Dear ellieslp,

You can certainly do that “energetically” (and not physically) by doing the below forgiveness exercises.

1) Do a variation of Ho’oponopono

Continously chant/say,
I’M SORRY PLEASE FORGIVE ME THANK YOU

Simply say it! Say it over and over. Mean it.
You may say it to whoever you believe as God, or to Nature, or to the Universe, or to Life, or to the Source of Creation, or to your own self, or simply in the air to nobody.

Just say it either verbally, mentally, loudly or softly, however you want to.
Say it as many times as you can/want.

2) Another similar variation

Format: I _______ FORGIVE YOU _____________, YOU ALSO PLEASE FORGIVE ME AND RELEASE ME, THANK YOU.
Example: I FORGIVE YOU , YOU ALSO PLEASE FORGIVE ME AND RELEASE ME, THANK YOU.

Keep saying this the same way as explained in No.1 Either mentally, loudly or softly or however it works best for you. You can even frequently write it and then burn/tear the paper.

While saying “YOU PLEASE FORGIVE ME AND RELEASE ME”, put greater stress/emphasis on the words “FORGIVE ME AND RELEASE ME”.

These energetic exercises are to break the negative link or to cut the negative energy cords between the both of you. The end result would be harmonious and in alignment with you and for your greater good.

Remember to say it as many times as possible. You can even say it involuntarily (meaning: just like alphabets ABCD… without thinking much about them, or like singing a song). If you are doing something else and you are disturbed by his memories, then immediately start chanting and do it continuously till you are OK.

Best Wishes,
VJ

Hi thecarelessowl,

I will let you know on some of the teachings from Neale Donald Walsch.

“You cannot experience what you do not allow others to experience.”

So if you see someone meeting a celebrity, allow them to meet the celebrity. Let them enjoy. Let them have a great time.
If someone has traveled to an exotic location or won an award, allow them to be as it is. Let them have the time of their lives.

If your automatic thought “that could’ve been me” kicks in – then start a new practice of reminding yourself of a new shift in perception-
“I cannot experience what I do not allow others to experience. If I need all of these things (celebrity, exotic locations, award) in my life, then I need to allow other people to have them too. They too are part of this planet. They too are fellow beings here on earth. If I allow things to be for them, then the same things will be allowed to me by Life/Universe at a different time”

When you want for the whole world what you want for yourself- peace, joy, wisdom, happiness, love, abundance, bliss, public attention, great vacations, awards – you multiply the energy you send out – the cycle begins with you and completes with you (which also means the experience comes to you). It has to come. It’s a Universal Law. It has no other choice.

“I try to be grateful for what I have, but it feels fake. Like I’m not truly grateful and lying to myself. I try to be happy for others in those instances and that feels fake too.”

From now on start a new practice. STOP thinking of gratefulness for others (thinking) and START doing something great for others (acting/doing).
Do not worry about you. Your life will be taken care of (by the cycle explained above). Worry about everyone whose life you will touch.

Love, abundance, compassion, forgiveness, understanding…… The fastest way to experience that you are these things is to BE these things. And the fastest way to experience yourself being these things is to give these things away.

Give others every experience you wish to seek.
The fastest way to have any experience is to cause others to have the same experience. Whatever you wish to experience in your own life, cause another to experience in theirs.
If you wish to experience love, cause another to be loved.
If you wish to experience abundance, cause another to be abundant.
If you wish to experience success, cause another to be successful.
If you wish to experience forgiveness, cause another to be forgiven.
If you wish to experience peace, cause another to be at peace.

This also includes causing another to experience having the time of their lives.

First focus on the other, always the other, never first on the Self. Whatever you wish to create for yourself, create for another.

And this can be done in innumerable ways depending on what you are good at and what you enjoy doing the most, but keeping in mind it is at first for the benefit of others……
Because what you bring to another, you bring to the Self.

Take Care,
VJ

Dear Libby,

“Any suggestions for dealing with depression? any books you could recommend?…. I love self help books on anxiety but no idea where to start with depression self help.”

I am also a user of self-help books and techniques.
I will suggest you to take a look at ‘The Healing Codes’.

