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Thomas168ParticipantWell, got to say it is nice to see you back again. Hope you are in good spirits. Hope all is well with your family. That is one way of looking at the world. It exist when you are born. But, I think it existed before that and will exist long after I am gone.
Thomas168ParticipantRoberta,
That is a great idea. When helping others, it is tough to feel depressed.
Volunteering keeps one busy and when being around others, it helps one feel connected.Thomas168ParticipantI think that is one of the twelve step in AA. Accept the things one can not change and to change those things that one can. I forgot the rest of the steps.
Thomas168ParticipantDear Anita,
Sorry. It is not nightmarish as much as the norm. I too wish it was better but it is the reality we live in. Have a healthy, happy and safe year.
January 19, 2026 at 11:14 am in reply to: I’m gonna use a Portable DVD Player instead of using streaming services. #454325Thomas168ParticipantSorry, that is a very long opening post. So I will just go by the title of the thread. Use a DVD player instead of streaming service. Not sure of the intent. Are you angry with the streaming services? Is there a grudge or something? It is quite okay to do whatever you want. And you don’t have to justify it with anyone. Just wanted to know if there was anything connected with this decision? Is it monetary?
History of rental stores versus streaming service shows that streaming is more popular. So, it makes me ask why go with DVD? You like to make a collection. I did something similar when I was laid off. I spent money on CDs that had movies on them. Ended up with a big selection. But, it just sits there and collects dusts. Watched them once and that was it.
There are services such as Tubi. They have actual TV stations. Sports and news and variety shows.
Aleesa, love Red Dwarf. Sci-fi about an evolved cat and a human goof ball and an uptight hologram. Later on a robot is added to the mix.
Thomas168ParticipantAdvice?? The only thing I can think of is to actually talk with him. Spell it out. Tell him how much you care about him as a friend. Reminder him of all the times you were there to help him. Then tell him about your own needs. Ask him to seek therapy or find someone who can help him in the way he really needs. You being there is more like a co-dependent. Are you assisting him in staying this way instead of getting better? Over time, he has got to change and get better cause you can not be there forever. Being honest and caring with your words. Make sure he understands that this type of relationship can not last forever this way. It has to change and become better. It has to allow for you to grow and have a life just like he must change and grow and have a life.
Yeah, please don’t take my advice cause I do not give good advice. I see things differently.
Thomas168ParticipantSomehow lost the part where I took my mom to the emergency room after she was knocked down and hit her head. Near midnight. I finally took her home around 4 am. I slept in the waiting room while they did her cat scan on her head. Crazy, type too fast and lost that part.
Thomas168ParticipantAnita,
During the intake, the nurses were able to determine it was more a stomach related issue. And anyone who has chest pains would have been taken in first. They have triage procedures which help to take care of such situations when there are more than one person with chest pains. It may be a safe approach by saying it was digestion related. But, that don’t help when your sitting in pain. Which I have done when I had kidney stones. Got into Er waiting room at 12 pm. Did not get in to see the intake nurse until 4:30pm. Then sat around while they came around to take insurance information. Then at 6:30pm to finally see the doctor and get a cat scan ordered. 8:30pm to get the cat scan and then 9:30pm to get released with prescription for pain killers. Got prescription the next day when the pharmacy opened. Yeah, that kept everyone safer. The front desk asked about the injury and told to take a seat. Hardly anyone in the waiting room. two hours before seeing the intake nurse. Then another half hour before the doctor came. They did the can scan while I was sleeping in the waiting room for my mom. Around 4am I was able to take her home.
Yeah, safer for everyone. I get it. Still, the system is not working. Do you live in Canada? The wait time is even more. Getting a schedule appointment is tough. This is because the government stuck their nose into it and made everything free. I am sorry. No one died because my BIL was taken in first. They are trained to take serious stuff first. But when you go to reception to register to be in line, they don’t know anything. They only ask what is the problem. It is the intake nurses that are trained. So, it is a matter of seeing the intake nurses. They do the triage. If you are sitting in the waiting room cause you said my baby is not feeding and threw up then you could be sitting a long time before seeing the triage nurse. Once anyone sees the triage nurse or intake nurse then they can determine what or who is next.
I get your point. I hope you see mine too. No one cares about you unless you do. The squeaky wheel get the oil. Never mind. My advice was bad. I take it back. Don’t listen to me. That should
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Thomas168ParticipantJames,
How are you doping? Hope you and yours are well.
