The Best Six Doctors
3 Healthy Love Lessons for Survivors of Trauma and Abuse
“Maybe it’s time for the fighter to be fought for, the holder to be held, and the lover to be loved.” ~Unknown
Growing up, I had no reference whatsoever for what a healthy relationship looked like. My parents had me as a result of an affair. I was estranged from my father for a decade or so, and I spent my childhood with my mother and my stepfather. And both were far from healthy.
I remember vividly this one day they got into a verbal fight. Things got so heated that he angrily threw her a glass of wine at …
How I Ditched Alcohol (Again) and Lost 30 Pounds
“Setbacks are simply reminders.” ~Alison Schuh Hawsey
The nightly wine was back. This time with a vengeance.
It began in late October, when I was happily organizing the bathroom of my new home. The phone rang, and everything changed. My beloved friend/soulmate/ex-boyfriend/twin flame was in the hospital. Three days later, he passed over the veil.
This was also the day I began completely giving up on any continuation of clean eating, drinking, and living. That evening, I downed three dirty martinis on an empty stomach after a long spell of not drinking. Throwing up in my driveway was a …
5 Things to Know When an Abusive Parent Dies
“Family is supposed to be our safe haven. Very often, it’s the place where we find the deepest heartache.” ~Iyanla Vanzant
My brother called me at work on a random Tuesday to say that my mother had suddenly died. Powerful emotions of shock and relief ran through my body, like someone rang a gong right next to me. The war was over.
Like most people with an abusive parent, I had previously wondered how I would feel when my mother died. I was not surprised at the relief, nor that I wasn’t sad.
I did not think about what …
The Problem with Meditating to Become More Productive
“Stress is caused by being ‘here’ but wanting to be ‘there,’ or being in the present but wanting to be in the future.” ~Eckhart Tolle, The Power of Now
I started learning yoga and meditation when I was eighteen years old, in the late nineties, in the car garage of one of the few yoga teachers in Puerto Rico. I took to it like a duck to water.
By the time I was twenty-five, I had spent months on Buddhist silent retreats, living in ashrams in the USA, India, and Burma.
Meditative practices and retreats provided me with great moments …
3 Important Things to Remember When People Are Mean
“Be kind. Be thoughtful. Be genuine. But most of all, be thankful.” ~Unknown
Nobody is spared from being on the receiving end of a mean comment at some point or another. And it’s been said time and time again that allowing a mean person to get under your skin only serves to let them control you. The wiser thing to do is recognize that their comment about you is uninformed and get on with your day.
Still, it’s far easier to know that wisdom than it is to truly feel and live it.
I remember one instance in particular: A …
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