Dr. Alex Loyd developed a technique after his wife Tracey “Hope” Loyd had severe depression for several years and couldn’t find anything to cure it.

She speaks in this video..
(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JFL6I3WlmWs)

The full details of the technique is available in The Healing Codes book-
(https://www.amazon.com/Healing-Code-Minutes-Success-Relationship/dp/1455502006)

The book has everything you need but if you do not have the time and patience to wait till you finish the book (because, apart from the actual technique the book also explains the how/why of everything) and if you have the required financial capabilities then you can also consider Personal Coaching on this process, which is done by a Certified Healing Codes Practitioner. You will get all of that information from their official website (below). Read out the number of positive reviews on the Amazon link above to know how it is helping people.

Official Website:
www(dot)thehealingcodes(dot)com

Moreover, the same technique can also be used for all other issues that you mentioned too.
(http://thehealingcodes.com/success-stories/)

Warm Regards,
VJ

You’re welcome, Russ. I get you about the implementation of the concepts. Have you heard or read about the book/movie ‘Secret’? If not please read/watch it. I recommend both, the book as well as the movie. I say this because I understand what state of mind you are currently at. That will be a very good place to start. When you understand how thoughts become things you will change your mindset towards working on what you want to achieve and then implementation of concepts would become natural without effort.

Best wishes,
VJ

Hi Russ,

Yes, as I stated in one of my earlier posts to you that you may find it difficult to understand being the spacious awareness, as it can only be described by me but experienced only by you. You need not worry much about it. You will eventually experience what it is. Life is very intelligent. It knows what you need and at what time. If you already had friends you would be “enjoying” with them and would have never come to this site, to understand the various concepts and viewpoints of Life by various members. Only suffering leads to awakening.

“I would like on that remote the “time for friends” button to push when I choose to be with friends…understanding that the act of having friends does not define me or contributes solely to my fulfillment of happiness. Having the option on the remote would be nice.”

With wanting to have an extra button on the remote of life, see if you are placing a demand on any situation, person, place, or event. See to it if you are resisting to what already is. That truly does not mean that you should not strive to achieve friends. But there is a difference between preferences and requirements.
Preferences is based on detached expectation. If I get “this” I am fine, even if I don’t, I’m fine too. Thus it is less painful. Your inner state of mind is no longer dependent on any external situation. You are totally detached from the outcome.

Requirements on the other hand is based on attached expectation. You have an attachment and cling on to it. I want “this” no matter what. I feel painful if I don’t get or have it. And once you get it and if you lose that, you will again be in pain. Internal state of mind is always dependent on an external situation.

If having no friends is troubling you and if that is why you have posted here, then you are on the Requirements side and the below statement are only mere words and not true understanding.
“….understanding that the act of having friends does not define me or contributes solely to my fulfillment of happiness”

Realize if wanting a new button is an impossible demand on the manufacturer of the remote, because it has already been designed that way and delivered to your home. That will not mean that you should live with this remote forever. When you allow the “isness” of this moment to be as it is (by focusing more on being yourself, doing what you love), that is when things begin to change for the good and then a new television with a new additional button on the remote produced by a different manufacturer will land in your place, when you are least expecting it. And at that time it will be detached expectation because you are already enjoying life by doing the things you love, and whether or not having a new button may not bother you anymore.

Not sure if you took a look at the video that I suggested you. If not, please do so, as that will give you a glimpse on Acceptance, Surrender and Non-resistance.
Also please make notes of all that you liked on this thread from various members and put them into practice.

Take care,
VJ

Hi RandyG,

“I do find the term “empath” fascinating, as being an empath you know all too well you are affected by other people’s “energies”. Thus this gives you an innate ability to intuitively feel and perceive others.”

Yes that “empath”etic nature itself allowed me come to this site and “sense” people’s problems and offer with whatever solutions I can. Again that was one of the reasons I could deeply “sense” and understand your problems and so chimed in.