Please hope you are feeling better and will be back soon.Thomas168Participantprotect … ***Him, not her**
Thomas168ParticipantAlessa said, “Haha I’m not brave enough to try that one Tommy! 😂”
Do you mean exaggerating a symptom in order to get doctors to take a look?? When my brother in law went to the hospital, I knew it was stomach or spleen related. But, if I had said it was stomach issues then we would have been sitting in the waiting room for hours before even being seen by the intake nurse. Complaining about chest pains, they took him in and got him seen. After the initial intake, they finally gave him some pain killer. Can you imagine sitting in the waiting room in pain for hours? Got to remember, this is your baby. You are going to have to do what is needed to protect her. Not out right lying. It is the same line as not leaving when told the baby is fine. You got to push a little. In the end, the baby got more attention and you learned a little more. Okay, may stress that the baby didn’t take any fluids and throwing up a bit more?? Okay, reconsidering, maybe my advice isn’t such a great one. I take it back.
Just happy to hear the baby is close to being back to his regular self.
Thomas168ParticipantPeter said, “Either way, if he was a man of his word, and didn’t pretend he didn’t receive the key, he left without the diamonds. And I wonder if that might make anyone reading the story pause.“.
I think that was why the story ended there. So one can guess what happens next according to their own understanding. If one believes the rich man found the key to happiness then would leave the diamonds. If the rich man did not find the key to happiness then he would have kept the diamonds for the person believes the diamonds were the key. In many cases, people bring up the idea that the man did not keep the diamonds but rather that the diamonds kept the man. The man put his artificial value on the diamonds and that determines whether the man is happy or not.
There is the story of the monk who came home one night to find there was a thief in his house. When he opened the door, he spotted the thief going thru the drawers. So the monk stepped up and pulled all the clothes out and gave it to the thief. he then took off all his clothes and gave it to the thief. The thief, not knowing what was going on, took all that the monk had and ran off into the night. The monk stood by the window and said, “The moon can not be stolen“. When I first read that story years ago, I did not understand. But, turns out that whatever one puts value on becomes an attachment. Attachments are what pulls us and keeps us tied to it. so, got to be careful what one considers valuable.
Thomas168ParticipantPeter said, “— a real master would just sit, or laugh, or whack you with a stick and be done with it.“.
That sounds more like the reputation a Zen master might have rather than what a teacher might do. Which I believe would be to talk with the inquirer. Find out if the person has a practice. Whether it is meditation or Zazen or something else. See what state the person is in. See what obstructions there are and then see how to remove them. Of course, people in present times do not just follow instruction without question. So, there are lessons to be taught along the way.
Personally, I thought the key to happiness is finding how to be content with what one already has. When the diamonds were gone, the man made himself anxious and full of regret. He tore himself apart over the lost of the diamonds. Later when he got the diamonds back, he became happy again. So, it wasn’t the diamonds. It was himself that made him feel sadness or joy. That is the key to happiness. In doing ordinary chores, one should find it in oneself, the joy of life.
Another person once told me that his practice has come to the point where he sits in quiet. And he finds no joy or pleasure in life. That it has all become dull and he has no interests. He thinks Buddha was so right about life being full of suffering. To me, there is something wrong in his practice. Removing obstacles in one’s path to full awareness should bring a light heart and not a viewpoint of suffering. We decide if life is good or not. Also we decide what to do about it. Feeling lackluster about life?? That is just another prison the mind makes to keep us from freedom.
Sorry, rambling. My head tends to do that. Got to watch out for that. Falling into traps.
Thomas168ParticipantAlessa,
Thanks for the update. Waiting in ER? For hours? Makes me rub my hands together to think of what I can say to speed things up. Something like the baby is having a hard time breathing. Doesn’t matter if it is true or not. The baby can’t help themselves. I once took my brother in law to the emergency room. He was having stomach issues. My wife said to tell them he has chest pains. So instead of sitting in the waiting room for hours. They took him in right away. They spent a little time with him and made him sit inside the treatment er room. later they got a bed for him. Don’t down play his condition. And it was good that you refuse to leave. Better to be there a little longer than to have to come back later.
Good news that he is keeping some food down. Hope he breaks the fever soon. hoping thing only get better.
Thomas168ParticipantPeter,
Please continue with your comments about the stories. Because we mostly identify with the thoughts, you giving thoughts to the stories gives them flesh so we come to an understanding. It also shows your deep understanding of the Dharma. It lets others think about it too. Of course, this might not be something the Buddha would be trying to spread. So Buddha wasn’t about learning stuff and making a collection of information or stories. It is about sharing and letting the nature happiness in ourselves come out. So please continue.
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Though I run this site, it is not mine. It's ours. It's not about me. It's about us. Your stories and your wisdom are just as meaningful as mine.