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Posts tagged with “wisdom”

The “If, Then” Trap: How It Keeps You Unhappy and How to Avoid It

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“Happiness is the absence of striving for happiness.” ~Chuang Tzu

Being an empty nester (the kids have grown up and left home), I noticed recently that I have fallen in love with little kids again.

After going through all the kid stages, and surviving them (most notably the teenage years), I took a long kid moratorium. Skiing, mountain biking, traveling, gardening, and reading—all filled to the brim with a commodity I had forgotten about: time just for me.

Now, unexpectedly, they’re back! Exhausting, enchanting, and a source of endless inspiration.

A few doors down to the west I have new …

10 Life-Changing Lessons I Wish I Learned Sooner

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“Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow.” ~Albert Einstein

I recently turned thirty-eight.

Birthdays and new years always make me quite reflective and, for a long time, critical about my achievements—what I’ve done and what I have to show for it.

This time, though, there was finally a wonderful difference.

Over the past twelve months what’s mattered has been about the people I’ve met, the places I’ve seen, the experiences I’ve had, and the things I’ve discovered about myself—none of which have brought me anything physical to show for it.

I’ve learned character building life lessons, the kind …

Reflections: A Touching Performance from Two Young Sisters

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Quincy and Gracie Latkovski share a passion for dancing, but they do it in two very different ways: one in ballet slippers, and one in a wheelchair. They performed this moving dance as part of 2013 WHAS Crusade for Children telethon. Just like these talented sisters, it’s both beautiful and inspiring!

Don’t Give Up

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Source: 9gag.com

When You Feel Down or Stuck: How to Effectively Be What You’re Not

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“Success is achieved by developing our strengths, not eliminating our weaknesses.” ~Marilyn vos Savant

I often hear the words “be yourself.” I love those words, and I truly believe that everyone should strive to be the truest version of who they are. There’s nothing more attractive than a person who is just so utterly themselves, even when society tries to push them the other way.

Strong willed people are some of my favorite types. They can be righteous. They can be overly moral. However, they know what they want, they know who they are, and they know that nobody else …

Setting Emotional Boundaries: Stop Taking on Other People’s Feelings

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“The way you treat yourself sets the standard for others.” ~Sonya Friedman

The longer I stayed on the phone, the more agitated I became. My mother was on the other end, as usual, dumping her emotions on me. I had moved to Los Angeles for graduate school in part to escape all of this—my mother’s unhappiness, my sense of responsibility, the pressure to be perfect.

When I hung up the phone, I felt an overwhelming sense of anger. At the time, I could not (correction: would not) allow myself to admit that I was angry with my mother. I …

The Person Your Heart Dreams of Being

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Source: NotSalmon.com

Are You Holding Yourself Back with a Story About the Past?

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“The distinction between the past, present, and future is only a stubbornly persistent illusion.” ~Albert Einstein 

One morning I woke up inexplicably sad. I sat on my bed trying to make sense of how I felt and what could be behind it. Intuitively, I grabbed one of the many books lying on my night table and opened it in a random place.

What I had in my hands was A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life’s Purpose by Eckhart Tolle, and the chapter was called “Breaking Free.”

Tolle explains how we tend to be unconsciously engaged in stories from the …

Owning Our Stories: Overcoming The Fears That Make Us Play Small

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“I now see how owning our story and loving ourselves through that process is the bravest thing that we will ever do.” ~Brené Brown

It’s taken me a long time to figure out my story.

I kept thinking, “Nothing particularly dramatic has happened to me, so how can I have a story?”

Yet recently, after years of personal growth work, that’s shifted. I see the golden thread that weaves through my story and what that means for how I show up and what I bring to the world.

I now see that this whole thing about owning your story …

How Relationship Issues Can Lead to Growth (and Why It’s a Daily Process)

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“When something bad happens you have three choices. You can let it define you, let it destroy you, or you can let it strengthen you.” ~Unknown

Relationships are tough. Even more difficult is maintaining healthy boundaries within a relationship.

My head hurts and I feel like I’m going to throw up. Let me explain. I’m in a loving, healthy relationship with a beautiful woman, and I’m proud to call her my partner.

