Posts tagged with “happy”
What to Do After a Breakup: A Brief Guide for the Newly Single
“Even in the loneliest moments I have been there for myself.” ~Sanober Khan
Last year, I decided to leave my boyfriend, who I had a loving and wonderful relationship with. I left for logistical reasons. I didn’t like the city I lived in or my job. But my boyfriend was happy there, so he stayed and I left.
The world doesn’t prepare you for a broken heart. There aren’t benefits you can apply for when the person who’s been beside you for years one day isn’t. The reality is that unless you’re married, people understand your feelings for a …
The 4 Happiness Archetypes and How to Get Out of the Rat Race
“When you dance, your purpose is not to get to a certain place on the floor. It’s to enjoy each step along the way.” ~Wayne Dyer
One day, I was complaining about not having enough days off to escape work and treat myself to a vacation. I was feeling stressed and tired. I can recall my stepfather looking into my eyes with a deep sense of peace and compassion.
“I hear you,” he said. “I know you work hard. Sometimes, I imagine myself jumping out of bed and going for a walk, whenever I want to.”
His words came …
Three Unexpected, Life-Changing Lessons I Learned at a Silent Retreat
“Every moment is a choice to begin again.” ~Unknown
By day three of the five-day silent retreat I found myself wondering, “Why did I do this again?”
The pain of sitting in lotus position for eight hours a day was testing my patience. I was frustrated that my mind would only be still for a few moments, before interrupting itself with commentary on the fact that my mind was still, and I wasn’t feeling any spiritual awakening—although not being a particularly “spiritual” person, this wasn’t entirely surprising
So why had I decided to go on a silent retreat in the …
Break the Cycle: How to Stop Hurting Others When You Were Mistreated
“What’s broken can be mended. What hurts can be healed. And no matter how dark it gets, the sun is going to rise again.” ~Unknown
I grew up with difficult and hurtful parents who spoke critically, with the intent to demean.
Each word of sarcasm, each thinly veiled joke or put-down undercut my self-esteem. Each knocked me down a rung in life and kept me from my potential.
Rampant comparisons to other Indian kids succeeding academically, attacks of my mediocre performance at school, and harsh language were my mother’s weapons of choice.
When someone attacks your self-esteem repeatedly, you …
How to Maintain a Sense of Peace No Matter What Life Throws At You
“Ships don’t sink because of the water around them; ships sink because of the water that gets in them. Don’t let what’s happening around you get inside you and weigh you down.” ~Unknown
Do you ever feel like your life is a rollercoaster?
One second, you’re on top of the world. The next, you’re down in the dumps.
For me, this feeling of going up and down began back in high school.
Before then, everything in life seemed like a test run. Sure, there were exams, extracurricular activities, and the usual social pressures. But now that university was only a …
3 Steps to Rocket Your Creative Dreams into the Stratosphere
“Do your art every day, no matter how crappy your day is.” ~Ksenia Anske
I was definitely the weird kid. The boy who played with invisible friends out there on the playground during recess. I had what you might call “a rich inner life.”
I guess that’s expected when you’re in grade school. All cool. But as I got older the world began to get unkind. Like the day I realized the stories in my head weren’t really real. Or when that jock guy called me an “art fag” in front of everybody. Or when all the girls said I …
What to Do When Your Need to Please Is Ruining Your Life
“We are captives of our own identities, living in prisons of our own creation.” ~Theodore Bagwell
Have you ever thought you had to do what other people said or they wouldn’t love you?
Have you felt selfish for wanting to put your needs first, or guilty for setting limits with the people you care about?
Have you learned that even when you’ve complied with everyone’s wishes and whims they still weren’t happy, and you weren’t either?
Welcome to the deception of people-pleasing. Welcome to the story of my life.
There is no tragedy greater than being alive but …
Finding a New Path When You’re Attached to the Old and Scared of Failing
“All endings are just beginnings. We just don’t know it yet.” ~Mitch Albom
The difficulty of finding, let alone staying on a path was brought to mind recently when I got lost in a maze at a children’s amusement park. Seriously lost.
In the end I scrambled under the maze to get out. I didn’t like the feeling of hitting up against walls, turning and trying, and then finding another wall blocking my path. Mazes are designed to confuse, and together with the summer heat, I’d had enough.
As I came out from under the fence, someone jokingly called out …
Overcoming the Fear That Stands Between You and Your Dreams
“A few rare individuals refuse to have limited lives. They drive through tremendous amounts of pain—from rejections and failures to shorter moments of embarrassment and anxiety. Because they avoid nothing, they can pursue their highest aspirations. They seem more alive than the rest of us.” ~Phil Stutz and Barry Michels
If you were to see me in a social situation, you’d think that I’m confident.
And in most informal social settings, I am. Now.
I love people, love hearing their stories, so most of the time I trust my ability to relate and connect.
