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Posts tagged with “Change”

When Things Don’t Go As Planned: Transform Disappointment into Action

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“A man’s errors are his portals of discovery.” ~James Joyce

I’ve had a bit of experience with disappointment. I got very motivated to change my relationship with it when I was in my twenties and starting my acupuncture practice.

I knew it would take time to build my client base; what I didn’t realize, or more likely was in denial about, was that a very effective way of doing that was by arranging public speaking gigs. I absolutely hated public speaking. Big disappointment.

I also didn’t consider how much work running a business really was. I had to talk to …

9 Insights on Dealing with Change, Challenges, and Pain

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“The only way to make sense out of change is to plunge into it, move with it, and join the dance.” ~Alan Watts

This year has been one of unprecedented change for me. From January to March, I traveled to Mozambique, Africa to do volunteer work. I did not speak the language; I did not understand the culture. I was immersed in a completely strange world for two months.

In April, we put our house up for sale. The prospect of uprooting and moving is destabilizing, and one of life’s biggest stressors.

Then in May my marriage failed, and I …

4 Ways to Embrace Slow Change When You’re Feeling Impatient

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“Change is not a process for the impatient.” ~Barbara Reinhold

I love it when change happens quickly. Sometimes things just click, and everything shifts all at once.

When I met the man who’d become my husband, we were married only thirteen months later, and in those thirteen months we both transformed to our very cores.

The problem is that those thirteen months aren’t the entire story. They cut off the three years of intense personal work I did before I met him, all the while wishing to be in a healthy relationship.

Without those three years of work …

Finding the Courage to Let Go of the Familiar and Make a Change

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“Courage is the power to let go of the familiar.” ~Raymond Lindquist

I’ve been processing my beliefs on courage since I turned 31.

When I was in my 20s and teens, my idea of courage was that you fight until the death, never give up, be the one to say the last word, and always, always prove your point. And yet, I spent most of those years feeling unseen and unheard by my family and friends.

I felt completely isolated and exhausted, yet I wasn’t expressing these feelings. (Not to say I hold regret; in my journey I had …

Embracing Change and Living with Passion: Awaken your Phoenix Spirit

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“All the wonders you seek are within yourself.” ~Sir Thomas Browne

As history claims, the phoenix began as a common bird that’s nest caught on fire by the hand of a god-like figure. As the fire started to consume the bird, instead of suffering, she decided to dance in the flames.

Eventually, the fire reduced the bird to ashes. However, this was not the end of that wise bird, for she knew her ending was only the beginning—the beginning of something greater than what she ever thought possible, a resurrection.

The seemingly done-for bird emerged, more powerful and more …

3 Powerful Insights About Finding Yourself and Creating Change

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“Get out of your head and get into your heart. Think less, feel more.” ~Osho

When you’re on a spiritual quest in the chaotic outlying suburbs of Bangkok, and you’re having a complete and utter meltdown about your ability to face your inner demons and greatest life fears, where should you turn?

Well, I feel well qualified to answer this question, having been in that exact situation!

Where I turned was a peaceful little Buddhist temple, and more specifically a gentle and elderly monk named Yut.

Don’t be deceived by the “gentle and elderly” description, however, for Yut was also …

Are You Happy?

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How to Find the Motivation to Change Your Life When You Don’t Feel Capable or Worthy

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“Eventually you will come to realize that love heals everything, and love is all there is.” ~Gary Zukav

Following a path of personal development isn’t easy. Oh, it’s rewarding and can be life changing, but it can also be confusing, challenging, and scary.

What if you take the wrong path? How do you know which piece of advice is right? Can you still get the results you desperately want, even if you go against some of the assumed wisdom?

One such piece of wisdom is that people should make changes in their lives and their behavior for themselves, not for …

Create Your Life: Having Nothing Can Mean Having Everything

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“Breakdowns can create breakthroughs. Things fall apart so things can fall together.” ~Unknown

A decade ago, as a nomadic adventure-seeker, I traveled and lived in Belize. I’ve always been a dream chaser, which means if I dream it, I start living it.

My twenty-year-old self was convinced living the island life in the soulful country of Belize was my dream and gateway to happiness.

After about a year of a major reality check—living on an island is very different than vacationing on an island! I felt totally empty. I felt like I had nothing.

Seriously, I had no job …

What Would Happen If You Did? (And Other Questions That Can Change Your Life)

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“If it’s still in your mind, it is worth taking the risk.” ~ Paulo Coelho

I felt stuck. Why could I never achieve anything? Why could I never do anything tangible?

Everyone else seemed to have no problem. You see, my friends could both work hard and grow themselves at the same time.

Not me.

I felt stuck.

Every day when I came home after work I was just exhausted. I had no energy whatsoever to study my Chinese Mandarin (a long-term project of mine) or to go for a jog in the nearby forest. All my energy had been …

Anyone Can Change If They Take It One Step at a Time

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“Waking up to who you are requires letting go of who you imagine yourself to be.” ~Alan Watts

I used to be an insecure girl obsessed with her weight, stepping on the scales about twenty times a day.

