Let People Think Whatever They Want
The Lonely Ache of Self-Worth That No One Talks About
“The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain.” ~Kahlil Gibran
They don’t talk about this part.
The hardest part about knowing your worth—after doing the work, setting boundaries, and getting crystal clear on what you want—is the ache.
Not just any ache. The ache of being awake. The ache of knowing. The ache of not settling.
I remember the first time I walked away from someone who didn’t mistreat me but who also didn’t quite meet me. I had spent years unraveling my old patterns: the people-pleasing, the over-giving, the “maybe this is …
How I Found My Midlife Roar in the Beautiful Mess of Perimenopause
“Menopause is a journey where you rediscover yourself and become the woman you were always meant to be.” ~Dr. Christiane Northrup
I recently had a healing session with a dear client of mine.
“Before we begin,” she asked, “how are you?”
I blinked and said, “Oh, you know, the usual. Just navigating perimenopause. Hallucinating about living alone without my partner one minute and panicking about dying alone the next.”
She burst into laughter.
“Oh, thank God,” she said. “I find myself browsing apartment listings weekly. Good to know I’m not the only one.”
Ah, yes, the sacred scrolls of apartment …
When Your Body Is Carrying More Pain Than You Realize
If you live with chronic pain, you already know how exhausting it can be. Not just the physical sensations but the constant trying—trying to push through, trying to find answers, trying to explain something that feels invisible to others. The search for relief can become its own full-time job, and it’s easy to feel discouraged or alone.
Over the years of running this site, I’ve heard from many people who’ve felt trapped in their bodies, like life was happening around them, not with them. I’ve also connected with many people who learned to bury their feelings (a struggle I know …
When Your Body Betrays You: Finding Strength in a New Identity
“The wound is the place where the Light enters you.” ~Rumi
I didn’t know what it meant to grieve a body that was still alive until mine turned on me.
It began like a whisper—fatigue that lingered, strange symptoms that didn’t match, a quiet fear I tried to ignore.
Then one night, I collapsed. I woke up in a hospital room I didn’t recognize, attached to IVs I hadn’t agreed to, surrounded by medical voices that spoke in certainty while I sat in confusion.
It wasn’t just a diagnosis I was given. It was a line in the sand.
Before …
Just Because You See Potential in Another Person…
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The Great Horned Owl That Kicked Me Out of Burnout
“When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be.” ~Lao Tzu
I’d known for months that I was burned out.
The kind of burnout that creeps in quietly—behind your eyes, in your spine, in your calendar. I was volunteering in raptor rescue, monitoring eagle nests as the busy season ramped up, juggling consulting work, supporting adoption placements, writing, creating. I was showing up fully in every space except the one I lived in: my body.
And yet I refused to let go. I told myself it was just a busy season. That if I …
The Hidden Lesson in Projection: It’s Never Really About Us
“What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering.” ~Don Miguel Ruiz
For most of my life, I didn’t fully understand what projection was. I just knew I kept becoming the problem.
I was “too much.” Too intense. Too emotional. Thought too deeply. Spoke too plainly.
Again and again, I was blamed, misunderstood, and cast out for holding up a mirror to things no one wanted to see.
But in my forties, I began doing …
A Quiet but Powerful Shift: How Slowing Down Transformed My Life
“Slow down and enjoy life. It’s not only the scenery you miss by going too fast—you also miss the sense of where you are going and why.” ~Eddie Cantor
In today’s hyper-connected and fast-paced world, slowing down isn’t just rare—it feels almost countercultural.
For years, I tied my identity to productivity. My self-worth hinged on how much I could accomplish in a day, how many boxes I could check. The busier I was, the more valuable I believed myself to be. But that constant need to perform left me mentally and emotionally drained, disconnected not only from others but …
You Don’t Have to Be Strong All the Time
“Sometimes the strongest thing you can do is to ask for help.” ~Unknown
We live in a world that praises strength—especially quiet strength. The kind that shows up, gets things done, and rarely complains. The kind that’s resilient, dependable, productive. But what happens when the strong one quietly breaks inside?
“You are a superwoman!”
“You’re so reliable!”
“You’re the glue that holds everyone together.”
I wore those compliments like badges of honor. For years, I believed them. Not just believed them—I built my identity around them.
I’ve always been a multitasker. A jack of all trades. I managed work, home, …
When the Body Freezes: On Love and Grief in Midlife
“I was constantly seeking a balance between mourning what’s already been lost, making space for the time and moments we still had left, and making sense of this complicated process that felt like my heart was split between two contrasting realities: hope and heartbreak.” ~Liz Newman
There is a quiet heaviness that begins to settle into many of us in midlife.
It doesn’t announce itself with drama. It slips in through unanswered emails from an aging parent, through half-slept nights spent wondering how we will ever afford live-in care, or whether that one fall they had was the beginning …
When Friendship Is One-Sided: Letting Go of Someone Who Was Never Really There
“Finally, I realized that I was never asking too much. I was just asking the wrong person.” ~Unknown
Friendship should nourish the soul. And in my life, for the most part, it has. I have a small, longstanding circle of friends steeped in a long-shared history. We’re basically a real-life, thirty-five-year-long John Hughes film.
However, every now and then, a hornet in disguise has buzzed into my life and stung.
He was one of them. A bad sting.
Love Bombing
Right off the bat, knowing him felt amazing.
I was still reeling from the aftereffects of living with an abusive …
Though I run this site, it is not mine. It's ours. It's not about me. It's about us. Your stories and your wisdom are just as meaningful as mine. 