To Love Someone Is to Attend a Thousand Funerals
Change Made Easy: How to Get Unstuck by Doing What You’re Already Doing
“Don’t wait for your feelings to change to take action. Take action and your feelings will change.” ~Barbara Baron
You are stuck because you are waiting to want to do the things you know you need to do to get better. You aren’t doing the things you know you need to do because you don’t want to feel bad, but you already feel bad. You are already doing what you don’t want to do. Why not choose to do something that you don’t want to do that will actually move you forward?
If you are waiting to want to do …
How Sensitive People Can Stop Taking Things So Personally in Their Relationships
“The truth is that the way other people see us isn’t about us—it’s about them and their own struggles, insecurities, and limitations. You don’t have to allow their judgment to become your truth.” ~Daniell Koepke
As a child growing up with a highly sensitive mom, I often noticed her go quiet at the dinner table after my stepfather would make some little comment. Looking back, I know he was just tired and a bit grouchy from a long day at work, but my mom felt hurt by his words.
Over the years, the comments didn’t lessen, but I noticed …
The Art of Nurturing Self-Talk: How to Tell Yourself What You Need to Hear
“You will never speak to anyone more than you speak to yourself in your head. Be kind to yourself.” ~Unknown
Talking to ourselves in a nurturing way can be a challenge if we rarely heard nurturing words in the early formative years of our lives. In fact, if we were often criticized or neglected, we probably learned to criticize and neglect ourselves instead.
When I was growing up, my mom was a dedicated wife and mother, but she suffered from deep depression, anxiety, and low self-esteem. She didn’t know how to be encouraging or nurturing because she was never …
Unbecoming the Old Me: How I’m Finally Discovering That Life Can Be Fun
“The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results.” ~Albert Einstein
I woke up one morning and realized that I had no idea who I was. I realized that over the past thirty-something years I had been everyone but myself.
I was like a chameleon molding into the people that surrounded me. Not wanting to make noise or cause disturbance to others or trigger my own inner wounds.
My goal was being whoever I thought the person around me wanted me to be. To be accepted, loved, and liked by others. I realize …
9 Things I Would Tell My Younger Self to Help Her Change Her Life
“You are one decision away from a completely different life.” ~Mel Robbins
At twenty-six years old, I lost my dad to suicide. I was heartbroken and so angry.
My dad was not the best. Ever since I was little, he would criticize everything I did. I was never good enough for him, and I was a place he discharged his anger through emotional insults.
It never stopped, and I was always on high alert around him. Right until the moment he took his life.
He could also be loving, kind, funny, and warm, but my nervous system could never …
If You’re Feeling Judged: One Thing You Need to Understand
“Peace cannot be kept by force; it can only be achieved by understanding.” ~Albert Einstein
Most of us feel judged at times. We might feel judged for the way we look, the things we do (or don’t do), the things we say (and the way we say them), or for the things we believe.
We might respond to feeling judged by retreating inside ourselves, hiding, and silencing our voice, or we might react in defense or retaliation as if we’re being attacked.
It doesn’t feel good to feel judged. It can hurt, make us feel like we’re not good enough, …
A More Colorful Approach to Meditation—Creating Your Way to Peace
Have you ever felt so absorbed in the moment that you lost track of all your worries?
For me, it’s often something creative that gets me into a peaceful state of flow—writing, painting, or scrapbooking, for example.
Creativity is often the gateway to inner calm, assuming you’re able to focus on the process instead of striving for perfection and judging your work. If you combine creativity with mindfulness and meditation, you can bypass the inner critic and tap into the magic of pure presence.
That’s the idea behind Master Peace Box: a monthly art subscription box that pairs with …
How I Stopped Feeling Embarrassed and Ashamed of Being Single
“Be proud of who you are, not ashamed of how someone else sees you.” ~Unknown
“When was your last relationship?” my hairdresser asked as she twisted the curling wand into my freshly blow-dried hair.
“Erm, around two years ago.” I lied.
“Why did you break up?” she asked.
“Oh, he had a lot of issues. It wasn’t really working out.” I lied again.
I had gotten quite good at this, lying to hide my shame over being in my early thirties and never having been in a serious relationship. I had learned to think on my feet; that way, no …
All the Things I Didn’t Tell the Men I Dated Because I Was Afraid
I’ve recently been reflecting on my relationship history and how often I did things I wasn’t comfortable with instead of speaking up.
It would be easy to solely blame the men I’ve been with, but I’ve recognized I played a role by remaining silent instead of communicating my wants and needs and telling them when they were pushing my limits.
I have played a role in my own disrespect by swallowing my truth and showing a smile when I really felt uncomfortable.
I realize that everyone’s experiences are different, but if you can relate to what I wrote, perhaps you …
How to Show Up When Nothing About Your Life Is Perfect
“I saw that you were perfect, and so I loved you. Then I saw that you were not perfect, and I loved you even more.” ~Angelita Lim
I’m not a perfect parent. I’m not a perfect partner. I’m not in perfect health. I’m not a perfect friend. And I’m far from perfect with my finances.
Hell, nothing about my life is perfect. And guess what? I’ll never be able to attain perfection in those areas. And I’m sorry to say it, but neither will you.
Don’t be fooled by calling yourself a perfectionist. Perfection as a destination is what causes …
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