But this wasn’t always the …
Love Hurts: Buddhist Advice for the Heartbroken – Interview and Book Giveaway
Note – The winners for this giveaway have been chosen. They are:
- Jennifer Moore Hardesty
- Margie Lynn
- Dr. Mac
- Ryan
- RB
- Justme
- Rogério Cardoso
- Fernanda Garza
- Benjamin E. Nichols
- Terri Cross
When you’re dealing with heartbreak, it can feel like the pain will never go away.
You may know, intellectually, that everything heals with time, but in that moment, when you’re suffering, it’s hard to hold onto hope.
Like all humans, I’ve experienced my fair share of loss, and I’ve felt scared, depressed, alone, betrayed, rejected, regretful, and angry—with other people, with myself, and with the world.
Losing someone or …
How We Suffer When We Judge Other People’s Choices
“The greatest gift you can give to others is the gift of unconditional love and acceptance.” ~Brian Tracy
Two months ago I travelled back home to Connecticut to care for a sick parent. My dad was preparing for cancer treatment, trying to figure out the medical system, and packing up to move all at the same time. He was overwhelmed with stress and exhausted from his pain medication. As a caring and health-conscious daughter, I was eager to help.
I had visions of cooking him meals of steamed greens and healthy soups. And I stocked my suitcase with supplements that …
Forgiveness Isn’t Weakness – Don’t Let Anger Hold You Back and Weigh You Down
“The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is an attribute of the strong.” ~Gandhi
For many years forgiveness was not in my mind, let alone my vocabulary. I was taught to believe that forgiveness was a sign of weakness, and I certainly did not forgive anyone who hurt me.
In the past, I have engaged in acts of revenge, which I thought was the right thing to do at those times. I was wrong.
One event that springs to my mind was when I was the target of a cruel prank. A group of guys had taunted a young man …
5 Things to Remember When You Feel Disgusted by How You Look
“Your face will change. Your body will change. The only kind of beauty that endures is the kind that lives in your heart.” ~Lori Deschene
How many times have you hidden away from the world when you felt ashamed by your appearance?
How many invitations have you turned down because you felt disgusted by the way you look?
And how many times have you gazed into the bathroom mirror and thought, “Why, in my brief existence on this planet, does it have to be me?”
Seeing your reflection in the mirror is like a physical pain. It’s not just one …
Having Doubts Doesn’t Mean Your Relationship Is Doomed
“When we can talk about our feelings, they become less overwhelming, less upsetting, and less scary.” ~Fred Rogers
There aren’t many clichés I resent more than this old chestnut about finding true love: “When you know, you know.”
As a late bloomer and skeptic who took her sweet time to get into a relationship, after decades of singleness and observation, nothing made me feel more like an outsider than the idea that love is an unexplainable phenomenon reserved for people who “know.”
In my early years of singledom, I believed I “knew” things. I had unwavering faith in a …
How Losing My Father Helped Me Become A Happier (and Better) Person
“In every loss there is a gain, as in every gain there is a loss, and with each ending comes a new beginning.” ~Buddhist Proverb
Four years ago, on a typically cold and overcast day in upstate NY, I found myself scurrying around preparing for a two-week trip to Kenya and Tanzania, which left the next day.
My father, a strong and soft-spoken sixty-two year old, had aspired to experience the great plains and animals of east Africa since childhood, and was deeply proud that he was able to pay for me to accompany him on his bucket-list adventure.
Though …
It Could Always Be Worse: The Power of Gratitude and Perspective
“When you arise in the morning, think of what a precious privilege it is to be alive—to breathe, to think, to enjoy, to love.” ~Marcus Aurelius
So, yesterday wasn’t the best day. I backed up into my husband’s car in the dark, on my way to a meeting. I didn’t see it in the mirrors. It was dark. (Did I mention that?) Well, it left a healthy size dent in the front, and needless to say, the tension began.
I felt bad. I honestly didn’t see it. Whenever I put my car into reverse, the mirrors automatically adjust and seem …
7 Simple Ways to Give Back to the World When You Have Little Time or Money
“I’ve learned that you shouldn’t go through life with a catchers mitt on both hands. You need to be able to throw something back.” ~Maya Angelou
Being charitable is often seen as a zero sum game, giving away our time or money for the benefit of others. As uplifting as it may be to give to a cause you care about, most of us feel we lack the authority to truly make things happen.
I discovered the transformative power of helping others when I was eight years old. My friends and I had imaginations like other children, but in the …
Being Happy Doesn’t Mean That Everything Is Perfect
“Being happy doesn’t mean that everything is perfect. It means you’ve decided to look beyond the imperfections.” ~Unknown
We are all on a mission to be the best we can be, to be happy, to have the perfect house, family, partner, and job. To complete our to-do list, to complete out bucket list, to make our parents proud, to get promoted, earn more money, and be successful.
Life can often feel like a never-ending treadmill, going quickly in the wrong direction. As we run faster to try to progress down this path, the goal becomes more elusive.
Are we …
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