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Search Results for "past relationship" — 1208 posts

How to Release the Fear That Keeps Our Lives Small

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“Being cut off from our own natural self-compassion is one of the greatest impairments we can suffer.” ~Gabor Mate

It was late at night, and I couldn’t sleep. I could almost hear the thudding of fear that was exploding in my chest. I tried to identify the singular cause of the fear, but it didn’t feel like there was just one thing.

There were so many things.

It was the world at large and problems in it; it was how my kid was feeling this morning when they got home from school. It was the rift between my husband and …

My Husband Left Me for Another Woman: How Forgiveness Set Me Free

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“Allow yourself to be proud of yourself and all the progress you’ve made. Especially the progress no one else can see.” ~Unknown

I watched my then-four-month-old daughter wiggle around on the floor on her belly, arms flailed out to the side in her pink-footed pajamas, giggling hysterically. Her brother, four years old at the time, was launching himself from our king size bed onto a pile of pillows next to her, over and over. He’d land with a thud and a loud “oof,” cracking himself up,and she would break out in hysterics right with him.

I

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How I Went from Approval Seeking to Authentic Living

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“My life transformed when I stopped caring what people in the stands thought.” ~Brené Brown

One afternoon, I had coffee with a friend who told me that she and her family all have a garden campfire every Friday night and toast marshmallows. It sounded so rustically idyllic compared to our normal frozen pizza and movie tradition that I asked my husband if we could do the same that evening.

He sat down to pick up the remote control and casually replied that he was too tired to build a fire, then thought nothing more of it. But I felt devastated …

Being Grateful for the Peaceful Coexistence of Joy and Pain

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“It’s a gift to exist, and with existence comes suffering. There’s no escaping that, but if you are grateful for your life, then you must be grateful for all of it.” ~Stephen Colbert

Life is not a war; you do not conquer it, nor do you overcome it. You simply accept that suffering is an inevitable and necessary rite of passage on our paths throughout life.

No one is immune to pain; it is only dished out at different levels, and our own internal experience is incomparable. We share similar human experiences—that is the tie that binds us all together—but …

How I Overcame Self-Hatred and 6 Ways to Love Yourself

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“You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.” ~Sharon Salzberg

When was the last time you looked at your reflection and extended love to yourself? Before I discovered the life-changing power of self-love, I had not extended love to myself for years. This is the story of how I transformed my self-hatred into self-love, how it changed my life, and several tips to practice in your life.

For a long time, I believed self-love was something to be avoided at all costs. Like many, I had become habituated to the “hustle and …

Trapped in Shame: How I Found Mental Freedom After Prison

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“If you put shame in a petri dish, it needs three ingredients to grow exponentially: secrecy, silence, and judgment. If you put the same amount of shame in the petri dish and douse it with empathy, it can’t survive.” ~Brené Brown

I was in two prisons.

One physical. One mental.

The physical version was Otisville Federal Prison.

I was living so out of alignment with who I was and who I wanted to become and self-sabotaged in a colossal way, defrauding one of the largest tech companies in the world.

My mental prison, my personal hell, was the all-consuming …

The Alchemy of a Broken Heart: How to Transform Your Pain into Purpose

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“Life changes. You lose love. You lose friends. You lose pieces of yourself that you never imagined would be gone. And then, without you even realizing it, these pieces come back. New love enters. Better friends come along. And a stronger, wiser you is staring back in the mirror.” ~Preetham Mohanty

One year ago, I quit my high-stress job. Then my husband quit me.

There had been signs of our unhappiness in the six months prior, but I thought it was dissatisfaction with our work lives, not with our relationship. It was clear, though, that our dynamic had changed—we were …

How Trauma Affects the Brain and How I’m Healing from PTSD

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“Owning our story and loving ourselves through that process is the bravest thing that we’ll ever do.” ~Brené Brown 

Several months ago, I was stoked about writing a piece on the living legacy of trauma, sharing how much we think we know about these so-called injuries of the mind, body, and spirit when, in reality, we know diddly squat.

I thought that a piece on this topic would inform and help folks like me. I’d suffered long and hard from PTSD, triggered initially by the sudden death of my brother and, simultaneously, the unfortunate finding of an email that confirmed

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Copy of Books & Things

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2024 CALENDAR

Tiny Buddha 2024 Day-to-Day Calendar

Stay inspired, motivated & encouraged with a year of uplifting quotes on happiness, relationships, change, self-care, and more. Includes tear-off pages, day/date reference on each page, and combined weekend pages. Features an easel backer for desk or tabletop display. Printed on FSC-certified paper with soy-based ink.
More Info

GEAR

Every design is available in: tee, organic tee, hoodie, and sweatshirt, with multiple colors and sizes.

Sorry, we couldn't find any products. Please

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How I Finally Starved the Disorder That Was Eating Me Alive

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“If we are ready to tear down the walls that confine us, break the cage that imprisons us, we will discover what our wings are for.” ~Michael Meegan

It’s weird, isn’t it? One day you’re playing hide and seek with friends without a worry beyond the playdate you’re having or dinner options for that night. But in a blink, those carefree days vanish. That’s what happened to me, and my teenage years started ticking away right in front of my eyes. Eleven, thirteen, fifteen, seventeen, nineteen…

And a realization hit me: “It’s still eating me alive.”

