If your brain is very unhappy, like Brody, who’s full of fear and self-doubt, take a few minutes to watch this cute little video. Happiness can be quite simple when we learn how to train our brain.
“Change is inevitable. Growth is intentional.” ~Glenda Cloud
What do you do when you come to the end of a calendar year as it approaches the start of another one? Do you get caught up in the festive season hype and then, as you roll into the new year, find it all a bit anticlimactic? Or, are you a bit like me and prefer to keep it a quieter, reflective time?
We know that calendar time is really artificial, for true time is simply an infinite and continuous cycle of day and night, seasons, birth and death, and change.…
“In chaos, there is fertility.” ~Anaïs Nin
Are you a calm creature in your yoga class, then you get home and yell at your kids?
Do you ever read a really inspirational book or blog and think, “Yes! That makes total sense, and I’m going to start doing that!” Then life gets busy and it never quite happens?
Do you ever feel like you’re two different people living in the same body? Saying one thing, doing another?
Me too.
For the past fifteen years I’ve been a self-development junkie.
I’ve read tons of books and I’ve attended courses and …
“If we do not feel grateful for what we already have, what makes us think we’d be happy with more?” ~Unknown
From time to time during my schooling years I’d be asked to identify my role models. I always chose someone who’d changed the world in a big way—Martin Luther King Jnr, Nelson Mandela, Mahatma Gandhi.
I never looked within my own life for role models. I had lovely parents and great teachers, and still, I was always looking well beyond what was right in front of me. I was always striving for something more, out there, beyond my own …
“The most important point is to accept yourself and stand on your two feet.” ~Shunryu Suzuki
When I was younger, I am sure I was a little bit arrogant. I had high expectations for my life. They haven’t come to pass. I haven’t achieved whatever I thought I would achieve. It turns out that I’m an ordinary human being struggling with ordinary things.
Now that I’m in my forties, I have experienced disappointment, failure, and confusion. Many times I have lost sight of the path, and sometimes it’s felt like there never was one.
I expected I would be a …
“Do your little bit of good where you are; it’s those little bits of good put together that overwhelm the world.” ~Desmond Tutu
I was recently at the grocery store, and not once, but twice, I encountered couples practically duking it out in the aisles. I mean, full on snit-fits happening here. One pair was so mad, the woman actually walked in the opposite direction down the aisle, her five- or six-year-old in tow.
Totally productive, right?
The other pair was fighting because the husband couldn’t decide which milk to get. His wife was trying to hurry him up, and …
“Gratitude creates joy—not vice versa.” ~Dr. Brené Brown
To be blunt, my summer of 2013 sucked. In a matter of months, a tidal wave of stressful events happened and it completely shattered my sense of safety. I was on the verge of a serious depression.
The summer began with a broken heart. The love of my life, the man I planned to marry, broke up with me and admitted he had wanted to leave for the past year.
In a matter of minutes, my dreams of starting a family and living happily ever after were crushed. It caught me so …
“Happiness is the absence of striving for happiness.” ~Chuang Tzu
It all started when one of my boys asked me if I was happy, and of course I answered yes.
Why wouldn’t I be happy? I have a handsome and kind husband, two boys of which I am very proud, I had a successful business, I had a house I loved, I was surrounded by friends, I was a sought after speaker in my community, and blah blah blah.
Then my son asked why I didn’t have fun anymore. I began defending my happiness to him, explaining all the reasons …
“On a deeper level you are already complete. When you realize that, there is a playful, joyous energy behind what you do.” ~Eckhart Tolle
We have this strange need or conditioning to not take responsibility for our own happiness. We expect it to come from an outside source.
It can happen, but it’s fleeting. True happiness has to come from within.
True happiness comes from a connection to our true being.
Years ago my family and I took our dog to obedience school, and the trainer told us, if we have more than one dog, to never let them share …
“Trust the wait. Embrace the uncertainty. Enjoy the beauty of becoming. When nothing is certain, anything is possible.” ~Mandy Hale
Sitting in the auditorium during orientation, I listened to various deans, distinguished alumni, and student leaders drone on about the rigors of earning a law degree.
