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- This topic has 150 replies, 6 voices, and was last updated 4 days, 17 hours ago by
anita.
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May 23, 2026 at 11:13 am #458120
anitaParticipantGood Saturday East Coast Saturday morning, Thomas 👋
As you know, it’s been very slow in the forums, and like you, I wish more people would visit and interact here 🙏
I wanted to bring up your thread to the top of Page 1 of list of topics.
✨️🌿✨️ Anita
May 23, 2026 at 6:21 pm #458121anitaParticipant* Edit: Good Saturday afternoon, East Coast; Saturday morning, West coast.
Well, now it’s 9:21 pm your time 🙂
May 23, 2026 at 7:41 pm #458122
Thomas168ParticipantYeah, people get busy and come and go. It would be nice to hear from them and maybe get a few new voices hear. Still very concerned about Laven. Hope she is doing better. As I believe I said, I don’t think you are doing anything to disrupt the forum. Just that all the older topics and posts seem to rule when you bring them all back. It could be a good thing to raise them back up. Maybe someone needs to see a sign? I don’t know. Anyway, you do you cause I know it comes from the heart. Wish you well.
May 23, 2026 at 8:16 pm #458123anitaParticipantThank you, Thomas, for wishing me well and for saying I’m not doing anything to disrupt the forums.
I too hope that Laven is okay 🙏
I too wish more people participated in the forums. I think that what has been happening is that although millions (!) of people are coming across the tiny buddha’s blogs, advertisements, etc. (what you see on the “home page”), hardly ANYONE knows that the forums even exist-
Because the millions read what you see on the home page- not here, on the tb website- but on Facebook, Instagram and other social media outlets (as feeds, pieces of what you see on the home page). These forums don’t appear on the social media feeds.
I think that in the beginning lots of people posted in the forums because they logged into the website like you and I do, but over the years, hardly anyone does.
So the forums are in reality, tiny buddha’s tiny secret 😔
So, old participants in the forums stop posting over time (that’s normal), but unlike in the past, new people don’t join us because they don’t even know about the forums, and they’re busy communicating with each other- not on any particular website’s forums, but on social media.
Websites’ forum participation is a thing of the past 😔
At this point, I am bringing up really old threads so to learn from them, to see how I used to reply to members and why, it’s about my desire to learn about how I changed and am changing since I first participated here in May 2015.
I thought of sharing all the above because it may interest you, or explain things. Does it?
✨️🌿✨️ Anita
May 26, 2026 at 3:08 pm #458170
AlessaParticipantHi Tommy
Bless your soul! It’s nice to be missed. 🫂
Things have slowed down for me finally and gotten less stressful. It was wild for a bit there.
How are you and your family doing? 🩵
I understand what you mean with the forum. It is the nature of the website to push older items to the next page. I think in busier periods some messages have been missed because of that. 🩵
May 26, 2026 at 8:57 pm #458177Thomas168ParticipantHello Alessa,
Truly missed you. Was hoping everything is still okay. Hope your people are healthy, happy and safe. Yeah, daughter went to graduation. Helping her with transferring to a 4 year college after 2 year community college. All to finish 4 years of college and begin looking for a teaching job. Then later must complete her masters to stay a teacher. I am really proud of her. And I let her know it.
The wife and I are in the aftermath of a verbal disagreement about who does more work. And of course, I backed down and apologized. I keep the peace. Doesn’t matter who is right. I just want peace. After a little while things will cool off. Life will return to peace.
So, how is the baby? Growing up too fast? Day care? Do you read to him? Show him the words and read? Well, I hope all is good.
May 30, 2026 at 12:08 pm #458262
RobertaParticipantHi Thomas
It is the start of our holiday season on our little island. I had friends stay with me for 5 days, 2 came for a day trip & then a long & slightly lost cousin turned up with his family for a reunion so our grandchildren could meet for the first time. Plus extra shifts with both my jobs.
I just get confused when old threads are reactivated., But funnily enough I got a phone call on Thursday by someone who had been looking for my meditation sessions & found my number on a very old website about our island, so we met up today & did a wonderful loving kindness meditation.
Off shortly for a sunset walk with a dear friend who visits the island every couple of month or so.
Hope deep peace returns to you & your wife’s relationshipMay 31, 2026 at 4:06 pm #458277Thomas168ParticipantHello Roberta,
Wow, that sounds so nice. People stopping by to hang out. Meeting relatives for day trip. Meeting new people for a kindness meditation, sounds ideal. When I see very old topics or posts, it makes me not want to post cause the topic is either too long or too old to be of concern to even the original poster. Sorry, that is just me. Then there is the fact that old posts push the new ones down and they disappear. So don’t even see the current posts. Then don’t bother to look for it. Still I understand Anita reasons for doing that. Can’t criticize or be overly judgy.
Peace with my wife is like a tsunami at the beach. Tempers flair and then when it passes, the wreckage is vast. Later things get back to normal. Marriage isn’t all wine and roses. Maybe I need a drink. Haven’t had one in a long time. Oh, my meditation comes and goes with the peace in my family. Sometimes good and sometimes lacking. But, thanks for the well wishes.