Great, so why do I feel like I want to throw up? Well, because last night was a tough night for us, for me, and today I have …

Life Isn’t a Race: Allow Yourself to Be Happy in the Present

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“Happiness is the absence of striving for happiness.”  ~Chuang Tzu

At an early age I learned that nothing in life is guaranteed. When I was eleven years old, a close friend and classmate lost his battle with cancer. After that, I had several more instances of losing loved ones, some expected, others not so much.

After having gone through so much loss at such an early age, my outlook on life was one word: rushed.

I wanted to get through college as fast as I could, while taking on as much as I could. I wanted to have …

Buddha Doodles: Home Is Wherever You Are

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Source: Buddha Doodles

Change Your Life by Changing Your Mind About Yourself

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“The way you treat yourself sets the standard for others.” ~Sonya Friedman

I’d had enough.

Once again, I’d sent follow-up emails to guys who had shown interest in my dating site profile. Once again, I’d included full-length photos with those emails, unlike the headshot that went along with my online profile.

And once again, days later, my inbox was a virtual ghost town.

Didn’t these guys know how much courage it took for me to set up a profile in the first place? I was twenty-six years old and been on fewer than a dozen dates in my life—including my …

5 Tips to Accept Your Imperfections, No Matter How Different You Feel

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“I follow four dictates: face it, accept it, deal with it, then let it go.” ~Sheng Yen

Growing up different isn’t easy for anyone.

I was born normal, happy, and healthy. I had five fingers and five toes. I reached all my developmental milestones and showed promise as a vivacious, energetic child. It all changed when I was ten months old.

I became violently ill with bacterial meningitis. I battled the infection with a strength I was naturally graced with at birth. One week into my hospital stay, I was finally able to lift my head; two weeks later, I …

You Are Enough (Even if You’re Not in a Relationship)

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Tamara Levitt, the talented writer and illustrator who brought us the inspiring video Ode to Failure, has created another uplifting short film about being single. If you’ve ever felt that you’re lacking because you’re not in a relationship, this one’s for you!

6 Things to Do When You Feel Small and Insignificant

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“Tough times never last, but tough people do.” ~Robert Schuller

On nights when the stars shine bright in the Arizona desert, I remember to tell myself to pay attention to the universe’s handiwork. From space, the Earth is a mere speck in the galaxy. I am humbled by this knowing, by my smallness. I call it my Ratatouille moment.

Ratatouille is an animated movie that tells a story of a dreamer, a remarkable rat named Remy, who aspires to be a chef. Emerging from the sewers one day, Remy was shown a different vantage point of the city.

To his …

What to Do When You Feel Caged: The Key to Lasting Freedom

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“Wherever you go, there you are.” ~Confucius

Everything I do is about living and sharing freedom. But what is freedom anyway?

To understand freedom, it’s helpful to understand its opposite. The opposite of freedom is feeling caged, constricted, and ruled by guidelines you don’t believe in.

For many people, their job feels like jail. For some people, their community feels like jail. For others, school feels like jail.

I’ve been in all those jails. And for the most part, I was in those jails because I didn’t know there was an alternative. Now that I know the alternative, I have …

Where Happiness Comes From

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A Letter from Your Future Self

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“The place to be happy is here. The time to be happy is now.” ~Robert G. Ingersoll

Dear Past Me,

Remember that day when you thought all was lost? When you thought there was barely any point in carrying on?

The bank account was dangerously low.

You were arguing with everyone close to you.

The roof was leaking.

It felt like everything was a struggle and the so-called abundance of the Universe was nowhere to be seen.

You were going over the mistakes you’d made.

The money you had lost.

The opportunities you had missed.

You were going over angry …

Stop Attracting Unhealthy Relationships: 3 Promises to Make to Yourself

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“When you stop trying to change others and work on changing yourself, your world changes for the better.”  ~Unknown

For years, I was entering relationships with men where I saw their potential to be a good match for me, if only they would completely change who they were.

For twelve years, it was the same pattern until one day I finally realized something was broken.

After my last unsuccessful relationship, where I was just holding on, hoping he would change and be the person I wanted him to be, I had had enough. So, I took a much-needed hiatus to …