fbpx
Menu

Posts by Lori Deschene

Lori Deschene is the founder of Tiny Buddha. She started the site after struggling with depression, bulimia, c-PTSD, and toxic shame so she could recycle her former pain into something useful and inspire others to do the same. You can find her books, including Tiny Buddha’s Gratitude Journal and Tiny Buddha’s Worry Journal, here and learn more about her eCourse, Recreate Your Life Story, if you’re ready to transform your life and become the person you want to be.

Lori Deschene's Website

Be Part of the Next Tiny Buddha Book: 365 Tiny Love Challenges

By

*The deadline to submit a story has now passed. Thank you to everyone who submitted one! You will receive an email by the end of November if I’d like to include your story in the book.

When I started this site in 2009, after struggling for over a decade with depression, bulimia, and shame-induced isolation, I hoped it would be a place where we could all feel less alone with our struggles and more empowered to overcome them. I’m beyond thrilled to see that’s just what Tiny Buddha has become.

Over the past five years, I’ve been honored to help …

How to Deal with Criticism Well: 25 Reasons to Embrace It

By

“Criticism is something you can easily avoid by saying nothing, doing nothing, and being nothing.” ~Aristotle

At the end of the day, when I feel completely exhausted, it often has nothing to do with all the things I’ve done.

It’s not a consequence of juggling multiple responsibilities and projects. It’s not my body’s way of punishing me for becoming a late-life jogger after a period of laziness. It’s not even about getting too little sleep.

When I’m exhausted, you can be sure I’ve bent over backward trying to win everyone’s approval. I’ve obsessed over what people think of me, I’ve …

When You Feel Purposeless and Fear You’re Wasting Time

By

“Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.” ~George Bernard Shaw

I wanted a guarantee.

I wanted to know for sure that if I tried to do something, I would like it; if I devoted my limited time to it, I’d end up somewhere good.

I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life, and I felt certain this was a phenomenal failing—because if you don’t know right now what you need to do to make your life count, life will pass you by before you’ve ever had a chance to do something meaningful or …

How to Deal with Regret: 8 Ways to Benefit and Move Forward

By

“Stay away from what might have been and look at what can be.” ~Marsha Petrie Sue

When I look back at some of the most painful moments of my life, I see myself sitting alone, feeling either immense shame or regret.

It’s bizarre how we can get so offended and angry when other people hurt us and yet repeatedly choose to torture ourselves, far worse than they possibly could, through repeated mental rehashing.

For the longest time, my biggest regret revolved around missing out on life.

From a distance, people always thought I had everything going for me. Up close, …

Two Free, Life Changing Meditation Events

By

If you’re anything like me, you may sometimes have the best intentions of meditating, only to find yourself finding excuses to avoid sitting still.

Maybe it’s because the thought of slowing down makes your heart start to race with terror. Maybe it’s because you’d rather sit naked on the subway floor for an hour than sit with your own thoughts for even a minute.

Or maybe your lack of motivation stems from a list of can’ts—a sense that you can’t devote enough time to make it worthwhile, or you can’t do it consistently because some days are busier than others, …

Worrying About the Future: On Trusting in Uncertainty

By

“Worry pretends to be necessary but serves no useful purpose.” ~Eckhart Tolle

The other day my good friend from back home called me hysterically crying. She felt certain she just blew a second job interview, and she’d hit a breaking point.

She’d been struggling for months, just barely paying her bills and wondering if she could afford to keep her apartment.

Every purchase had become an exercise in extreme deliberation. In fact, I’m fairly certain that when I visited last, I saw her stressing in the grocery store about whether she really needed that box of Twinkies that beckoned from …

25 Ways to Be Good for Someone Else

By

“Don’t wait for people to be friendly. Show them how.” ~Unknown

When I was a teenager, right around the time I knew everything, my mother used to tell me I only remembered the bad things.