Maybe it wasn’t …

Why True Happiness Is Not Just About Reaching Your Goals

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“Success isn’t about how your life looks to others. It’s about how it feels to you.” ~Michelle Obama

Do you have goals? Why do you have these goals? What will change if you accomplish them?

Will you be happy?

Think about this for a second: You’ve already achieved goals that you said would make you happy.

Pause.

Think about that again.

You’ve already achieved goals that you said would make you happy.

Well, that’s a humbling reality check, isn’t it? So why aren’t you experiencing everlasting happiness and satisfaction?

No matter the goal’s size, the reward level, or the …

7 Steps to Deconstruct Your Anger So It No Longer Controls You

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“Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.” ~Buddha

For as long as I can remember I’ve struggled with anger.

My earliest memories of my anger are from junior high school, but it was around much earlier than that.

The only emotion that was ever shown in my house growing up was anger. My dad had an anger problem, and my mother showed no emotion at all. This is what emotional normal looked like to me—either nothing or anger.

I was the …

Why It’s Hard to Hold a Boundary and How to Make It Easier

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“The only real conflict you will ever have in your life won’t be with others, but with yourself.”  ~Shannon Adler

I sat in my chemistry class during my junior year of high school staring at the periodic table and wondering if I was going to make it through. Bored and lost, I struggled to find value in the class or make sense of why I was there. It felt purposeless.

Until I met Kevin.

Kevin sat a few seats away from me and was a senior. I knew of him, but I had never really noticed or paid attention to …

How I’m Learning to Feel Confident Without Approval

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“Children need to feel seen. Adults do, too.” ~Unknown

As a teenager, I played the flute for about nine years. I never practiced—apart from that guilt-ridden last half hour prior to my weekly lessons. It was important for my parents that their children learned a musical instrument, and so I was given the flute, while my brother played the clarinet (bizarrely, because our grandmother had wanted someone to play Mozart’s clarinet concerto at her funeral).

Truth be told, I think my brother would have much rather learned the guitar, while I was very envious of his clarinet (he got around …

A Little-Known Truth About People-Pleasing and How to Stop (for Good)

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“Being a people-pleaser may be more than a personality trait; it could be a response to serious trauma.” ~Alex Bachert

Growing up in a home, school, and church that placed a lot of value on good behavior, self-discipline, and corporal punishment, I was a model child. There could have been an American Girl doll designed after me—the well-mannered church girl with a nineties hairbow edition.

I was quiet and pleasant and never got sent to the principal’s office. Complaining and “ugly” emotions were simply not allowed. Though I was very rambunctious and “rebellious” as a toddler, all of that was …

How to Move Through Your Fear by Retraining Your Brain

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When you’re in fight-or-flight mode, everything you do or don’t do teaches the brain something about the perceived threat. When you avoid or flee the situation, your brain experiences a wave of relief. The amygdala learns that avoiding that situation is how you stay safe from that threat.

This is exactly how you want the brain to respond if the threat is a grizzly bear. But what if the perceived threat is something less biologically adaptive, like a worry about being judged or teased?

Let’s say you’re invited to a party full of new people, and you have thoughts of …

Coming out of Survival Mode: How I Healed and Found Peace

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“I have come to believe that caring for myself is not self-indulgent. Caring for myself is an act of survival.” ~Audre Lorde

I can’t pinpoint the exact moment when I realized that I no longer needed to fight for my survival, but I do know that it came after several years of prayer, healing, and intensive work. It wasn’t an event, but rather the feeling of peace and calm that comes after a storm.

For me, the storm dissipated slowly. It was the kind of storm that kept swirling and re-emerging until I finally realized that it would take concentrated …

Why I Didn’t Love Myself (and All the Suggestions That Didn’t Help)

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“Remember, you have been criticizing yourself for years and it hasn’t worked. Try approving yourself and see what happens.” ~Louise Hay

There is a lot of hype around self-love these days. The media and marketing world often bombard us with messages insinuating that the key to self-love lies in consumerism. For a long time, I bought into this idea.

I would see an advertisement urging me to treat myself to a high-end face cream for a dose of self-care. Or a promotional email landing in my inbox might suggest that a calming lavender bubble bath was just what I needed …

How to Clear the Emotional Clutter That Weighs You Down

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“Declutter your mind, your heart, your home. Let go of the heaviness that is weighing you down.” ~Maria Defillo

I remember perusing through a used bookstore in a small New England town as a teenager. A book caught my eye—maybe because its spine was a MacIntosh apple red—and I slid it off the shelf. It was titled Clear Your Clutter with Feng Shui by Karen Kingston.

Back at home in my apartment in Boston, I devoured it. That book shifted the trajectory of my life. Fast-forward seventeen years later and living clutter-free is not only my lifestyle, it’s my calling …

When the People We Love Shut Us Out: What I Now Understand

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“Have patience that is all unresolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves, like closed rooms, like books written like a foreign language.” ~Rainer Maria Rilke

I started thinking about a distant relative on a walk in the woods. I had thought about her more often when she suddenly stopped speaking to our family, well over a decade ago. I would reach out to her through email, but after not hearing back over the years, I thought about her less and less and eventually stopped trying to connect with her.

On this particular walk, I began to

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