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Posts tagged with “goals”

The Key to Accomplishing Goals: Moving from Ego to Spirit

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“Change is inevitable. Growth is intentional.” ~Glenda Cloud

My life is over.

That’s what I thought when I got the news that I’d lost my job after fifteen years with two sister companies. I loved this job. I was on the road to becoming everything I thought I wanted to be—a Hollywood studio vice president, well on my way to running a studio someday.

I was doing something I loved, developing stories. And now it was all over.

Have you ever had a moment like that? When the end of something in your life felt like the end of your …

5 Questions To Ask Yourself If You’re Not Where You Thought You’d Be

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“Yesterday I was clever, so I wanted to change the world. Today I am wise, so I am changing myself.” ~Rumi

When I left high school, I had no idea about what I wanted to be when I “grew up.” I still had no idea when I left university. There wasn’t anything in me that really burned to be a doctor, a translator, a lawyer, or an artist, for example.

I was a bit of an all-arounder and wasn’t really 100% focused in any one direction. I always thought this was the curse of completing an arts degree (namely French), …

Why It’s Okay to Live a “Boring” Life If That’s What You Want

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“Remember that sometimes not getting what you want is a wonderful stroke of luck.” ~Dalai Lama

Some people know from the time they are small what they are going to be “when they grow up.”

I, at various times, was going to be an archeologist, paleontologist, veterinarian, famous rock musician, famous film director, actor, studio guitar player, music production engineer, choir teacher, choral composer, less famous film director, film editor, screenwriter, alpaca farmer, or cattle farmer.

As of this writing, I make wedding films and assist my wife with wedding photography. There is no fame, enough money, but no riches …

Scared to Try: Moving Beyond the Paralysis of Perfectionism

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“Fear is inevitable, I have to accept that, but I cannot allow it to paralyze me.” ~Isabel Allende

I am a recovering perfectionist.

Up until now, this is the only way I’ve known how to live. The thrilling burn of perfection invaded every aspect of my life to the point that I became paralyzed by fear. If I couldn’t do it right, I didn’t want to do it at all.

When I was younger, I allowed the desire for perfection to control all of my actions. In music, if I couldn’t sit first chair, I didn’t want to play …

4 Powerful Questions to Free You from the Daze of Fear and Inaction

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“The lives we lead have everything to do with the questions we ask ourselves.” ~Lori Deschene

You lay in bed night after night, tossing and turning, eager to push forward but unable to shake off the onslaught of what-ifs.

What if I’m making a huge mistake? What if I fail utterly and miserably? What if I’m overestimating my ability to go through with this? What-if…? What-if…?

Yet, no matter how crazy your anxiety and fears seem right now, you can snap out of it and make that new start you so desperately desire.

How do I know?

Let me …

8 Ways to Discover Your Passion and Live a Life You Love

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“Don’t worry about what the world needs.  Ask what makes you come alive and do that, because what the world needs is people who have come alive.” ~Howard Thurman

I didn’t spend two years and $100,000 for a master’s degree in counseling from an Ivy League university so that I could be miserable and hate my life fifty hours a week, but that’s what happened.

After a few years in the trenches of the non-profit world, my job had become so emotionally draining that it was taking a vicious toll on my health and causing gripping anxiety attacks. I …

Overcoming the Fear of Taking a Risk: Just Do It

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“Fear is inevitable, I have to accept that, but I cannot allow it to paralyze me.” ~Isabelle Allende

About eight months ago I hitched a ride to Buenos Aires, Argentina via a one way ticket with the love of my life. It wasn’t as easy as it sounds. I wasn’t throwing things in my suitcase and cashing out my bank account while kissing friends and family goodbye, sayin’ “See ya!”

My boyfriend and I were recent graduates at wits end suffering economic woes with no place to go. We had always wanted to go abroad to teach English, but weren’t …

When You Don’t Get What You Want Something Better May Be Coming

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“Remember that sometimes not getting what you want is a wonderful stroke of luck.” ~Dalai Lama

While every adoption story is different, they all start with a loss. Our loss turned out to be the best thing that ever happened to us.

I’ve had two migraines in my life. Both were when I was battling infertility and in a war with my body. My brain had had enough apparently.

The first migraine was on my way to work one day (different story), and the second was before a dinner party. My friend was inviting her close friends over to make …

4 Lessons on How to Find the Right Direction in Life

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“Life’s blows cannot break a person whose spirit is warmed by the fire of enthusiasm.” ~Norman Vincent Peale

“Something just doesn’t feel right,” I thought to myself as I walked into my house after a long commute from work, being greeted by my exhausted spouse, who was trying to manage the kids after putting in a long day at her own job.

Work hard, save money, buy a house, and live happily ever after. The formula I grew up with didn’t seem all that great anymore. Was it broken? I mean, I worked at a good job but felt …

A 6-Step Daily Ritual to Create the Future and Enjoy the Present

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“What you do today is important, because you are exchanging a day of your life for it.” ~Unknown

I have always loved to-do lists. It gives me joy to plan my day in advance. Lists give me an overview, focus, and I simply love crossing things off.

Things changed when I became self-employed. My to-do list behavior turned from a supportive tool into an instrument of self-imposed pressure.