When I told stories about my family, they didn’t revolve around family beach trips, barbecues, and vacations; they focused on painful memories and all the ways I felt my childhood had damaged me.

The same applied to friends and milestones in my life. I chronically remembered and rehashed the worst experiences.

In fact, straight through college I followed up every introductory handshake with a dramatic …

33 Ways to Be Childlike Today

By

“Great is the human who has not lost his childlike heart.” ~Mencius

Remember when life was simple?

When your friends were the most important thing in the world. When a snow day was a perfect excuse to have fun, not a block of time when you felt guilty about being unproductive.

When the ice cream truck could make your day, no matter what happened before. Bad grade? Big deal—it’s snow cone time. Skinned knee—who cares, you have a screwball!

If only you could bottle that sense of freedom, fun, and enthusiasm for the little things, you could carry it …

A Place to Release Your Secrets and Shame: Share Your Truth in the Forums

By

Ten months ago when I launched the Tiny Buddha community forums, I hoped they would better enable us all to connect with and support each other.

Since then, I’ve been amazed and inspired to see the love and compassion people extend there, without any agenda beyond helping others feel less alone and more at ease in our uncertain, often confusing world.

There are now over 10,000 active forum members, and there have been more than 1,600 conversations on a wide range of topics related to spirituality, self-esteem, relationships, purpose, parenting, health and fitness, and more.

Whether you’re an active …

50 Ways to Find Creative Inspiration

By

“If we look at the world with a love of life, the world will reveal its beauty to us.” ~Daisaku Ikeda

I have always loved that scene in American Beauty when Ricky Fitts shows his video of a plastic bag blowing in the wind.

He’s the complete opposite of his neighbor Lester Burnham, who seems to have decided long ago to live life in a comatose state of submission, completely disconnected from authentic joy.

Ricky seems inspired by everything that most people simply overlook. He explains of his bag video:

“It was one of those days when it’s a minute …

25 Ways to Make a Difference in the World Every Day

By

“The way to gain a good reputation is to endeavor to be what you desire to appear.” ~Socrates

When I started Tiny Buddha, my main goal was to make a positive difference. I think that’s a goal many of us share.

I’ve stumbled upon countless blog and books written by people who say their purpose in life is to help people.

I suspect it’s how most of us infuse our lives with meaning: trying to somehow leave the world a better place than we found it.

I recently read a somewhat old blog post by ex-Microsoft employee Scott Berkun that …

Yoga Dudes for Movember Photo Contest ($1000 Yoga Gear Prize!)

By

I credit yoga with transforming and possibly saving my life, so I knew I wanted to get involved when I learned about Yoga Dudes for Movember.

In case you’re not familiar, “Movember” is a mustache growing charity event that takes place during—you guessed it—November.

Every year, men around the world grow handlebars and Fu Manchus to raise awareness for prostate cancer and other men’s health issues.

This year, Yoga Trail’s running a photo contest called “Yoga Dudes” to encourage men to grab a mat and reap the many physical and mental health benefits of a consistent practice.

You …

Win a Free Copy of Tiny Buddha’s Guide to Loving Yourself

By

UPDATE: The winners for this giveaway have already been chosen. 

The winners:

  • Antwanette Miller
  • Rebecca

This may seem like Déjà vu, because I published an almost identical post last Friday. It’s now a new week (soon to be weekend) and a new chance to win a copy of Tiny Buddha’s Guide to Loving Yourself!

For those of you who already bought a copy, I hope you’re enjoying it!

And I have a special request for you: Since it’s brand new, there are currently only four reviews on Amazon. (Thank you so much to those of you who responded to …

Book Giveaway: Tiny Buddha’s Guide to Loving Yourself

By

UPDATE: The winners for this giveaway have already been chosen. They are:

  • Sunny Kharbanda
  • UnicaPoet

It’s been 10 days since the launch of Tiny Buddha’s Guide to Loving Yourself, and I’m excited to share that the book has been a bestseller in Amazon’s self-esteem category since then.