I used to be a bulimic teenager struggling with depression and a way too controlling father, whom I never told, “I love you, Dad.”

I used to be a lonely woman who always fell for the wrong men because she had not yet learned that she deserved better.

I used to be co-dependent, fighting for everyone but myself.

I used to …

13 Ways to Change When Life Changes Around You

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“We must always change, renew, rejuvenate ourselves; otherwise we harden.” ~Johann Von Goethe

When my first love died suddenly, my life changed dramatically and permanently. Barely twenty-two at the time, I had no coping skills and no support system. I couldn’t anticipate how deep sorrow would render me completely devastated and heartbroken.

As a result, I engaged in extremely self-destructive behavior. I believed I was going “with the flow,” but in truth I did so many reckless things that I’m surprised I survived. I didn’t know how to deal with my anguish in any other way.

Because life was obviously …

When Things Fall Apart: Breakdowns Can Create Breakthroughs

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“Breakdowns can create breakthroughs. Things fall apart so things can fall together.” ~Unknown

“I’m sorry,” the email said, “but our phone call left me feeling uncomfortable, and we’ve decided to work with someone else.”

I felt like I’d been punched in the gut. Even though I saw it coming. Even though I’d brought it on myself.

It was February 2010, and I didn’t have the money to pay my mortgage. My savings were gone, burned through in a misguided attempt to breathe life back into my ailing business by “throwing money at the problem.”

As a ketubah artist—a maker of …

5 Ways to Thrive When Life Feels Chaotic and Uncertain

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“All great changes are preceded by chaos.” ~Deepak Chopra

A personal tempest blew through the doors and windows of my life, and I am forever changed. Think major upheaval in every area of your life. Conjure Dorothy Gale, Robinson Crusoe, Job, yeah them.

In the process, I’ve learned that the disorienting storms of life are not just about survival but of learning to thrive. It is not in spite of daunting circumstances that we grow but because of them.

For three years, painful and unexpected events descended all at once. My long-term marriage, often filled with anger, hurt, mistrust, …

Today Can Be the Day You Turn Things Around

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“In chaos, there is fertility.” ~Anais Nin

How did I get to this point?

This question pulsed through my brain repeatedly as I drove to my parents’ house in a state of complete exhaustion. My young daughter was strapped in the back seat, my pregnant belly pushing against the steering wheel, hot tears streaming down my face.

I was done. I had nothing left to give. How did I get here?

Gradually, then suddenly.

With eternal gratitude to Hemingway, three simple words so elegantly summarize how I ended up in a situation I didn’t want or expect.

“How did you …

You Have the Power to Change Someone’s Day for the Better

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“It is one of the most beautiful compensations of life that no man can sincerely try to help another without helping himself.” ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

It’s a feeling of dread. Maybe you’ve experienced it before.

You’re driving down the highway and suddenly something goes wrong. You’re stepping on the gas pedal but nothing is happening.

All the little lights on the dashboard come on and you notice one particular gauge you’ve been meaning to address sooner.

The needle is just past the E. You’re out of gas. 

It’s a helpless feeling. Desperation flashes through your mind as the wheels begin …

How to Deal With Change When Change Is Hard

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“You must welcome change as the rule but not your ruler” ~Denis Waitley

My name is Hannah, and I find it hard to deal with change.

As much as I used to want to think of myself as flexible and easy-going, I struggle to live up to these ideals. I like to know where I am, what I’m doing, where I’m going, and to have my near future mapped out in lists, to-dos, and ideas. In short, I do whatever I can to minimize the level of uncertainty in my life.

My discomfort around uncertainty means I am usually …

Making Changes When the People Around You Resist Your Plan

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“The greatest step toward a life of simplicity is to learn to let go.” ~Steve Maraboli

So I took the plunge. I stated out loud that I wanted to simplify my life.

I wanted to have a life where what I did for a living and how I lived were more in balance with the person I am and aspired to be. The waterfall effect of that verbal declaration catapulted my life into a stratosphere of change that I am still learning to just “go with.”

Three weeks after that declaration, I got “downsized” at work. Okay, I thought, the …

Accept Yourself as You Are, Even When Others Don’t

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“What other people think of me is none of my business.” ~Wayne Dyer

“You’re too quiet.”

This comment and others like it have plagued me almost all my life. I don’t know how many times I’ve been told that I needed to come out of my shell, to be livelier, or to talk more.

As a child and teenager, I allowed these remarks to hurt me deeply. I was already shy, but I became even more self-conscious as I was constantly aware of people waiting for me to speak.

When I did, the response was often, “Wow! Louise …

Make a Tough Situation Good: One Question That Changes Everything

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“The last of one’s freedoms is to choose one’s attitude in any given circumstance.” ~Viktor E. Frankl

For my livelihood, I lead workshops on how to let go of stress and experience deeper happiness. My occupation makes my occasional meltdowns all the more embarrassing. Fortunately, a meltdown I had last year led me to a question that completely changed how I view difficult situations in my life.

As I was checking in at the airport a few months ago, I was told I did not have a ticket for my cross-country flight. Fortunately, I had my confirmation number with …