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Posts by Lori Deschene

Lori Deschene is the founder of Tiny Buddha. She started the site after struggling with depression, bulimia, c-PTSD, and toxic shame so she could recycle her former pain into something useful and inspire others do the same. She recently created the Breaking Barriers to Self-Care eCourse to help people overcome internal blocks to meeting their needs—so they can feel their best, be their best, and live their best possible life. If you’re ready to start thriving instead of merely surviving, you can learn more and get instant access here.

Lori Deschene's Website

Take Your Power Back: 15 Things You Don’t Have to Do Anymore

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There’s little more frustrating than feeling stuck or trapped—like you have to accept things that aren’t good for you and can’t do the things you need to do to feel and be your best.

I think we all feel this way at times, and sometimes we do have to accept things that aren’t ideal, at least in the short term while we figure out a plan to make things better. Until we address our health issues, or find a less stressful job, or slowly unravel layers of grief or trauma to find some modicum of peace and healing.

But when …

10 Signs You’re Being True to Yourself

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“The most confused we ever get is when we try to convince our heads of something that we know in our hearts is a lie.” ~Karen Moning

It’s painful and stressful to feel like you’re living a lie. Like you’re hiding how you really feel, saying what you think other people want to hear, and doing things you don’t actually want to do—just because you think you’re supposed to.

But sometimes we don’t recognize we’re doing this. We just know we feel off, or something feels wrong, and we’re not sure how to change it.

It makes sense that a …

10 Things to Tell Yourself When Going Through a Hard Time

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When life gets challenging, we often make things even tougher by being hard on ourselves.

We berate ourselves for feeling down, as if we should be positive and happy all the time. We minimize our feelings, as if we have no right to be struggling since things could be so much worse. And we hold ourselves to ridiculous standards, pushing ourselves to do more, keep up with everyone else, and respond to life’s stressors with perfect composure.

Or at least these are things I’ve done.

I know that life is messy and I’m only human, but sometimes I expect more …

15 Things You Can’t Control and What You Can Control Instead (Free Printable!)

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This post is for anyone who stresses themselves out trying to control life. Which I’m guessing means it’s for most people.

It’s easy to convince ourselves we have power over things we don’t—as if we can force people and situations to go our way simply by trying or pushing harder.

The world would feel a lot safer if this were true. If people did what we thought was best, situations worked out as we believed they should, and nothing challenging or painful ever caught us off guard.

But some things are simply uncontrollable, and it’s exhausting and futile to obsess …

Does It All Feel Too Hard? Tiny Buddha’s Inner Strength Journal Can Help

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Do you ever feel like calling into the day? And I don’t just mean work. I mean everything. I mean turning it all off for a while. Freezing the full gamut of this messy human experience—the regrets, the fears, the adulting, the drama. The constant onslaught of anxiety-inducing news and personal problems to face.

When everyone needs you and everything worries you and nothing helps you feel better, it’s tempting to disconnect. To numb out, shut down, or give up.

But we can’t, at least not for long. And really, that’s not what we want. Or at least, that’s not …

Free Thich Nhat Hanh Audio Series: Living Without Stress or Fear

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When you think of the teachers who’ve had the greatest impact on your life, who comes to mind?

For me, it’s the calm, the humble, the patient—the people who not only imparted useful life lessons but also embodied their message with their grace and equanimity. People I was fortunate enough to know personally, like my grandmother, and others I never met that brought me clarity and peace from afar, like the inimitable Thich Nhat Hanh.

Thay, as his students called him, was a Vietnamese Zen monk, author, poet, peacemaker, and founder of the “engaged Buddhism” movement—the act of leveraging our …

20 Inspiring Acts of Kindness and Giveaway Winners for HumanKind

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Last week I ran a giveaway for Brad Aronson’s HumanKind: Changing the World One Small Act at a Time—a heartwarming book that highlights ordinary people doing extraordinary things and offers practical tips for everyday kindness.

I had ten books to give away—four for the blog, three for Facebook, and three for Instagram—and I invited you all to share an act of kindness you’d recently received or witnessed for a chance to win. The four blog winners, chosen at random, are:

Please email me at email (at) tinybuddha.com so I can get a book …

HumanKind: The Inspiring, Uplifting Book We All Need to Read (Giveaway!)

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A while back I shared a quote by an unknown author that reads:

“You know who’s going through a lot right now? Literally everyone. Just be kind.”

It got me thinking about all the struggles we assume other people don’t have—because we’d never guess from the looks of them.

You’d never guess that your confident colleague struggles with PTSD from childhood abuse and neglect.

You’d never guess that your boisterous brother-in-law beats himself up because he doesn’t earn enough to get his family out of debt.

You’d never guess that your collected cousin cries in the bathroom every day because …

10 Positive Things to Do for Yourself in the New Year

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I think I know you pretty well. I know I don’t know you, know you, but I’m guessing since you’re here, you’re a lot like me.

You want to be your best self. You want to make the most of your life. You want to be the best you can be, physically and mentally, for the people around you. And you quite possibly will take a little time today to think about what you should embrace or release in the year ahead to boost your happiness and make a positive impact on the world.

Maybe you’ll make a list …

Tiny Buddha’s 2022 Day-to-Day Calendar & Planner, Available Now!

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Hi friends! First things first, happy December. I hope you’re all enjoying the holiday season so far!

I’m excited to share that I’ve launched my first ever day-to-day desk calendar, along with an eco-friendly planner, for 2022.

The colorful daily calendar pages feature quotations (all from the Tiny Buddha blog) on happiness, love, relationships, change, meaning, mindfulness, simplicity, self-care, letting go, and more.