There were obligatory mentions of not everyone making it to graduation (or even the end of the first week) and of the intense strain on personal relationships.
But the message I remembered most clearly was about uncertainty.
“You better get comfortable with gray areas. And fast. Because the legal field is not a place …
“It isn’t what happens to us that causes us to suffer; it’s what we say to ourselves about what happens.” ~Pema Chodron
You know that foreboding fear we all have—that something will go terribly wrong and life will never be the same again?
Mine is that something will happen to our daughter. She is our only child. We battled infertility for years before conceiving her. I keep telling myself that it’s just an irrational fear and that every parent probably has it to some extent, but it’s a constant companion that stealthily follows me around everywhere I go.
So, on …
“Whatever the present moment contains, accept it as if you had chosen it. Always work with it, not against it. Make it your friend and ally, not your enemy.” ~Eckhart Tolle
Have you ever had a big financial expense knock you down?
I had one of those situations hit me many years ago. I had just gone through a tough breakup, was experiencing regrets about my career choice, and was also struggling to get on my feet financially.
I was feeling beat down and decided to try to lift myself up by getting my finances in better shape. I …
“Think of all the beauty that is still left in and around you and be happy.” ~Anne Frank
At first glance, the happiest person I’ve ever met appeared to be a simple man. There didn’t seem to be anything particularly sophisticated or spiritual about him.
Srulik was five-feet tall, with a big round belly and a wide smile permanently plastered on his face. He enjoyed the small things in life: a good joke, a familiar television show, a wholesome meal. He radiated such joy, and was so unassuming in his demeanor that one would assume he was blessed with an …
“There are two primary choices in life: to accept conditions as they exist, or accept responsibility for changing them.” ~Denis Waitley
I was spending some time with my nephews not too long ago. This is one of my favorite things to do because we have a lot of fun together. They’re silly and loving and inquisitive, and it’s easy to make them laugh.
Spending time with them reminds me that fun and laughter should be a part of my everyday life, and also makes me feel like a kid again.
When we were together that day, I asked them …
“Happiness is the absence of striving for happiness.” ~Chuang-Tse
Everywhere we turn these days we seem to be bombarded by it.
TV commercials try to lure you into buying their products on the promise they will give you it. Magazines scream it from the front pages via sultry images and sexy block titles. Gossip magazines practically have a mission statement that fame will guarantee it. Corporations equate money with it.
So what exactly is it? What’s this one common denominator that seems to be a worldwide obsession? Happiness!
There are thousands upon thousands of articles, seminars, webinars, TV …
“We cannot live only for ourselves. A thousand fibers connect us with our fellow men.” ~Herman Melville
Recently I experienced a triumph in my career. The details are not important and frankly, many people might even consider it a trivial accomplishment, but it was important to me.
Usually when things go our way there are two ways someone might react: humility or boasting. I decided to try something completely different.
Boasting isn’t really part of who I am. Raised to be humble, take praise with many grains of salt, I play down accomplishments. But, this course never seems to get …
“It is not joy that makes us grateful. It is gratitude that makes us joyful.” ~David Rast
Every New Years Eve I make a list of resolutions that I never keep up with and it just makes me feel guilty every time I don’t. Lose ten pounds, get more involved, go to the gym, develop better relationships.
Every year I aspire to be more, do more, get more, never living within the present moment.
My stress to do more comes into play in every aspect of my life. The stress of joining more clubs comes from the competitive environment of …
“We often take for granted the very things that most deserve our gratitude.” ~Cynthia Ozick
How often do you pause to appreciate what you have in life?
When I was young, I took things for granted. I believe many other kids did so, as well. After all, we were young and we didn’t know what life could be like on the other side.
One thing we took for granted was education. In my country, it’s compulsory for all kids to go to school, so it was a given. We never thought about how lucky we were to be educated.…
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