaching to learn how to be happy but they don’t worship him.
    If you follow the “enthusiastic Buddha” series on youtube, a lot of this is covered. But the learning is all fun in my opinion.

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