I felt that being self-employed meant that I had to work very hard to make things happen. The lists became longer and longer, at least fifteen big items per day.

As …

Taking Back Our Dreams: Releasing the Drive for Wealth and Status

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“The poor man is not he who is without a cent, but he who is without a dream.” ~Harry Kemp

We’ve all been there. You’re having a great time playing a game with your friends, and then all of a sudden, things start to get tense.

What started out as fun turns into a fierce competition, as everyone is desperately trying to collect gold coins, red flags, or whatever happens to be the game’s currency.

To an outsider, it would be clear that we are all playing a game. Just like the kid with the tallest stack of red coins, …

4 Conscious Choices to Stay Balanced and Happy When You’re Busy

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“Happiness is not a matter of intensity, but of balance, order, rhythm, and harmony.” ~Thomas Merton

I’m not someone who enjoys busyness or sees it as a sign of importance. In fact, I’ve often sacrificed money and opportunities to have more time to watch movies, roam around my neighborhood, and generally live life at a slow pace.

This is the way I most enjoy experiencing my days—by creating space to just be. And I find this supports my passion as a writer, since it allows me abundant opportunities to play, explore, and expand my understanding of the world and …

You Will Never Be Finished: Find Peace by Enjoying Where You Are

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“We can never obtain peace in the outer world until we make peace with ourselves.” ~Dalai Lama

“I wish I could do it all over again,” said my grandmother on her 60th wedding anniversary.

“Really?” I asked.

A small smile crossed her face as she replied, “Yes. Because when you enjoy your life—when you really enjoy your life—it just goes by so fast. I wish I could go back and do it all again.”

There was my 80-year-old grandmother, who, in the twilight of her years, spoke to me not of regrets.

Nor did she tell me about …

Releasing Expectations: 4 Ways To Live Your Life for You

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“He who trims himself to suit everyone will soon whittle himself away.” ~Raymond Hull

I tell people my 30s were for being married. This is a slight exaggeration, since I’m 39 now and single. However, I married at 30, divorced at 34, married again at 36, and divorced again at almost 39.

Both of the men were great guys. I meant well, each time. I went into each relationship with the intention I’d want to continue it.

Crap happens.

To many people this information is no big deal. I certainly didn’t think it was any big deal. However, I’ve been …

Live a Big Life: Shift from “Why Me?” to “Why?”

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“The journey is the reward.” ~Chinese Proverb

We’ve probably all heard this famous piece of wisdom at one time or another.

I’ll be honest, there were a few years where I just plain blew it off.

Like, “Yeah, yeah, journey, reward, I got it. Cool. Now, when’s my ship coming in?”

Not that I was greedy. Just impatient to arrive at a place called Made It. It seemed that other people were already there and I was eager to join them.

I had seen the brochure for Made It and I knew then and there, it was my kind …

Are Your Expectations Setting You Up for Disappointment?

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“Waking up to who you are requires letting go of who you imagine yourself to be.” ~Alan Watts

For a long time, I felt like I was standing on a riverbank just watching the water of life go by, too scared to jump in and play. I was waiting for the perfect current to come along that I could ride all the way to the completion of my intensely detailed life goals.

I didn’t want to move until I felt like success was guaranteed and I was certain it was the “right” thing. Life was flowing, and I wasn’t …

When Your Beliefs Hold You Back: Release Them to Avoid Regret

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“Waking up to who you are requires letting go of who you imagine yourself to be.” ~lan Watts   

Do you hear voices?

Even when you are alone, there is usually someone talking to you. And you hear them loud and clear.

Everyone has an internal dialogue going through their heads for a large part of the day. Just because you hear these “voices” it doesn’t mean you are crazy.

On the other hand, these voices can make you believe some crazy things.

Most of what these voices tell you is negative. And when you hear these negative things often enough, …

Why Enthusiasm Trumps Worrying When It Comes to Reaching Goals

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“Worry never robs tomorrow of its sorrow. It only saps today of its joy.” ~Leo Buscaglia

They say the greatest joy in life is to be able to live your passion every day, and I only had to look to my teens to remember that what I had always enjoyed doing most—working out. That’s where I wanted to go in life.

Held hostage by worries about the future, status, and money, I decided to head on a different path. I did well in college, graduating with a business degree and a double major in finance and accounting.

A few years …

Getting to Know Yourself, What You Like, and What You Want in Life

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“Be yourself; everyone is already taken” ~Oscar Wilde

In some ways, it may seem counterintuitive to have to learn to know yourself. Surely that should be a given, right? Not necessarily.

While our experiences clearly helped shape us into the people we are today, this does not mean that we necessarily know who we really are—what we are passionate about and what we want from life.

Since we were tiny, we’ve developed beliefs and values, some good and some not so good, as a result of our environment and the pressure from society to conform. 

When I was younger, I …

Changing Direction: It’s Not Too Late to Be Who You Want to Be

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“You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.” ~C.S. Lewis

Growing up, people always saw me as the over-achiever and said, “That girl is really going to make something of herself one day.”

I often felt the pressure of having to live up to these expectations.

I recently turned 30 and it was a day of reflection for me. I always had this idea that by the time I turned 30, I’d be one of the top celebrities in South Africa, living the life of a talented singer, a self-made millionaire, driving a …