Dear Anita,

Yeah, I named him. I’ve had a 1984 W123 Merc when I was 18.. It was my second car. First car was a Dacia which I’ve modified to go racing on the street. Such crazy years those were… Then, I thought I had my life ahead of me.. And I did. That’s still true today I guess.. but the feeling has changed. Now I just want some peace :))

I know a thing or two about the effects of alcohol on my social life. When I was living in Spain the majority of my social interactions were lubricated by alcohol. I felt good when drinking, I was less inhibited and didn’t feel self conscious. Then there was ecstasy. That happened on occasion.. whenever I would go to a bigger party with some friends and someone had some. That was just.. next level of connectedness. Then I felt truly complete.. as if everything is perfectly aligned. I felt full acceptance for everything and everyone. But I guess I’ve never cherished that feeling enough to get into regular use of any drugs.. I just saw it for what it was. I do miss those things sometimes. Its been years since I’ve done anything like that.

Alcohol has been always around in my life… when I was 13 I got into a coma because of drinking too much alcohol ( believe it or not…) It was kind of an accident.. I didn’t know I could almost die from drinking a few glasses of home made vodka. I ended up in the hospital – I was pretty lucky.
Have I learned my lesson?
No. Course not. Later on in my late teens I was getting drunk at parties, later on in Uni.. and well.. Spain… There I got completely immersed into the realm of alcoholic beverages. I began to develop more sophisticated preferences and got more into wine… but during the pandemic I took a good break from it. I always known I was drinking a little too much and felt pretty drained the next day. So.. pandemic was good. Pandemic was real good. I started eating well, working out and stopped drinking.
After that alcohol has become a every now and then kinda thing… I even had long breaks.. like months without alcohol. Now I fine tuned a little.. Now I have a glass or 2 every now and then when I’m in good company.. but that’s about it. Same goes for cigarettes.

For a while I identified with the image of a non alcoholic person who takes care of his body and does only healthy stuff. And.. yea.. it kinda felt good.. but I also felt bored. That was just some bullshit spiritual ego. I guess all is good in smaller measures..
I make wine with my dad every year.. we have some grapevine and we make a decent quantity of red wine. Its pretty good.. that’s what I’m drinking these days… Well.. once a week or so..

Ah yea.. u asked me about the cafe bistro thing..
Yes.. I’d very much like to own my own a place like that. I’d like to design it myself.. and I’d like to always play nice music in the background. Some days I’d like to do House or Balearic Chillout Dj sets there.. as background music. Yea.. that would be pretty nice 🙂 I’d channel my passion for sound and esthetics into a place that could serve a good place for community building.. Yea that sounds alright..

How are u today?