With an easel backer for desk and tabletop display, the calendar will hopefully keep you encouraged, uplifted, and motivated all through 2022!

As I write this, Amazon only has three calendars left in stock, with more …

7 Things You Need to Know If You’re Going Through a Painful Breakup

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Last year my uncle died shortly after someone I love went through a pretty traumatic breakup. I love all my family, but I wasn’t really close to my uncle and didn’t know him all that well, so I was more grieving for my mother and aunt than myself.

As I bore witness to the deep pain around me, I started thinking about the expectations we often hold of people when grieving a breakup, as opposed to grieving a death. We often expect them to feel sad for a while and then just get over it. Because the person didn’t die, …

10 Quotes You Need to Read If You Struggle with Anxiety

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Have you ever received well-intentioned advice while facing intense anxiety, only to feel judged, misunderstood, or condescended?

Like, “Calm down!” Or “Just be positive!” Or “Don’t worry so much!”

The people who try to help generally want to do just that, but it’s always easier to advise someone when you’re not feeling what they’re feeling, because you have the benefit of rational thought—which goes out the window when fight-or-flight mode takes over.

And if you’ve never felt the depth of anxiety some of us experience—perhaps because you weren’t conditioned that way through trauma, or you’ve learned to block or …

20 Powerful Self-Care Quotes to Help You Feel and Be Your Best

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Hi friends! I decided over this long holiday weekend to give myself a break for some much-needed self-care, which I imagine we could all use right now.

We’ve all been pushed, stretched, and challenged this year. We’ve all given our all, done our best, and perhaps wondered at times if it was good enough.

That’s the thing about difficult times—we often make them so much harder by expecting a lot from ourselves, pushing ourselves, and beating ourselves up when we fall short.

We expect ourselves to always be happy. Or productive. Or confident. Or present. Or there for other …

How to Make Someone Smile: 10 Mindful Acts of Kindness

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“The greatest gifts you can give someone are your time, your love, and your attention.” ~Unknown

The other day I saw this phrase on social media: “Spread kindness, not COVID-19.” And I started thinking about how kindness is contagious, which reminded me of a viral video I’ve always loved:

A skateboarding kid falls, and a construction worker helps him up. The kid then sees an elderly woman struggling with grocery bags and helps her carry them across the street. That woman then gives coins to a woman at a parking meter who’s rifling through her purse. And on and on …

How to Safely Enjoy the Pandemic Holidays

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“Surreal” is the word that keeps coming to mind. Life has felt like an alternative universe for quite a while now, and it feels even stranger during the holiday season.

After a year of much sacrifice, reality is requiring us to forgo traditions we hold dear and distance ourselves from people we may feel we’ve already gone too long without seeing.

And many are navigating the season with a sense of grief—for lost loved ones, lost purpose, maybe even lost hope.

Maybe that’s not you. Maybe you are full of gratitude for everything you have, and now appreciate even …

When Life Feels Too Hard: How to Mindfully Get Through the Day

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NOTE: This post contains a giveaway – details at the bottom of the post!

“If today gets difficult, remember the smell of coffee, the way sunlight bounces off a window, the sound of your favorite person’s laugh, the feeling when a song you love comes on, the color of the sky at dusk, and that we are here to take care of each other.” ~Nanea Hoffman

I am currently exhausted. Absolutely beat. I’ve taken on more work than I can comfortably accomplish in my available time, I’ve been feeling under the weather for a while, and my eighteen-month-old son …

40 Reasons You’re Amazing and Worth Appreciating

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I’m willing to bet that most of us spend far more time focusing on what we aren’t than appreciating who we are. We home in everything we think we lack and then feel bad about ourselves, when there’s actually a lot to celebrate if we take the time recognize it.

It’s partly a byproduct of our time: We’re constantly inundated with pics and stories narrating everyone else’s lives, when really, they’re just highlight reels. They’re the filtered, photoshopped version of lives as messy and imperfect as ours.

And regardless of where they pose, what they wear, or what they’re …

Free Recreate Your Life Story eCourse ($97 value) with Tiny Buddha’s Mindfulness Kit

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**Today, Monday the 30th, is the last day to get the Recreate Your Life Story eCourse as a free bonus with Tiny Buddha’s Mindfulness kit!

Another surreal holiday in the books, for those of us in the US that is.

I hope you all had a love-filled Thanksgiving, even if that love was sent from afar.

I was 3,000 miles away from my family, though fortunate to be with my boyfriend’s parents.

After I ate way too much tofurkey and pie I spent a little time reading all the comments on this week’s giveaway post, and I felt both sad …

7 Morning Mindfulness Practices to Help You Have an Awesome Day

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How often do you feel energized, grounded, and excited for the day when you finish your morning routine?

And what is your morning routine?

Are you one of those people who sleep as late as possible, pound some coffee and a processed breakfast, and then rush to get into work on time? (No judgment—I’ve been there! Gas station java and pop tarts for the win!)

Or do you leave yourself a cushion of time so you can ease into your day feeling centered and invigorated, through some combination of self-care activities?

In recent years I’ve leaned toward the latter because …

Giveaway: Win Tiny Buddha’s Mindfulness Kit for You and a Loved One!

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UPDATE: The winner for this giveaway, chosen at random, is: Beth Gallager

Please contact me at email@tinybuddha.com with your address so I can send you your kits! I wish I could send a kit to everyone who commented, but since I can’t, I’m extending this offer here.

There’s no denying it’s a strange holiday season this year. Annual traditions are on hold for many. Loved ones are far away. And I imagine most of us are getting antsy for a return to some semblance of normal.

While a lot feels different this year, there’s one thing that remains the …