The Version They Had the Most Power Over
How to Stop Prioritizing Everyone and Everything Else at Your Own Expense
“Agreeing to things just to keep the peace is actually a trauma response. When you do this you’re disrespecting your boundaries. No more making yourself uncomfortable for others to feel comfortable. You have control now. You run your life. Take up space and use your voice.” ~Dj Love Light
I read the text from my stepmother inviting everyone to the holiday dinner at her house, and my stomach began to churn. I did not want to attend, but I was instantly flooded with guilt at the thought of saying no.
“How to kindly decline an invite” I typed and hit …
Rethinking Productivity: Less Hustle, More Harmony, More Energy
“The flame that burns twice as bright burns half as long.” ~Lao Tzu
I can hear the voices now:
“You should be disappointed in yourself” (for not taking the SATs in seventh grade).
“Don’t be lazy like [fill in a not-so-studious sibling/cousin]!”
“You need to work harder or else you’ll fall behind.”
“Always be analyzing, analyzing, analyzing!”
“We need to improve our operational efficiency or ELSE.” Or else what?
My mind became a boiling stew of negative self-talk, heavy thoughts, and beliefs that didn’t serve me. Throughout my entire life, from an immigrant Asian family to corporate leaders fixated on
If You Haven’t Found Your Purpose: How to Feel Good Anyway
“The person who lives life fully, glowing with life’s energy, is the person who lives a successful life.” ~Daisaku Ikeda
We’ve all heard the phrase “find your life purpose.” It gets thrown around so much nowadays. Many of us have been in what feels like an eternal quest to find it, especially if we’ve been feeling stuck, lost, and out of alignment. Finding our purpose then becomes an almost obsessive search for the solution that will solve all our problems.
We’ve been led to believe that a life purpose is a single thing, a calling that we’ll be passionate about…
How to Start Saying No When You’re Afraid of Disapproval
“Sometimes what you’re most afraid of doing is the very thing that will set you free.” ~Robert Tew
When I say that my need for people to like me has been one of the hidden rulers of my life, I’m not kidding!
Ever since I was a kid, I wanted everyone to like me, and I had significant anxiety if they didn’t. My fear of the disapproval of others quietly lurked beneath the surface like a shadow under my skin, dictating my behavior and my mood.
I was so afraid of the disapproval of others that I would ruminate over …
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