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How I Lost Myself in a Controlling Friendship and What I Know Now

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“The most common form of despair is not being who you are.” ~Søren Kierkegaard

I didn’t lose her all at once.

I lost myself first—slowly, quietly, in the way that only happens when someone you trust makes you doubt everything you think and feel.

She was magnetic when I met her. Warm, intense, the kind of person who made you feel chosen just by giving you her attention. I felt lucky to be her friend. That feeling lasted just long enough to blur what came next.

It started with small things. A plan I made that somehow became her plan. …

A Peaceful Life

By in Fun & Inspiring

The Quiet Grief No One Talks About

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How Being the Strong One in My Family Became a Trap

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“The world breaks everyone, and afterward, many are strong at the broken places.” ~Ernest Hemingway

My grandmother had just died. My sister and I had come from the room where her body still lay, and we were standing in the elevator in silence when the doors slid closed. My sister looked at me and said, “Now you’re the last strong one in this family.”

It was comforting to hear her words. I felt proud. And then, almost immediately, something else. My stomach clenched. I just wanted to stop the elevator, run away, and never look back. My sister wasn’t …

I Just Want to Feel Light

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Take It One Step at a Time

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Lessons from Slowing Down: What My Body Needed to Feel Better

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“Take care of your body. It’s the only place you have to live.” ~Jim Rohn

I used to think tiredness was a personality trait.

I was the person who could work fourteen hours, sleep five, and do it again. I wore my exhaustion like armor. It proved I was serious. It proved I was dedicated. It proved I was worth something.

What it actually proved was that I was running my body into the ground.

The Surgeon Who Could Not Heal Herself

I trained as a surgeon in London. My days started before the sun came up. They ended …

You’ll Do What You Have to Do

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Have a Little Faith in Yourself

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How to Overcome Ultra-Independence and Receive Love and Support

By in Blog, love & relationships

“Ultra-independence is a coping mechanism we develop when we’ve learned it’s not safe to trust love or when we are terrified to lose ourselves in another. We aren’t meant to go it alone. We are wounded in relationship and we heal in relationship.” ~Rising Woman

Do you feel like you have to do everything on your own?

Is it difficult for you to ask for and receive help for fear of being let down?

Have you ever heard the expression “Ultra-independence may be a trauma response”?

If this is you, I get it; that was me too.

Please know there …

You Were Doing the Best You Could

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The Hardest Thing to Get Over

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The Powerful Insight That Helped Me Worry Less and Sleep Again

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“Surrender is not about giving up. It is about letting go of the illusion of control.” ~Judith Orloff

Watching my mother lose her memory while I was losing mine felt like a cruel preview of my future—until I learned that stress, not genetics, was writing my story.

It was 3:47 a.m.—again. I’d been awake since 2:13, and before that I’d slept maybe ten minutes.

This had been my pattern for years: wake up shortly after falling asleep, check the clock, lie there frustrated.

Wake again, check the clock, review the day prior, and plan the next day.

But this …

Some of the Most Meaningful Boundaries

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One of the Most Important Things You Can Be

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Breaking Free from Self-Consciousness and Erythrophobia

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“Shame is the intensely painful feeling or experience of believing that we are flawed and therefore unworthy of love and belonging.” ~Brené Brown

I used to call myself a “beetroot.” It was a label of defectiveness that my inner critic screamed at me every time I felt the heat rising in my cheeks. For years, I lived with erythrophobia, an intense and persistent fear of blushing that quietly dismantled my world from the inside out.

Most people blush. A warm flush creeps up the neck before a first date or a public speech, and then it passes. For me, …

We Weren’t Meant to Live This Fast

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You Only Get So Many Minutes

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The Credit You Deserve

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To the Wounded Parent Who Wants to Do Everything Right

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“The greatest gift you can give your children is your own healing.” ~Dr. Shefali Tsabary

Am I doing too much or not enough?

Am I screwing my child up? Am I being too hard on my child? Am I being too soft? Am I spending enough time with my child? Do I help too much? Should I help more?

Is my son going to be taken advantage of because he talks about his feelings? Is my daughter going to be considered too bossy because she has boundaries? Should I be doing more as a parent? Or less?

These are the …