Thank you, Mark, Inky and Anita for your response. Much appreciated.

@Anita – Yes, my father used to do that and now his son is doing that, with both. Currently, my mother shouts back at my Dad and they both quarrel like cats and dogs. And another situation is where everyone of them is frustrated with each other.

My brother often says that he wants to leave the city; I have tried to ask him to take the plunge (he wants to too, but he doesn’t take a decision) because when he is not around at home, the environment is peaceful and calm.

Kind Regards

This to me seems more of a trap. Since in India there are lot of issues with in-laws staying together. And since the parents stay with the son and not a daughter. So women choose for a family where the in-laws are either working or living with another son.

Absolutely,

In fact I ensure to raise my concerns and he works towards it. He is open to change for the better. And has also asked me couple of times if I am able to see the changes.

The irritation part comes when he sticks to me all the time (his pace is fast and mine slow). Whe He is ready to jump into marriage and for me marriage is a strict no. He is okay with it until I’m ready for it. Patient until I accept his proposal.

But I have to mention that I have been getting sound and stress free sleep these days which I hadn’t had in a long time. May be the feeling of reliability that he extends. And I ensure to have my time.

The other things I have liked in him is, whenever I get upset, he comes with a small present to cheer me up. And doesn’t hold ego to say sorry.

Thank you, Anita for posting and being there. Hugs!

Thank you Matty for your response.
He expressed after two years because he was getting his personal life resolved and didn’t want to approach me when he was married. (A good trait).
But from my end, yeah I like him only because he loves me.
We got closer because of office politics and he took it as an opportunity to get closer. I didn’t pay heed to him earlier because I really didn’t like his attitude in office. Sometimes, he just doesn’t let other person talk just to put his point up.

Elle Tinker 700,
Thank you for sharing your experiences. It was a pleasure to listen you talk:-)

Anita,
Hope you’re doing well. Thanks for posting reply. You got it right on the Win-lose attitude. May be it stems from a bad past and low self-esteem.
About possessiveness, I am keeping him in limits. Giving back whenever he tries to change me. (It is hard and takes mental peace of mind to not let someone be too much onto you). Whenever we are together, I often end up losing temper and feel irritated.
It feels like I’m mothering a child. Do this, don’t do that! How can a 37 year old be so childish!

The positives and why I want to consider him:
1) A person who won’t give up on me and will work towards the relation because he is clear about me. (I had read somewhere, a man who isn’t sure of you will never be sure about you, and will never commit)
He is open to change and is changing for better. Also, I have come to a stage where I’m losing hope of getting a suitable partner (I’m 31 now). For reasons that lie in past I tend to give up on instances such as ‘he wakes up at 8 and not 6 am; so he’s not the one for me’. And this guy is being patient with me all the time, understands what I’ve been through.
I feel the need to have someone who will stand by me (and that can be one who loves me?) None of us are kids here, we both look for a long term relationship.

Phew! Will I ever get someone I don’t need to break up with or I have to be tolerant and more receptive of the other person. And adjust!?