“As for any other healing techniques, I am not too sure I can honestly answer that correctly as I truly believe there is nothing to heal”
I have a slightly different opinion about this. Yes anyone being a H/ESP is not a disorder, but a personality trait. But I do feel that there is something to heal otherwise people with it wouldn’t have been on this site or any other e/hsp forum asking on what to do or how to handle the emotional or high sensitivities.

I will try to apply the candle method you suggested.

I read your comments about EFT and that it being used by other people and their experiences, but didn’t find anything if you tried it and whether it worked or not. So I will add it to the below.

1. EFT (or Emotional Freedom Techniques):

Articles on EFT and vidoes on how to do it can be found all over the web.

Below is an article for HSP
(http://tap-easy.com/eft-tapping-for-highly-sensitive-person/)

and the EFT Tapping scripts on this link which you can customise as per the statements that resonate with you.
(http://tap-easy.com/eft-tapping-script-highly-sensitive-person/)

2. Donna Eden’s Energy Medicine Technique:

The ZipUp Technique

You can make use of the ZipUp Technique to protect your energies from external influences.
Below is a direct link to the post where I have explained the technique with an image, written steps and a video.
(http://tinybuddha.com/topic/done-with-the-negative-engery-i-hope/#post-114161)

Clicking the link will take you to the direct post on the entire thread.
You can read from the wordings “Here is a simple and practical energy healing technique…” on that post.

3. Bach Flower Remedies:

Doing a web search on Bach Flower Remedies can explain what they are and their usage.
I used the ‘Walnut’ remedy after reading the below article.
(https://www.flowerspirit.co.uk/3-bach-flower-remedies-for-hsps/)
Among others the flower essences are available on Amazon.com

—————————
At times, at home, whenever those overwhelming feelings take over, the alternate nostril breathing technique has helped. I have added it as No 2. in the below post.
(http://tinybuddha.com/topic/relaxation-meditation-techniques/#post-114812)

It has constantly been even my quest to find something that could be applied in a public setting.
I have used the ZipUp technique in those situations. I secretly lay my hand over my lap and visually/mentally run my hand from the pubic bone to the lip and lock them up as per the process. I do it several times. Also sometimes I do the full technique at the washroom when I felt that I don’t want to miss a chance.

To minimise the sensitivities during the day in public, I used to do the energy medicine technique as a morning ritual before heading for the day and used to take the Bach remedies right from the start of the day. I had kept a bottle of drinking water at my workplace desk and once in the morning added a few drops of the flower essences into it and used to sip it at regular intervals all throughout the day. Who would know what’s in it as it is just like someone is drinking water.

I have referenced the words “used to” in the above sentences, but I have to start doing them again.

As of now these are the tips and techniques that I can share for H/ESP. If you come across any beneficial method please do share on this post as I will be doing the same.

Best wishes,
VJ

Hi randyg,

Being a HSP (which I don’t think is much different than ES) and an empath I have equipped myself with certain tools and methodologies which gives relief. I will be sharing that with you to help in your situation but would like to know if you ever have used any of the healing techniques say for eg; EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques)? Also do let me know if you have used any other ones.

Regards,
VJ

Hi Niki,

Yes all of what you have explained about your state of mind is truly understandable given what has happened.
I want to tell you clearly that life is not a bed of roses without thorns. There are going to be problems. Every single person has. Go through the issues from various members of this site and you will see what people are facing. The TinyBuddha homepage says over 2 million friends & followers. Such an amount won’t be possible if people are not in problems. One needs to face up and come out the them.

If you want to come out of your problems I will suggest you to get out of the “head mode” and get more into “action mode”. Get started.
Listen to the audios on the link that I posted above. Have you heard of Brahmakumaris in India? B.K. sister Shivani is a wonderful person and listening to her talks is really a life-changer. Based on personal experience I can tell you that every thing is in the head. It will start to get clear gradually in the coming time- what career to do, a change of mindset about getting a suitable life partner. Everything.

English being a second language and not a national language in India, I can see in all your posts that your writing is really good. So something tells me about you that wherever you go an whatever you do, you will do well.

Allow time to take time.

Live Your Best and Leave The Rest.

~VJ

• This reply was modified 7 years, 11 months ago by VJ.
• This reply was modified 7 years, 11 months ago by VJ.