Forum Replies Created
-
Hi Everyone!
Today’s topic when reading Four Illusions is pain.
It describes suffering as physical pain, parting from what is pleasant, meeting what is unpleasant, wanting and not getting what one wants.
Everyone experiences pain. Sometimes pain lies to us and has us believe that we are uniquely special in our pain and that no one else could understand it for the subject of pain differs.
I have health issues and chronic pain. It has helped me to reassess my priorities. At one point I could not even stand or walk. Often we take for granted what we have, but when we lose it, it can be very difficult to recover. Chronic pain called into question every activity. Everyone has likes and dislikes. Would you do something that you disliked if it caused you immense pain? Stress worsens my pain so I had to reconsider the stressors that I allow into my life. I considered what I wanted from life, what truly brings me happiness.
I have experienced suffering the book described. The tools I have learned to soothe it are self-compassion and patience. Life often dictates what happens to us, it doesn’t follow our whims. It takes time and effort to achieve many things.
Once I saw a beautiful cathedral. The inside was ornate and lacquered with gold. It was a testament to the love of God. I considered the devotion of many people that enabled the gathering of resources to achieve this. This cathedral was built over many generations. It took 150 years to build. I imagined sons, fathers and grandparents passing on the skills needed to achieve this. The hard work throughout a lifetime to create something that wouldn’t be fully actualised until long after their passing.
Hi Haasini
My condolences. I’m very sorry to hear about your difficulties with your husband, his family and the miscarriage.
I have a question. Why do you want this marriage? You have been treat horribly by both your husband and his family. Why do you want to continue to have a relationship with them? Surely this would only lead to more abuse and more pain.
Regardless, we cannot impose our will on another. We can only manage our own actions. It sounds like your husband has made his decision.
Hi Greenshade!
It has been a pleasure speaking with you!
Awh, thanks! No, it has been more like my personal agenda than an organizational priority. I think I could still collaborate with my future colleagues in the future though to work on this if I were to leave things on a good enough note.
If it is up to you, I am confident that you would manage to leave on a good note. This idea of collaborating with colleagues to continue to achieve your personal goals sounds like a good plan.
“Yes, I do communicate this stuff. They still get angry. Yes, thank you for the reminder!”
It’s unfortunate that your manager doesn’t have better control over their behaviour. I’m sorry that you have to deal with their emotional outbursts. This definitely sounds like a stressful work environment. Well done for coping with the stress for so long! But you do deserve better.
I have been in a similar situation myself and honestly, I was relieved to finally walk away from that environment. I have been very lucky because the environment in my most recent job has been entirely different. It’s a breath of fresh air when coworkers are professional, kind and supportive.
Oh, I don’t know if this will be helpful, but how I managed my anxiety at the poor work environment was by understanding that these people are behaving in this way not because of me or anyone else. But because of poor coping mechanisms. They do not have healthy skill sets that allow them to cope with stressors.
I have a couple of questions. Before the more recent role you worked there in a previous role. How was your anxiety then? How did you cope then?
Though I run this site, it is not mine. It's ours. It's not about me. It's about us. Your stories and your wisdom are just as meaningful as mine. 