I agree about your thoughts on Mamata

And about CEN I took a test and it says I have some mild signs of that. That’s why. It’s not fully diagnosed by therapist but because of most of the symptoms were related that’s why I said. Like Low self esteem, shunning emotional closeness or intimacy, Mild ADHD (hyperactivity). Etc

I wouldn’t say they fulfilled my emotional needs 100%. Maybe my mother tried but my father didn’t. I used to be scared of him when I was little but scared not for abuse or anything. Just his anger when I’d do something wrong. It was different from my mother side if I do something wrong she’d tell me it’s wrong to do that and also explain why it’s wrong. Even now If I have to spend an hour alone with my father it doesn’t feel that much comfortable but I can spend whole day with my mother. But I try to tell myself it’s okay to have different views and I don’t have to be like him. We all are different. I respect him as he is. But I’m also sure I’m not craving validation from any of my parents. Childhood is past and I’m just trying to be better in the present

Dear Anita,
“No anger toward your parents, ever?”
So here’s a thing. There was a time when I used to be angry with my father because he used to mostly comparing others with me like look at him he achieved this and that and I was like yeah yeah… Luckily, he doesn’t do that anymore. Rn He’s like do whatever seems right for you.  And My mom has always been kind to me and supported me no matter what.

People fear committing to a relationship with another person because they don’t want to find themselves stuck with that person: not having an easy way out.

Oh well yeah I do feel like that sometimes that’s why I want to work on solving Fearful-avoidant attachment style

Dear Anita,

First of All, Thanks a lot! I’m impressed with how much you’re analyzing and trying to connect the dots. I highly appreciate it.

Insecure-avoidant attachment

Yes I think you’re right so I think it’s time for me to IRL again? NGL it’s been a while so… I’m not a shy person as I used to be. (At least that’s what I think) But here’s the thing about my LDRs and IRLs I haven’t approached a girl first… Even Once
So like I’d have to make the first move for like really the First time

being in long-distance relationships with women who never met you is a way to avoid being given the opposite of physical compliments: physical criticisms and perhaps insults.

Hmm I think you’re right

Sometimes you turn your inner criticism outward: criticizing your LDR girlfriend. The so called Inner Critic often turns into an Outer Critic, and back and forth. The two critics are like two sides of the same coin.

I agree.  So How should I start working on that?

Do you carry anger within you, for sacrificing and not asking for anything?

No. Not at all. I’m actually grateful for what they gave me.

do you pay a heavy price for being really calm and friendly: suppressing anger perhaps, or suffering extra anxiety?

Okay so this? I’m not sure about this. How should I figure this out?

Because for a while I’m considering myself Calm and friendly person. So It’s like just a mirror image of my thoughts?

You’d like to share about your irl relationship experience, please do.

Hmm I think it was very exciting. The Talking, Hand in Hand and the physical intimacy. It’s just good. You can’t get that feeling in texting. Hands down. Another is that it happened when I wasn’t mature as I am now. I was always on the edge it was really easy to make me angry that time so if something happens, we are fighting and not talking for days, and I was crazy stubborn (I still am a lil) Even at that time they be asking to be commitment and I wasn’t ready for that at all so Yeah commitment issues as well

And no I’m not afraid of IRL. I had IRL and I enjoyed it quite a lot

Dear Anita:
So, my previous LDR lasted more than 3 years. Really tested my patience. haven’t met in person. and not even video called once (funny I know) I felt like I wasted so much time and for what?
I’m an Aries-INFJ so I’m someone who prefers action yet still I waited that much long…and it took me more than a year to heal from that

Now this LDR, it’s been only two months. We didn’t meet in person Yet. She’s nice and mature but she is somewhat an anxious person. like whatever I suggest she be like it’s easy to tell, hard to do. even though I tried being patience she’s just doesn’t want to get out of her comfort zone. She didn’t even tell her parents about her moving plans or that she wants to study in Europe. I’m like when you planning to tell them.
It’s me I’m impatience and I’m kind of scared too because I don’t want to waste my time and emotions

Dear Anita!
Good morning to you 🌞
Hope you’re doing well

I understood that clearly. Thanks for such a simple and clear wisdom. I highly appreciate it.
Have a good day and don’t forget to smile :))

Dear Anita:

Diverse? Yeah I took lot responsibilities in single roles so yeah, I guess so. Impressive?? idk because I guess others could’ve done the same