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5 Surefire Signs You Grew Up with an Emotionally Immature Parent
“There’s no such thing as a ‘bad kid’—just angry, hurt, tired, scared, confused, impulsive ones expressing their feelings and needs the only way they know how. We owe it to every single one of them to always remember that.” ~Dr. Jessica Stephens
All children look up to their parents from the moment they enter this world. They have this beautiful, pure, unconditional love pouring out of them. Parents are on a pedestal. They are the ones who know what’s best! They are the grownups showing us how to do life!
We don’t think for one moment that they could be …
Work Is Not Family: A Lesson I Never Wanted but Need to Share
“The paradox of trauma is that it has both the power to destroy and the power to transform and resurrect.” ~Peter Levine
I was sitting in the conference room at work with the CEO and my abusive male boss.
The same boss who had been love-bombing and manipulating me since I started nine months earlier, slowly pushing my nervous system into a constant state of fight-or-flight.
When I was four months into the job, this boss went on a three-day bender during an overnight work conference at a fancy hotel in Boston.
He skipped client meetings or showed up smelling …
Letting Go of the Life You Were Told to Want
“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
Ever since I was about four years old, I knew I was different from the other kids. I was always on the outside looking in. As I approach middle age, I’ve never shaken that feeling—the knowing—of being different.
We live in a noisy world where we find whatever we seek. If we’re looking for validation that we don’t belong, that’s exactly what we’ll find.
While flawed, the standard ‘life blueprint’ hasn’t quite sailed off into …
The Unexpected Therapy I Found on My Phone
“Sometimes you will never know the value of a moment until it becomes a memory.” ~Dr. Seuss
The notification pops up on my phone: “Jason, we made a new memory reel for you.” I pause whatever I’m doing, probably something stressful involving deadlines or dishes, and feel that familiar flutter of excitement. What chapter of my life has Google decided to surprise me with today?
I tap the notification, and suddenly I’m watching years of Father’s Day adventures unfold. It started accidentally—one Father’s Day trip to the Buffalo Zoo that somehow became our tradition. Instead of buying me something I …
The Prowler in My Mind: Learning to Live with Depression
“There is a crack in everything, that’s how the light gets in.” ~Leonard Cohen
When depression comes, I feel it like a prowler gliding through my body. My chest tightens, my head fills with dark whispers, and even the day feels like night. The prowler has no face, no clear shape, but its presence is heavy. Sometimes it circles in silence within me. Other times it presses in until I don’t know how to respond.
In those moments, I feel caught between two choices: do I lie still, hoping it passes by, or do I rise and face it? Often, …
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