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Posts tagged with “wisdom”

If You’re Feeling Judged: One Thing You Need to Understand

“Peace cannot be kept by force; it can only be achieved by understanding.” ~Albert Einstein

Most of us feel judged at times. We might feel judged for the way we look, the things we do (or don’t do), the things we say (and the way we say them), or for the things we believe.

We might respond to feeling judged by retreating inside ourselves, hiding, and silencing our voice, or we might react in defense or retaliation as if we’re being attacked.

It doesn’t feel good to feel judged. It can hurt, make us feel like we’re not good enough, …

How I Stopped Feeling Embarrassed and Ashamed of Being Single

“Be proud of who you are, not ashamed of how someone else sees you.” ~Unknown

“When was your last relationship?” my hairdresser asked as she twisted the curling wand into my freshly blow-dried hair.

“Erm, around two years ago.” I lied.

“Why did you break up?” she asked.

“Oh, he had a lot of issues. It wasn’t really working out.” I lied again.

I had gotten quite good at this, lying to hide my shame over being in my early thirties and never having been in a serious relationship. I had learned to think on my feet; that way, no …

It’s Okay to Never Go Back

All the Things I Didn’t Tell the Men I Dated Because I Was Afraid

I’ve recently been reflecting on my relationship history and how often I did things I wasn’t comfortable with instead of speaking up.

It would be easy to solely blame the men I’ve been with, but I’ve recognized I played a role by remaining silent instead of communicating my wants and needs and telling them when they were pushing my limits.

I have played a role in my own disrespect by swallowing my truth and showing a smile when I really felt uncomfortable.

I realize that everyone’s experiences are different, but if you can relate to what I wrote, perhaps you …

Open-Minded People

How to Show Up When Nothing About Your Life Is Perfect

“I saw that you were perfect, and so I loved you. Then I saw that you were not perfect, and I loved you even more.” ~Angelita Lim

I’m not a perfect parent. I’m not a perfect partner. I’m not in perfect health. I’m not a perfect friend. And I’m far from perfect with my finances.

Hell, nothing about my life is perfect. And guess what? I’ll never be able to attain perfection in those areas. And I’m sorry to say it, but neither will you.

Don’t be fooled by calling yourself a perfectionist. Perfection as a destination is what causes …

Don’t Take Unfair Criticism to Heart

Why I Didn’t Trust Myself to Make Decisions (and What If It’s All Okay?)

“Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?” ~Mary Oliver

Lately, I’ve been taking time to think about what I actually want. Not what I “should” want or what other people want for me.

One thing I have learned is that mistakes happen when you choose not to follow your inner guidance system. The problem is that, for many years, I chose not to listen to mine.

Whenever it screamed and pulled at me, desperate to get my attention (“Don’t purchase a car from that shady car dealership! Don’t go out with …

Congratulations to Everyone Who Moved On

Becoming Less Reactive

How I Stopped Worrying About Running Out of Time to Achieve My Goals

“The only thing that is ultimately real about your journey is the step that you are taking at this moment. That’s all there ever is.” ~Alan Watts

One thing that is promised to each one of us in life is death. No one will avoid dying or feeling the pain of losing others. From a young age I remember being aware of this fact, and it scared me.

As I got older, I began to feel a sense of pressure that I was running out of time and loss was imminent. The thought of losing my loved ones and …

Beyond Dry January: 5 Benefits of Extending Your Break from Alcohol

“Define success on your own terms, achieve it by your own rules, and build a life you’re proud to live.” ~Anne Sweeney

So many people make the positive choice to have a sober start to the year in January, whether it’s a New Year’s resolution, a detox, another wellness goal, or part of a fresh start program, but perhaps it’s worth considering prolonging the benefits further into the year ahead.

A break from alcohol is always a good thing, whether it’s a few days, a week, a month, or longer, and the bigger the break, the more you get a …

People Who Are Mean

7 Ways Childhood Trauma Shows Up in Your Romantic Relationships

“Love is the greatest miracle cure. Loving ourselves creates miracles in our lives.” ~Louise Hay

When you are unlucky in love, you tend to blame yourself for not being enough and maybe blame fate for not giving you a break already! Everyone else around you is in happy, long-term relationships, but you just can’t get there.

You might come to the conclusion that there is something wrong with you—you’re too old or too fat—and all the good ones are already married, and you will just die alone! You never think for one moment that your relationship history is playing out …

What If I Just Enjoy Life for What It Is Today?

How to Make Things Better When It Seems Like Everything Is Going Wrong

“You can never be happy if you’re trapped in the past and fearful of the future. Living in the present is the only way to be happy.” ~Unknown

Have you found that the local and world events of the last couple of years have taken their toll on you and your family and friends? With fires, floods, shortages of food, fuel, and medicine, illnesses, job losses, and more, all occurring in a short space of time, it can be hard to find anyone who has not been affected in some way.

Many people are experiencing feelings of hopelessness and living …

Provoking a Reaction

7 False Beliefs That Will Keep You Trapped in Your Head Forever

“There is only one cause of unhappiness: the false beliefs you have in your head, beliefs so widespread, so commonly held, that it never occurs to you to question them.” ~Anthony de Mello

When people come to me suffering from anxiety, fear, anger, self-judgment etc., there are five things they invariably believe to be true.

Let’s take anxiety as an example. Most (if not all) people with anxiety believe that:

1. It’s bad or wrong to feel anxious.
2. It shouldn’t be there.
3. There’s something wrong with me (for being anxious).
4. My mind should be peaceful.
5. I …

How I Learned the True Meaning of Strength After My Son’s Death

“Breathe. Let go. And remind yourself that this very moment is the only one you know you have for sure.” ~Oprah Winfrey

I tried to stay strong after my fifteen-year-old son Brendan died in an accident. It shattered my world. The shock of it numbed me but when that wore off, I knew I needed to be there for my husband and two other children. Zack and Lizzie were only ten and thirteen and needed my strength. So, I built a wall around my heart and pushed through my day. I went back to work, teaching piano students in my …

Parents Who Ask “Would You Like a Hug?”