For those of you who already bought a copy, I hope you’re enjoying it!

And I have a special request for you: Since it’s brand new, there’s currently only one review on Amazon. Those reviews go a long way in influencing people who may benefit from the book.

If you’ve found the …

Book Giveaway: Guide to Loving Yourself and In the Garden of Thoughts

By

UPDATE: The winners for this giveaway have already been chosen. They are:

  • Vanessa Fisher
  • ljchern
  • kbennett10486
  • Jon

Today I’m excited to run a giveaway for two books that I believe complement each other nicely—the site’s latest collaborative project, Tiny Buddha’s Guide to Loving Yourself and In the Garden of Thoughts, a New York Times bestselling inspirational book, written by my new friend Dodinsky.

About In the Garden of Thoughts

I was fortunate to connect with Dodinsky on Facebook, where he runs a popular page called “Positive Outlooks” that’s followed by over two million people.

Though his heartening images and …

Love Yourself and Your Life: 7 Reasons to Buy the New Tiny Buddha Book

By

10/9/13: The pre-order promotion is now over. You can learn more about Tiny Buddha’s Guide to Loving Yourself here!

If you visited the blog any time during September, you likely saw some of the many self-love interviews featuring contributors from the new book Tiny Buddha’s Guide to Loving Yourself: 40 Ways to Transform Your Inner Critic and Your Life.

I’m excited to announce that today is the official launch date! If you already ordered a copy on Amazon, it’s possible that you already received it, as I’ve recently learned they shipped a little early.

If you haven’t redeemed …

How to Stop Fearing Disapproval: 3 Lessons from Accepting Judgment

By

“Lean too much on the approval of people, and it becomes a bed of thorns.” ~Tehyi Hsieh

I remember reading somewhere that the best way to face a fear is through repeated exposure.

In the case of my lifelong need for approval, I have found this to be true.

For as long as I can remember, I have wanted, needed everyone to like me. And not just like me, but agree with and sanction my every choice through obvious signs of validation.

I remember auditioning for a community theater production of Annie when I was twelve.

My …

Tiny Buddha’s Guide to Loving Yourself Interview: Mary Dunlop

By

This month we’re celebrating the upcoming launch of Tiny Buddha’s Guide to Loving Yourself, a book about taming your inner critic that features 40 stories from Tiny Buddha contributors. 

Throughout September, you’ll have a chance to meet some of them through daily interviews here on the blog.

Today’s featured contributor is Mary Dunlop, a writer and passionate student of life who believes we all have a special gift.

In her contribution for the book, she shares how she learned to be comfortable in her own skin, and how we can learn to accept and embrace ourselves, just as …

Tiny Buddha’s Guide to Loving Yourself Interview: Sam Russell

By

This month we’re celebrating the upcoming launch of Tiny Buddha’s Guide to Loving Yourself, a book about taming your inner critic that features 40 stories from Tiny Buddha contributors. 

Throughout September, you’ll have a chance to meet some of them through daily interviews here on the blog.

Today’s featured contributor is Sam E.A.B. Russell, a UK-based writer and photographer who considers himself a cynic by nature but tries to prove through his writing that cynics can be happy and positive too.

In his contribution for the book, he shares some of the common defeatist, limiting beliefs that stand …

Tiny Buddha’s Guide to Loving Yourself Interview: Alexandra Heather Foss

By

This month we’re celebrating the upcoming launch of Tiny Buddha’s Guide to Loving Yourself, a book about taming your inner critic that features 40 stories from Tiny Buddha contributors. 

Throughout September, you’ll have a chance to meet some of them through daily interviews here on the blog.

Today’s featured contributor is Alexandra Heather Foss. A freelance writer who has overcome countless difficulties—from childhood trauma to health issues—she values both her tears and smiles, because both have made her who she is.

In her contribution for the book, she shares why she sees beauty in her scars, and how …