Posts tagged with “surrender”
The Hidden Cost of Trusting the Universe More Than Yourself
“You are not a drop in the ocean. You are the entire ocean in a drop.” —Rumi
The last days of the year felt like the right time to let go. I stood in my backyard with twenty-five years of journals—thick notebooks filled with prayers, confessions, and late-night spirals—ready to release them to the flames.
I wasn’t being dramatic. I was being deliberate. I stopped daily journaling several years ago.
For years, I’d used these journals as a kind of inner courtroom, constantly building a case against myself or others. Every page held evidence of failures, proof of my profoundly …
How I Found Peace When Everything Suddenly Felt Out of My Control
“That which does not kill us makes us stronger.” ~Friedrich Nietzsche
I was twenty-five weeks pregnant when I was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes. Still working, still showing up, still dreaming of a gentle homebirth.
We had an event at work that day, and I had to walk to it. I remember feeling so out of breath that I had to stop every few steps. Walking upstairs became impossible without pausing. Something wasn’t right.
I’d also noticed I was losing weight, especially in my face. My cheeks had sunken in. Not exactly the glowing pregnancy look I’d envisioned. More “heroin …
Finding Peace When You Don’t Know What Comes Next
“Sometimes letting things go is an act of far greater power than defending or hanging on.” ~Eckhart Tolle
For as long as I can remember, I’ve been the kind of person who plans everything.
My calendar was color-coded, my to-do lists perfectly alphabetized, and I could tell you what I’d be doing six months from now almost down to the hour.
I thought control meant safety. If I could organize my world tightly enough, maybe nothing bad would happen.
For a long time, that illusion worked. I graduated near the top of my class, got a good job, and built …
When You Stop Forcing, Life Flows
“You don’t have to force the flow—sometimes your only job is to soften and let go.” ~Unknown
For most of my life, I was obsessed with getting everything right. Planning. Controlling. Anticipating every outcome so I wouldn’t be caught off guard. I saw life as a kind of puzzle: if I just made the right moves in the right order, I’d get what I wanted. Peace, success, love.
But life doesn’t work that way.
The more I tried to control it, the more I felt out of alignment. I would burn out trying to make things happen. When something went …
From Injury to Insight: A New Kind of Yoga Practice
“Healing may not be so much about getting better, as about letting go of everything that isn’t you—all of the expectations, all of the beliefs—and becoming who you are.” ~Rachel Naomi Remen
For years, yoga was my safe space—the place where I felt strong, grounded, and whole. My practice wasn’t just physical; it was my sanctuary, my moving meditation. So, when a shoulder injury forced me to change the way I practiced, I wasn’t just in pain—I was lost.
At first, it seemed minor. A nagging soreness, nothing I hadn’t worked through before. I convinced myself that more movement would …
What Happened When I Let Go of My Big Plan
“Surrender to what is. Let go of what was. Have faith in what will be.” ~Sonia Ricotti
Turning fifty felt like a milestone worth celebrating—a time to honor myself, reflect on my five decades of life, and embrace the journey ahead.
For someone who had never believed I was worth the fuss of a big celebration, choosing to honor myself in this way felt like a profound shift. I wanted this celebration to affirm that I am worth the effort and expense.
The way I envisioned this milestone? Hosting a retreat for women like me, who were born in 1975 …
3 Life-Changing Insights for Control Freaks (Lessons from an Ant Infestation)
“Freedom is what you do with what’s been done to you.” ~Jean-Paul Sartre
“So did you figure out what your shadow totem is?”
This was the first thing out of my husband’s friend’s mouth as I sat down to dinner at a local downtown restaurant, across from my husband and a couple friends we were meeting up with.
I laughed at the choice of question but then paused with wide eyes and replied, “YES, I DID! Oh my gosh. It’s an ant!”
The backstory is that we had previously had a conversation about animal symbolism, and how figuring out …
How Releasing Control Opened Me Up to a Limitless Life
“What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the master calls a butterfly.” ~Richard Bach
I have always wanted to create a family.
As a child, I lovingly cared for my dolls and fell head over heels for my college boyfriend. Kneeling before me with a ring, he said, “I want you to be the mother of our children.” I swooned as we walked down the aisle at the tender age of twenty-two, convinced I was set for life. I had the husband, and I would have the family.
I entered into our marriage with the expectation and security …
5 Life Lessons from a Brain Tumor That Could Have Killed Me
“Life is a balance between what we can control and what we cannot. I am learning to live between effort and surrender.” ~Danielle Orner
I was slumped against a wall at Oxford Circus Station early one Sunday evening when an irritated male voice suddenly barked, “MOVE!”
Moments beforehand, I had lost my vision.
Without conscious thought, I muttered, “RUDE!” and staggered off without clearly seeing where I was going.
It was only months later, on retracing my steps at Oxford Circus, that I realized I’d been blocking his view of some street art.
