Dear Anita,

You are right, you are absolutely right.  Thank you for reiterating this.

Guess what? You’re the first person I have told:

My husband gave his resignation today for this job. This exhausting, terrible, soul sucking job!

Congratulations to him – and us!

Dear Anita,

Yes! You know how I value our connection!

I haven’t told my work yet.  I haven’t been so vocal about all of these forthcoming changes with my friends because I am avoiding what old CC would do: take everyone’s input and diminish her own voice.

This is the decision of myself and husband, no more.  And thus there is no need to bring on too many voices at this time.  Simplicity is key.

Our talks though, that is entirely different!

Dear Anita,

Unnecessary noise prevention! Yes!

How are you doing? How have you been feeling?

Dear Anita,

Good option to have! Why not! the treadmill I mean

Noise prevention is key, no matter what neighborhoods we live in right? Living in NYC does not mean I have more internal noise in my head, and living in the mountains does not mean less.  It is all in the state of mind.

You reiterated several times the zero aggression policy with my husband.  How important, and how rewarding.

Having the flu and then traveling to CA and going to meetings and interviews – well that is a bonding experience if I ever had one.  The care and concern he took for me, and the way we were able to “power through” together was amazing.

I didn’t make that week about anyone else except him.  Yes, there some hiccups – but I quickly re-centered myself.

In your Ursula post, you mentioned that when others take my time, my roar gets louder – indeed it does.

It feels like they are scraping an already empty pot.  During this flu week I learned how to assert myself and my needs and boundaries.  The other party did not necessarily understand – but it didn’t matter this time.  It did NOT matter.

The other thing is that although that whole time was frenzied, we managed to take our time.  How ironic! It is because we made time for our thoughts, not those outside of ourselves.  No one else was involved.

We are in between 2 jobs.

1- San Diego

2- Newport Beach/Orange county

Location wise – love love love SD.

Job wise, both different in many ways.

I wonder what location you like better… I will tell you more about the jobs in my next post

• This reply was modified 5 years, 1 month ago by Cali Chica.

Dear Anita,

I agree.

We will be in Southern OC in the coastal area, so weather will be similar to SD.  Yet, I prefer the vibe in SD much more – and the breezy aspect.  The people are also less uptight – for many different reasons that are varied.

So the jobs – I am only focusing on his jobs here, as my jobs are secondary at this time as i have many more options in both areas.  The decision will be based on what the best is overall of course.

1- San Diego

There is a large surgical group that is looking to hire an additional surgeon as there is a need due to patient volume.  It is in a great location and we would be able to live in one of the many amazing coastal beach towns and commute will be easy.

The surgeons in the group are very laid back and family oriented.  We spend a good amount of time with them, and they try hard to maintain a work life balance from what we experienced. Financially they seem to do pretty well, and are not killing themselves to work too too crazy.

Overall theme: laid back

1- Newport Beach

As you know an affluent area, with a more competitive edge.  Likewise the job is similar.  This opportunity is very different.

There is a well known, renowned surgeon let’s call him B, that has built this large empire almost.  He himself has operated on many celebrities, and has an incredible reputation.  He is in his 60s.  Over the years he has hired younger surgeons and taking them on as almost an apprentice so to speak.  Hiring them, supporting them with a salary, helping them get busy.  In a year or 2 these surgeons then are able to be more independent.  Financially this practice does much better, but of course it is more work it seems and more entrepreneurial.  Someone like my husband would spend a year or 2 ramping up his practice, and then be independently able to thrive – as the plan would be.  He would have financial opportunities to make a cut of what the whole practice makes, which appears to  be quite lucrative.  B is very well connected and wants to take me on as a pain management and wellness doctor/expert – and help develop my career as well.  With him I would have opportunities to do so- and many of the things we have talked about in the past years.

Overall theme: “go getter”

• This reply was modified 5 years, 1 month ago by Cali Chica.

Dear Anita,

Excellent question.  no he is not, in fact that surgeon we visited 2 years ago used to work for this current one, B – small world, we learned of this during our visit- but that one went off on his own from B.  This current surgeon B stated that the other wasn’t so great, and went off on his own to build a name and wanted his own “empire”.  I do believe this as we got a weird vibe from that other one at the end of it all, he seemed money hungry and wanted younger surgeons to make himself more succesful it seems – and decided to not pursue it.

Of course have to take everything with a grain of salt when meeting new people, whatever B says.

B is already extremely successful on his own, has an incredible name and practice, and will look to retire in the next 5-8 years or so.  He wants to continue to expand his brand and what he has built.  He last hired a young surgeon 3 years ago, whom we met.  And is looking to now add someone new as his volume continues to grow.

In both of these scenarios it won’t be that way of not having money until later on –  as he will be supported financially with a salary day one.  That prior surgeon was asking for a lot of overhead costs from my husband to be paid in the first year – even while he would be ramping up and not so busy yet with patients as he would be new. That prior surgeon appears to be someone who wants to use younger surgeons.

Neither of these practices expect this, they are fair, and will support financially in the first year of ramping up

• This reply was modified 5 years, 1 month ago by Cali Chica.
• This reply was modified 5 years, 1 month ago by Cali Chica.
• This reply was modified 5 years, 1 month ago by Cali Chica.

Dear Anita,

Thank you for your feedback.  I like when you are direct and honest – that is what talking like this is all about!

So a lot of what you stated is correct.

Especially the aspect of this man having an ego, and knowing this prestige of his will attract young surgeons.

However, he also has a reputation for being a great surgeon and a good man – based on some of the other colleagues we know in the area.  The ruler, one, of the empire is correct though.

As far as younger surgeons being the minions.  The surgeon who joined a few years ago was helped by B to get busy.  He is now independently busy and takes home the money he makes after paying the overhead.  That is it.  So the busier the surgeon is the better he will do, as busy as he wants to be in a way.

The amount that my husband or any other one would share from the gross outcome of the whole practice will be based on percentages signed in a contract.  We are not looking to become like B, just want my husband to have more flexibility in his life and ability to make use of his talent.  Which he would be able to do in both practices.

As far as my opportunity.  B would employ me and I would get referrals for pain management, I would then be able to send surgical candidates to my husband – further enhancing his productivity when those situations arise.  It isn’t exactly like the actress situation as I would be a contracted physician in his group, just like another pain management doctor he has from 10 years ago who is saturated and has a need to share with another doctor now.  I have a phone call with this physician next week.

Yes what you said about SD is ABSOLUTELY correct – in the sense of more laid back, less ago, and family oriented.  We will review the numbers and contracts for both to see growth potential and all – and also compare different details.  In San Diego my husband may have to be on call certain times, in Newport – will not.

There is a lot to consider and there is at least a month to go back and forth, more phone calls, talks, thoughts, etc.

First and foremost – there are 2 great options!