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Posts tagged with “wisdom”

Letting Go of Expectations and Letting Joy Find You

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“The best things in life are unexpected, because there were no expectations.” ~Eli Khamarov

Are there situations in your life where letting go of a desired outcome could potentially improve the outcome?

I’d been invited to the Stern Grove festival, the free summer concert series, to see Andrew Bird. A friend of mine texted me the night before, letting me know he was setting up a picnic for it.

I was feeling agitated that evening after spending more than I’d wanted to at a birthday dinner (which I was happy to attend, notwithstanding), and I anticipated wanting to recharge …

Unbecoming Who You Are and Embracing Your True Self

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“View your life with kindsight. Stop beating yourself up about things from your past. Instead of slapping your forehead and asking, ‘What was I thinking,’ breathe and ask yourself the kinder question, ‘What was I learning?’” ~Karen Salmonsohn

I’ve never been particularly risk adverse.

If you asked my friends or family, they’d tell you I’d be the first person to try something new and challenging. I did things in my twenties with very little thought about the consequences and dove headlong into many situations without batting an eyelid.

Except, I was avoiding one thing and that was the real me. …

I Want a Partner Who…

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Source: NotSalmon.com

5 Tips to Create a Loving Relationship, With Fewer Disappointments

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“Love does not obey our expectations; it obeys our intentions.” ~Lloyd Strom

Have you ever felt less about a relationship when it didn’t exactly pan out like a fairy tale? I sure did.

I had it stuck in my mind that a great relationship should be picture perfect.

When reality would give me a sobering slap showing it was far from perfect, I would walk away from a relationship that refused to meet my standards.

I thought that a relationship is like a flower in a pot, ever blooming by itself. No hard work whatsoever. But the “flower” also has …

Healing from Heartbreak and Loving Life, No Matter Your “Status”

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“Getting over a past relationship is much like crossing monkey bars. You have to let go at some point to move forward.” ~C.S. Lewis

I recently stumbled into a clothing store where everything was full of life and color, until I saw the sales clerk.

She had obviously been crying. I perused the merchandise and hesitatingly asked her a question about an item. Tears welled up in her eyes and she said, “I’m sorry, I’m so overwhelmed. My boyfriend just broke up with me.”

I wasn’t prepared for that answer, but as I looked at her more closely I saw …

Worry Is…

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Why Uncertainty Isn’t So Bad and How to Embrace It

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“Trust the wait. Embrace the uncertainty. Enjoy the beauty of becoming. When nothing is certain, anything is possible.” ~Mandy Hale

Sitting in the auditorium during orientation, I listened to various deans, distinguished alumni, and student leaders drone on about the rigors of earning a law degree.

There were obligatory mentions of not everyone making it to graduation (or even the end of the first week) and of the intense strain on personal relationships.

But the message I remembered most clearly was about uncertainty.

“You better get comfortable with gray areas. And fast. Because the legal field is not a place …

Finding a Window of Opportunity When Life Closes a Door

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“Things work out best for those who make the best of how things work out.” ~John Wooden

“Why don’t you just take up swimming?” the doctor asked.

I was twenty years old, single-minded in my pursuit of a dance career, visiting yet another doctor about the vicious tendinitis that had forced me to give up my spot at the prestigious Juilliard School in New York City.

What the doctor didn’t understand is that dance isn’t just a sporting activity; it’s a way of life, an identity.

Telling a young dancer to “just take up swimming” is about as helpful …

Stress Is Not What Happens to Us

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How to Quit or Move On Without Feeling Guilty

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“Some people think it’s holding on that makes one strong–sometimes it’s letting go.” ~Unknown

When I accepted a position with a small company, I thought I had found everything I wanted: challenging work in my field, flexible hours, a laid-back atmosphere, and a short commute.

My new job seemed to be perfect, but soon I realized it wasn’t.

