Forum Replies Created
-
Hi Unavailable,
Well, actions speak louder than words. The only way to SHOW her is to move to where she is. That might freak some people out though! LOL!
Aside from that, regular correspondence. But shake it up! Text one day, Skype the next, FB occasionally, call sometimes, send a care package! That’s what I do for my DD, communications at different times in different ways ~ so she knows we really are thinking about her and that it contacting her isn’t part of a boring “routine”.
Another thought ~ in the old days they had Promise Rings. She can also wear (I forget what they call it!) an Irish ring ~ if it points one way she’s available, if it points another way she is seeing someone. Some physical token she can wear and look at.
Good Luck!
Inky
Hi jack,
I kind of know what you mean. Who would take care of you if something bad happens, what would that look like and can they afford it?
But what if you’re alone? Freaks me the heck out!
This year, for whatever reason, friends, family, and acquaintances have been dying off. At least one a month if you average it out. (Usually three a month and then nothing ~ clusters). Older people look at me and say, “Well, you’re getting to that age…” It drives me nuts.
So off course now I’m thinking quite a bit on our own mortality.
Sometimes I lay awake at night in a panic. What if my DH dies before me? And what if he dies NOW? I’d be screwed. He’s the type of person who micro manages everything into HIS screwy system! Like he has 100 passwords on one crumpled sheet of paper written in smudged pencil. But then he has gorgeous spread sheets on the household budget. But then he has to dig around 1000 business cards to find the name of the new guy who handles our taxes. And yet has memorized the number of the snow plow guy. And that’s just the household stuff. What about the business??
If you take active steps to prepare for the inevitable, probable and possible, that’s all you can do.
Getting back to disabilities, now I know why people say, “S/he died in his/her sleep, it’s a blessing.” Not even being disabled, but being very old.
I want to be a spry 90 year old who will die in her sleep!! Living in a cottage with my DH! With a personal secretary/house manager to make sure we’re OK if one of us dies first!!
I don’t know if I answered your question/thought, but it did activate an anxiety in me!
Inky
Hi Glenda,
This is what I would do rightly or wrongly ~ all’s fair in love and war, after all!…
You had some great times with the young pastor, and you would be the perfect pastor’s wife, honestly, BUT…
You are having fantasies about dumping your nice long term boyfriend…
AND the pastor VERY POSSIBLY may just think he’s had a nice dinner and a movie with a congregant. And that’s all.
What could be more alluring than a single handsome pastor? They wouldn’t have picked him for the church unless he was good with people. There were probably at least 10-12 other people applying for the job. Meaning, he may have charisma, but for all you know he is having dinner and a movie (discreetly of course) with several other people ~ casually (in his mind).
I’m saying don’t throw away a ten year relationship UNLESS you were going to do that anyway.
Of course, if the pastor asks if you want to date exclusively I would then say go for it!
And I don’t know about your church but it’s frowned upon where we are to date a congregant. Clergy usually go outside of their congregation to date.
Best,
Inky
It’s one thing for art to imitate life. But Glenda is like life imitating art. A caricature of a caricature. Even a director for a cheesy Christian movie would SEVERELY edit her posts!! She has a personality disorder if she is real, that’s for sure!
Oh J,
That was so beautifully written!! Things (like reading Harry Potter) filled me with excitement for your younger self!!
My Brag Sheet:
Winning the art award in school so often that when I didn’t win it the teacher whispered to me, “You can’t ALWAYS win the art award” with a wink.
Having cartoons published in school and local town papers.
Wedding Day
Birth of my three kids
Becoming a Stephen’s Minister
One kid winning a National sporting event (sailing). Belonging to a backwater club who just doesn’t “produce” sailors like that. People coming out of the wood work thinking we’re some magical parents. I’m an Introvert big time but suddenly had this “aloof vibe”. LOL
Building a house when No One thought we could/would/should do that
Being the only parent who said “NO!” and brought a person endangering minors to jail/court. Everyone’s all “Aren’t you afraid of…?” and I’m all, truthfully, “No.”
Being asked to be a speaker at a National event for our town.
Volunteering in Central America and Biloxi after the hurricanes.
Learning basic Krav Maga.
Being in a room full of relatives arguing over whether to pull the plug on a cousin. Being the only calm head in the room who asked, “What does the Living Will say?” thus ending the fighting and everyone leaving in peace.
Oh my goodness, I’ll stop there!
Anyone else?
Inky
Though I run this site, it is not mine. It's ours. It's not about me. It's about us. Your stories and your wisdom are just as meaningful as mine. 