May 31, 2026 at 6:53 pm #458279anitaParticipantDear Thomas:
I care about you feeling visible here in the tiny buddha forums. I care about you feeling that you matter and that you are heard.
What would it take for you to feel heard by me? Would you like me to not re- activate old threads from years ago? Or to not ask recent members “How are you?”
Please let me know.
✨️🌿✨️ Anita
June 1, 2026 at 6:08 pm #458311anitaParticipantStill waiting for your answer, Thomas 🙏
I just need to know what bothers you when I post my “How are you?”- kind inquiries in recent members’ threads (including yours).
Often enough members do answer me, and that’s a positive thing, isn’t it, Thomas?
And what is it that bothers you about me re- activating threads of years ago so that I can learn from them, even if members don’t answer (most recently a member of years ago did answer- Lella)
* I am totally willing to post in this Zen Story thread on a regular basis just so to bring it to the top of list of topics so that it’s most visible.
Would you like that, Thomas?
I will continue to inquire about recent members and reactivate old threads but I will rethink it when and if I read your response.
✨️🌿✨️ Anita
June 1, 2026 at 9:19 pm #458316Thomas168ParticipantAnita,
Please continue to do what you believe is right. It doesn’t matter whether you post in this thread or not. Just do you. And I will do me. And life goes on. We all have things going on. Some good and some needing more attention. Just disregard my past posts. I only mentioned it as a passing thought. Please do not get upset. You have done a lot of good here. And I don’t really matter.
June 1, 2026 at 9:50 pm #458317anitaParticipantHey Dear Thomas, Mon 9:50 pm here by the time I submit this post (Tues 12:50 am for you):
Thank you for answering me (I was afraid that you won’t).
Thomas- what you think and what you feel matter to me!
I don’t want to disregard anything that you say.
It’s very slow here in the forums, which is perhaps an opportunity for you to fully express yourself, to make yourself matter (because you do)!
Seems to me that these forums are dying, so little activity. I am here because I don’t yet know where else to be online. Like I shared with you before, the great majority of people who follow the tiny buddha home page content do so on social media- where these forums are not part of, so hardly anyone who follow tb content is aware that these forums exist.
“And I don’t really matter.”- says Thomas. Anita says: you really matter. I mean it, you do!
Anita
June 3, 2026 at 6:14 am #458352RobertaParticipantHi Thomas
For a long time I did not have the time for formal practice & missed/resented that aspect until a friend & fellow practioner/carer said that looking after our parents is the practice put into real time reality.
Now I am not so busy, but have got out of the habit of extended daily practice, so I am always grateful to make time to sit with others when they request or take up an offer of a session.Been married twice & had more relationships than I can count, so romantic relationships are definitely not my area of strength. The more I understand myself, I realize I was a sense junkie ( giving & receiving sensual pleasure) with limited capacity to put up with bad habits as I judged them whilst ignoring my own faults! Since taking a vow of celibacy I create a lot less havoc in mine & others lives.
I am grateful to this forum as a place where conversations that have a depth & sense of enquiry happen.
I hope your urge to drink is not overwhelming & you are being kind to yourself.
RobertaJune 3, 2026 at 8:20 am #458354Thomas168ParticipantHi Roberta,
Formal practice? None before. But now, I would like to believe I am one a better path. Not the right one but a better one. Hopefully my understanding has improved.
Every once in a while, I feel the need for a drink. Use to smoke cigarettes but quit about 22 years ago when my daughter was born. Use to have dreams of smoking. The drink just provides for a different mood. I don’t drink to get drunk. Just a little tipsy. At worse, once in a weekend. Not every weekend. Not dependent upon it. I have more of a coffee addiction than alcohol.
Practice seems to come in many forms. First is the sitting practice. Spending 30 minutes each day just sitting. Then there is the practice to carry that mind set forward into daily life. Whether sitting on a bench waiting for the bus or sitting in a doctor’s waiting room, always be present. It doesn’t mean not thinking or the mind being somewhere else. But, being here in this moment. Not distracted by thoughts which pull one away from here. But, this practice comes and goes with the energy surrounding me.
I too appreciate the forum for allowing space to talk to others of similar thoughts. And for being able to help others on their journey. Anita seems to be a moving force here. Very strong and capable of compassion. Of course this doesn’t exclude the others here who also help provide a warm space of hope. Shout out to those here with a kind word to spare.
Be well and hope all is good for you and yours.
TommyJune 6, 2026 at 11:28 am #458412anitaParticipantDear Tommy:
Thank you for your kind words about me 🙏
Congrats for 22 years of smoking-abstinance- one of the many loving things you did as a father, and from her very birth 👍👍👍
I too drink not so to get drunk, but so to get tipsy. Alcohol is the cause or facilitator of a lot of harm in the world, but it is also a great relief and even healing (what’s behind the term “wine therapy”) for millions- not harmful, but helpful- not in excess, of course.
* And excess is clearly defined when it comes to driving. So, no argument there!
I would like to research if there’s a Zen Story about alcohol (later, when I have access to the one remaining computer after mine was destroyed due to an accident due to 🍷 my dog).
Anita
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