People Are at War with Themselves
Once You See the Relationship Pattern, You Can’t Unsee It
“When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.” ~Maya Angelou
The weekend started like any other family visit. Our family was in town, and it began with real excitement. Kids running everywhere, chocolate chip muffins in the oven, homemade ice cream for our guests, the ordinary, happy chaos of everyone existing in the same space.
On the second day we noticed one of the visiting kids had a runny nose and was rubbing her snot all over herself as she was grabbing our toddler to hold her. She loves babies, and we adore that about her. …
How a Chronic Illness Changed My Life for the Better
“When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.” ~Viktor Frankl
I smiled when the doctor told me I had a disease I would carry for the rest of my life.
He was calling with my biopsy results, and the word he used was “Crohn’s.” I had no idea what it meant. But after months of pain that no one could explain, hearing an actual name for it felt like someone had finally turned on a light in a dark room. I wasn’t scared. I was relieved.
To understand why, I have to …
Why It’s So Hard to Just Rest and Why We Need to Do It
“If you don’t give your mind and body a break, you’ll break. Stop pushing yourself through pain and exhaustion and take care of your needs.” ~Lori Deschene
In November of 2021, my autoimmune issues flared up. My doctor and I are still unsure which of my conditions—rheumatoid arthritis or fibromyalgia—was the culprit, or if they were acting in cahoots, but the overall achiness and debilitating fatigue were a solid indication that something was more active than usual.
I woke up tired, needed naps, and often ran out of spoons—a phrase familiar to many with chronic conditions, based on a gorgeous …
The Most Helpful Thing Someone Did During My Panic Attack
“Better than a thousand useless words is one useful word, upon hearing which one attains peace.” ~Buddha, Dhammapada
Did he just cut the side of my head open? Am I bleeding out everywhere? Is there blood rushing down my face and onto the floor?
It was the middle of my standard biweekly haircut when my mind suddenly began to spiral.
I felt a slight sting on the side of my head, and my anxiety took over, using its vivid imagination to pivot to the worst-case scenario.
Moments before, my barber and I were laughing about Disneyland. Seconds later, I was …
The Day I Realized Love Couldn’t Save Someone
“When it comes down to it, that’s what life is all about: showing up for the people you love, again and again, until you can’t show up anymore.” ~Rebecca Walker
The first time my dad admitted he was scared, I felt something shift inside me.
Not uncomfortable. Not worried. Scared.
He had recently been diagnosed with Stage IV colorectal cancer, and we were standing together when he quietly asked, “Is this what takes me out?”
I wish I could tell you I responded with wisdom or grace. Instead, I did what many people do when confronted with something they cannot …
