Dear Anita,

How was your weekend?

Hmm I think you’re right I do have to work on that since everything isn’t in our hands. I do need to see the good progress that I am making so I can build up my confidence

About believing in your inherent worth:
So I think more or less has to do with my Childhood Emotional Neglect (CEN) like lot of people my parents didn’t knew my emotional needs and they did what they thought is right for me. They just wanted to protect me so…
So I’ve dealt with very Low self-esteem, self-compassion and self-confidence but I think it’s lot better than before Although I did built up kind of Insecure-avoidant attachment pattern which I’m still working on
Another thing is that in my teenage years I was very good in education area so they really had high hopes for me so I felt pressure, got really anxious, chosen wrong college course and eventually drop out from college because I knew I didn’t liked it and started my professional career earlier without even bachelor’s because I had good tech skills even at that time. And I’m living on my own since 16 years of age. And that time my parents were supportive of my decision, and they are still supportive.. It was a bad decision to start profession journey without bachelors’ I realized that so I started my bachelor’s as a distance student and full-time job…
But still they (Also me) want a good stability at this age which I’m not there yet. Even though I should be and I’m trying
Maybe that’s why I’m not feeling my worth?
Sorry if it’s too much info or maybe not really relevant… But I just felt like saying it so

Dear Anita:
I hope you’re having great Sunday morning 🌞

To the answer, I actually had to look up how to know if you’re self-confident.
According to usf.edu
It means you accept and trust yourself and have a sense of control in your life. You know your strengths and weakness well and have a positive view of yourself. You set realistic expectations and goals, communicate assertively, and can handle criticism.

Let me break it to you now

It means you accept and trust yourself
I accept myself but I don’t I trust myself very highly because I feel what if things go this way instead of this?  and also, I have hard time trusting other people as well

have a sense of control in your life
Not Always. I used to have very controlling behavior about everything but thanks to meditation and mindfulness practice I’m getting lot better

You know your strengths and weakness
I do and still exploring those

have a positive view of yourself

I do have positive view of myself

You set realistic expectations and goals
Yes I do. I’m very rational thinker and minimalistic as well so

communicate assertively, and can handle criticism.
Both Yes very well

To your definition
a feeling of trust in your abilities and judgment – I do have trust in my abilities but if I’m trying too hard for too long yet I don’t see the progress I get frustrated for the time that I wasted, which makes it worse and that cycle uuugh
I just wanna feel like I’m making a good progress tbh

believing in your inherent worth: that inherently, you are not inferior to anyone.
I think I do believe in my worth but still have to work
I don’t compare myself to others like before though

Dear Anita,

I can totally understand maybe that’s kind perfectionism because you don’t like to make mistakes. But as for my experience I think making mistakes is how we grow and improve. I mean faced similar situation where I just circle round with the same things if I’m not able to resolve that mistake. What happened, Happened. now there’s another chance of mistake but as crazy it may sound I just myself this question If “I make that mistake would I die? Probably not” then there’s another thing that people always says like you should learn from your mistakes and yeah, it’s true but for mind it’s not that easy. Mind doesn’t like to create new patterns that easily so you shouldn’t spend energy in something that you’re not capable of YET. I try to note things down what worked right and what can I improve next time
I guess you already know these things very well than me, but we all need reminders time to time so…
Have an Funtastic day 😀

Thanks a lot Anita. I think you’re right. I also do the gratitude prayers in the morning time. 🙂