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Category “love & relationships”

My Life Will Be My Message

“Thousands of candles can be lighted from a single candle, and the life of the candle will not be shortened. Happiness never decreases by being shared.” ~Gautama Buddha

I have meditated for over half my life. It didn’t always look …

Why I Now Complain Less and Appreciate More

 “It is not happy people who are thankful. It is thankful people who are happy.” ~Unknown

I used to be a complainer, a fault-finder, a grumbler. I would grumble a hundred times a day about mundane issues, be it the …

How to Fight Well in Your Relationship

“Raise your words, not your voice. It is rain that grows flowers, not thunder.” ~Rumi

I had one of those really intense arguments with my partner recently, and it made me realize the importance of knowing how to fight well …

Confrontation Can Be Hard, But It’s Worth It

“When we can talk about our feelings, they become less overwhelming, less upsetting, and less scary.” ~Fred Rogers

I was immediately uncomfortable when the older gentleman rode up on his bike and loudly told us that our kids shouldn’t be …

Why I’m Trying Harder to Be Kind to Strangers

“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.” ~Leo Buscaglia

From …

When Someone You Love Is Grieving: How to Really Help

The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing and face with

Why My Abuse Is No Longer a Secret

“You own everything that happened to you. Tell your stories. If people wanted you to write warmly about them, they should have behaved better.” ~Anne Lamott

To say I had a tough life would be a gross understatement. Growing up …

The Best Thing to Say to Someone Who Won’t Understand You

“True love is born from understanding.” ~Buddha

I believe one of our strongest desires in life is to feel understood.

We want to know that people see our good intentions and not only get where we’re coming from but get …

From the Spouse of a Narcissist: Here’s What You Need to Know

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“You can recognize survivors of abuse by their courage. When silence is so very inviting, they step forward and share their truth so others know they aren’t alone.” ~Jeanne McElvaney, Healing Insights: Effects of Abuse for Adults Abused as

Why Speaking My Truth Is the Cornerstone of My Recovery

“When I loved myself enough, I began leaving whatever wasn’t healthy. This meant people, jobs, my own beliefs and habits—anything that kept me small. My judgment called it disloyal. Now I see it as self-loving.” ~Kim McMillen

I like to …

Why My Grandfather Was Happy Even When He Was Dying

“It’s not the events of our lives that shape us, but our beliefs as to what those events mean.” ~Tony Robbins

Is there anyone in your past that inspired you to become the person you are today? For me, that …

How I’m Mothering the Wounded Kid Inside Who Just Wanted Love

“Bless the daughters who sat carrying the trauma of mothers. Who sat asking for more love and not getting any, carried themselves to light. Bless the daughters who raised themselves.” ~Questions for Ada by Ijeoma Umebinyuo

“I failed you…”

My …

How to Recognize Painful Emotional Triggers and Stop Reacting in Anger

“Where there is anger, there is always pain underneath.” ~ Eckhart Tolle

There I was again, regretting the spiteful words that had cascaded out of my mouth during a heated argument with my partner.

I felt that old familiar feeling, …

How to Replace Body-Hate with Self-Compassion

“Loving yourself is the greatest revolution.” ~Unknown

I’ve spent most of my life struggling with my weight and trying desperately to fit the idealistic image of beauty that our culture celebrates.

As a young teen, I was obsessed with magazines …

9 Easy Ways You Can Speak Your Truth Today

“We are constantly invited to be who we are.” ~Henry David Thoreau

When your circumstances invite you to present your true self to others, do you accept the invitation?

I think of authentic communication as sharing the unfiltered essence of …

It’s Not “Failing” to Leave a Toxic, Abusive Marriage

“Forgive yourself for not knowing better at the time. Forgive yourself for giving away your power. Forgive yourself for past behaviors. Forgive yourself for the survival patterns and traits you picked up while enduring trauma. Forgive yourself for being who

How I Stopped Feeling So Lonely and Disconnected

If I were given the chance to relive my childhood, I wouldn’t take it. For the most part, those were times I’d rather forget. I didn’t get along well in school, and family life was less than ideal. About the …

Find Your “Rat People”: The Best Advice for People-Pleasers

Deadly Women. I like Deadly Women.

Allow me to rephrase: I don’t have an affinity for murderous ladies, and I’m also not a fan of murder as a practice. I am decidedly pro-loving people and anti-killing them. And …

How to Break Painful Relationship Patterns

“Until you heal your past, your life patterns and relationships will continue to be the same; it’s just the faces that change.” ~Unknown

First of all: honey, you are not broken. We are all works in process. There is nothing

How to Stop Punishing Yourself for Your Breakup

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“The most difficult times for many of us are the ones we give ourselves.” ~Pema Chodron

After you come out a meaningful relationship that you didn’t foresee ending, you begin to think about everything you did wrong.

If you were …