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Category “letting go”

How to Let Go of the Need to Control People and Life

“Anything you can’t control is teaching you how to let go.” ~Jackson Kiddard

Fellow perfectionists, I’m guessing you know what it’s like: the constant need to control life and other people to ensure everything goes smoothly and everyone’s okay.

It’s …

The Joy of Not Getting What We Want

“Remember that not getting what you want Is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck.” ~Dalai Lama

Let me tell you a story. I first read it in a book on Taoism, but I’ve seen it in at least a dozen …

8 Ways to Stop Worrying About What Other People Think of You

“You can’t force anyone to value, respect, understand, or support you, but you can choose to spend your time around people who do.” ~Lori Deschene

It can be paralyzing.

The worry about what other people think about you, I mean. …

4 Things to Let Go if You Want to Enjoy Life More This Year

As we start a new year, many of us focus on the physical things we want to gain—a new job, new house, more money, or six-pack abs, for example. We think about everything that might enhance our lives and create …

Healing from the Conflicting Loss of a Difficult Parent

“Deep grief sometimes is almost like a specific location, a coordinate on a map of time. When you are standing in that forest of sorrow, you cannot imagine that you could ever find your way to a better place. But

If You Expect a Lot and You’re Tired of Being Disappointed

“Letting go gives us freedom, and freedom is the only condition for happiness. If, in our heart, we still cling to anything—anger, anxiety, or possessions—we cannot be free.” ~Thich Nhat Hanh

Almost universally, many of the problems we face in …

4 Reasons to Let Go of the Need to Plan Your Future

“No valid plans for the future can be made by those who have no capacity for living in the now.” ~Alan Watts

I went to college a little bit later in life. Because of that, people often mistakenly believed I …

Tips from a Former Addict: How I Made a Change for Good

I was a drug addict. Yes, I did it all. No, my childhood was not full of abuse, I was actually a pretty lucky kid, and I had it no worse and no better than anyone else, except for maybe …

3 Ways Decluttering Can Help You Accept Yourself

“I now see how owning our story and loving ourselves through that process is the bravest thing that we will ever do.” ~Brené Brown

I had just squeezed all my possessions into a jumbo-sized moving van and relocated to a …

Dear Estranged Adult: You Are Strong and Worthy of Love

Dear estranged adult,

What I want you to remember is that it was never really about you, although it might have felt like it at the time and it might feel that way now.

When your parents told you over …

Flip the Script: How to Overcome Your Negative Thoughts

“You can’t stop negative thoughts from popping into your head, but you can choose to stop letting them control you and your life.” ~Lori Deschene

Some of us are more prone to negative thoughts. They start out subtle and …

How Resentment Affects Your Health and How to Forgive

“If one by one we counted people out for the least sin, it wouldn’t take us long to get so we had no one left to live with. For to be social is to be forgiving.” ~Robert Frost 

There …

How to Befriend Our Unhealthy Survival Mechanisms

“Wounded children have a rage, a sense of failed justice that burns in their souls. What do they do with that rage? Since they would never harm another, they turn that rage inward. They become the target of their own

Why It’s Okay Not to Have Everything Under Control

“Relax. Nothing is under control.” ~Adi Da Samraj

This has been an incredibly difficult, stressful, and uncertain year for me, as it has been for most people.

If I was told a year ago that in 2020, my work hours …

5 Things I Let Go When I Was Tired of Playing the Victim

“Placing the blame or judgment on someone else leaves you powerless to change your experience; taking responsibility for your beliefs and judgment gives you the power to change them.” ~ Byron Katie

I will never forget the day a dear …

Do You Remember When You Didn’t Worry About Your Weight?

“We need to start focusing on what matters—on how we feel, and how we feel about ourselves.” ~Michelle Obama

Do you remember the little girl (or boy) in you? The kid who ran, jumped, danced, laughed anywhere and everywhere they …

How to Calm Morning Anxiety by Mindfully Drinking Tea

“Mindfulness isn’t difficult. We just need to remember to do it.” ~Sharon Salzberg

As a Brit, I do what we British people do best: drink tea. Lots of it.

I’ve drunk a cup of tea every morning since I was …

Sorry If I “Trigger” You, But I Will Never Move On

“It’s so much darker when a light goes out than it would have been if it had never shone.” ~John Steinbeck

When you lose someone close to you, there are a plethora of duties you must first complete.

When my …

When Self-Help Hurts: How My Obsession Kept Me Stuck

“Quiet the voice telling you to do more and be more, and trust that in this moment, who you are, where you are at, and what you are doing is enough. You will get to where you need to be

When You Feel Bad About Feeling Sad and Anxious

“You don’t have to be brave all of the time. You are not damaged or defeated. Have patience. Give yourself permission to grieve, to cry, and to heal. Allow a bit of compassion, you’re doing the best you can. We