While I loved the kind of work I did, the “casual” atmosphere ended up being too casual. Hearing racy jokes and mocking comments became part of my workday. The jokes seemed to become more offensive as days went by.

Then the gossip …

When You Lack Focus and Direction: Stop Looking for Your “Thing”

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“More important than the quest for certainty is the quest for clarity.” ~Francois Gautier

Isn’t it funny—and annoying and brilliant—how often things turn out to be nothing like we thought they would?

Six years ago I was recovering from a breakdown and reacquainting myself with my long dormant artistic side, and I remember spending a lot of time wondering what my “thing” was.

You know, that one specific thing in this life that I was destined to do to be fulfilled, and ideally from which I would earn a comfortable living.

I had always loved creativity, and particularly art, and …

Overthinking

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Rethinking Mistakes and Recognizing the Good in “Bad” Choices

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“Sometimes the wrong choices bring us to the right places.” ~Unknown

For most of my life, I’ve seen the world in black and white, and I’ve felt constricted and pained as a result.

When I was a young girl, I believed there were good people and bad people, and I believed I was bad.

When I was an adolescent, I believed there was good food and bad food, and because everything tasty fell into the latter category, I channeled the shame from feeling bad into bulimia.

And when I grew into adulthood, I believed there were good decisions and bad …

5 Helpful Things to Do When You Think Life Sucks

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“It isn’t what happens to us that causes us to suffer; it’s what we say to ourselves about what happens.” ~Pema Chodron

You know that foreboding fear we all have—that something will go terribly wrong and life will never be the same again?

Mine is that something will happen to our daughter. She is our only child. We battled infertility for years before conceiving her. I keep telling myself that it’s just an irrational fear and that every parent probably has it to some extent, but it’s a constant companion that stealthily follows me around everywhere I go.

So, on …

Are You Frustrated in Your Search for True, Unconditional Love?

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“Your task is not to seek love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.” ~Rumi

Have you ever wondered if there is such a thing as true love, like in the good old movies of Casablanca or The Notebook? Maybe you’ve found your true love. Or perhaps you’re still searching.

When I was a teenager, I was mesmerized by this dream that someday there would be someone who would love me so unconditionally that he would literally die for me. After all, you see that all the time in …

The Most Important Thing to Ask Yourself After a Breakup

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“The obstacles of your past can become the gateways that lead to new beginnings.” ~Ralph Blum

Divorce. Not an activity that I ever had on my to-do list and not something I contemplated when I got engaged in Paris. Who does?

We’ve all heard the statistics that one in three marriages ends in divorce. Yet this is something that happens to someone else and certainly not a possibility to focus on while skipping down the aisle.

People change or they don’t, as the case may be. Unless both parties are exceptional communicators, it can be challenging to stay on the …

To Discover New Oceans…

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Source: Daily Inspirational Quotes

3 Keys to Jumpstarting Your Life If You’ve Been Living on Hold

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“It is not uncommon for people to spend their whole lives waiting to start living.” ~Eckhart Tolle

One key lesson I learned on my journey to developing my business knowledge base is that everything is built from the ground up, and each stage has important lessons for the subsequent stages. Sometimes we are only privy to the first stages.

Other times, we only see the middle and final stages. These are the times when we are wowed at how fast things have happened for others, and we become insecure and worried about the pace of our growth.

No one …

A 10-Step Guide to Uncovering the Wisdom in Anxious Thoughts

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“Nothing ever goes away until it has taught us what we need to know.” ~Pema Chodron

Contained within your fears is genuine wisdom waiting to be discovered. Don’t underestimate this.

In order to tap into this wisdom, you must interview your fears, meeting them with curiosity and compassion. Allow them to speak their wisdom to you. Listen deeply; get into the details in order pin down exactly what they are trying to communicate. Honor whatever it is you find.

You see, these fears are like little children. They will kick and scream until you meet them with empathy. So do …

Your Life Is a Series of Moment

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Source: NotSalmon.com