I’d allowed a guy to bully me …
Surrendering Isn’t Giving Up: Why We Need to Accept What’s Happened
“The first step toward change is awareness. The second step is acceptance.” ~Nathaniel Branden
I remember the last time I saw him before my world crumbled. I held up my hand with the ASL sign for “I love you” through the window to him as he mouthed the words back and got in his car to leave for work. I found out an hour later that he—my fiancé—had begun cheating on me a month before he had proposed.
He never fought for me. Even during the course of our relationship, when he would run away due to his insecurities, I …
How I Stopped Carrying the Weight of the World and Started Enjoying Life
“These mountains that you are carrying, you were only supposed to climb.” ~Najwa Zebian
During a personal development course, one of my first assignments was to reach out to three friends and ask them to list my top three qualities. It was to help me see myself the way others saw me.
At the time, my confidence was low and I couldn’t truly see myself. I didn’t remember who I was or what I wanted. The assignment was a way to rebuild my self-esteem and see myself from a broader perspective.
As I vulnerably asked and then received the responses, …
Confessions of an Extrovert: Why I Now Love My Alone Time
“Allow yourself to grow and change. Your future self is waiting.” -Unknown
Not to be dramatic, but I really mean it when I say that solitude changed my life. I am an extrovert who loves humans, socializing, and learning from people and experiences. I’ve always enjoyed being around others, and don’t get me wrong, I still thrive this way. But when I got Covid in 2021, life completely changed, and it’s not the only way I thrive now.
Before Covid, I’d been living my life in a way that wasn’t serving me. I was partying a lot, not eating …
How I Find the Courage to Keep Jumping (Even Though the Net Never Catches Me)
“The future never comes. Life is always now.” ~Eckhart Tolle
“Jump, and the net will catch you.” “Leap, and the net will appear.”
This piece of writing is to make a case for the following argument: there is NO net.
Before I put forward my reasoning, please bear with me for a moment while my ego rattles off the times I have jumped (but the net never appeared).
- I quit my well-paid marketing role and traveled across the world to pursue a humanitarian dream job. I failed at the job interview and was jobless and in despair in a foreign
How a Simple Action Word Can Guide You Through Even the Hardest Days
“Our intention creates our reality.” ~Wayne Dyer
What if you only had one thing you needed to accomplish today? One over-arching objective that encapsulates the multiple items on your to-do list or the meetings on your calendar? One word that you set in the morning and carry throughout the day to stay in focus and on purpose?
Actors know that in order to convey a story well, they have to play an action versus an emotion. There has to be a verb involved in order to act. This might include something like provoke, seduce, destroy, or flatter, versus trying to …
How I Saved Myself by Surrendering When Everything Fell Apart
“And here you are, living despite it all.” ~Rupi Kaur
“I surrender!” I said this mantra out loud as my life was spiraling out of control.
I had spent a summer in college as a camp counselor separated from my fiancé. He sent me no letters and did not keep in touch. Still, I held on. By the time I came back home, we were broken. I had also realized he was emotionally abusing me. It took that separation to make me see it.
I realized I had been truly alone in the relationship. I was never lonelier than …
How to Make Everything Easier by Accepting the Present Moment
“The power of now can only be realized now. It requires no time and effort. Effort means you’re trying hard to get somewhere and so you are not present, welcoming this moment as it is.” ~Eckhart Tolle
Eight years ago, I was very depressed. I wanted nothing more than to stop feeling this way and dreamed of escaping my body. I had struggled with depression for many years, and I was terrified that I might feel that way forever.
Someone recommended I do a mindfulness-based course. This turned out to be the one of the most helpful parts of my …
4 Reasons to Let Go of the Need to Plan Your Future
“No valid plans for the future can be made by those who have no capacity for living in the now.” ~Alan Watts
I went to college a little bit later in life. Because of that, people often mistakenly believed I was operating on a specific (and somewhat urgent) timetable—as though I was running to catch up with the rest of the people my age.
However, I was already in a career I loved (teaching yoga) that supported me financially. For me, going back to school was mainly about enjoying the process of getting an education without any pressure to get …
Why It’s Okay Not to Have Everything Under Control
“Relax. Nothing is under control.” ~Adi Da Samraj
This has been an incredibly difficult, stressful, and uncertain year for me, as it has been for most people.
If I was told a year ago that in 2020, my work hours as a healthcare professional would be reduced, I would be quarantined for months in a small one-bedroom apartment with my boyfriend of seven months, I’d gain fifteen pounds in a few months, and I wouldn’t be able to travel to other countries, I would have rolled my eyes, laughed in disbelief, and thought to myself whoever is delivering this information …
How to Open Your Eyes and Make the Most of Life
“The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes.” ~Marcel Proust
I was asleep for the first thirty-two years of my life. I was jolted awake when my daughter was born unable to sustain her own breath.
I sat beside her in the NICU helplessly every day for three months, unable to hold or feed her due to her fragility. I watched as she endured two surgeries before six weeks of age.
She was diagnosed with a rare muscular disease that required significant medical intervention and around-the-clock nursing care. In those first few …
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