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Posts tagged with “happy”

5 Ways Failure Can Be a Blessing in Disguise

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“Remember that sometimes not getting what you want is a wonderful stroke of luck.” ~ Dalai Lama

Recently I received some “bad” news: After years of studying and a nerve-wracking exams procedure, I didn’t make it to the list of the lucky few selected for the upper level public administration job posts.

Having always tried to keep up with a job that made good use of my law degree, while at the same time pursuing my career as a writer, there were times when I questioned whether a law-related job was actually my true calling.

At the time, trying for …

How to Boost Your Self-Worth: 7 Tips to Feel Better About Yourself

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“The more we see ourselves as a vibrant, successful, inspiring person who boldly declares and manifests her vision, the more we become just that.” ~Kristi Bowman

I was kind of a chunky kid growing up.

In my own little world of trolls and playwriting, I didn’t notice the chunk. I genuinely liked me. But when I entered the “real world” of opinions, people, and comparison, I began to realize or rather feel that perhaps my body wasn’t good enough.

This thought was like a seed that was then planted in my brain. And every time I thought about it, …

The Power of Staying Put When You Feel Like Running Away

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“You cannot keep running away from your fears. At some point in life you will have to build up the courage to face and overcome them.” ~Unknown

Last year my family and I relocated overseas from Australia to Singapore, which meant new jobs, new schools, new relationships—an entirely new way of living.

My husband was busy with his work, and I had two wide-eyed children looking up at mummy for direction. A part of me was excited for the challenge, but another part of me, of equal measure, was feeling overwhelmed by the prospect and struggling to let my feelings …

Our Power Lies In How We Choose to Respond to Our Pain

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“The strongest hearts have the most scars.” ~Unknown 

Maybe it’s true, that the strongest hearts have the most scars.

And maybe the pain and the discomfort we experience in life can serve as a great teacher, if we choose to see it that way.

Everyone has bumps, bruises, and pains in life, right?

Things happen that are outside our control, and it’s up to each one of us to decide how these experiences shape us.

There are those who endure incredible trauma and pain and choose to use those experiences to see life differently. They learn from it, grow, and …

5 Beliefs About Anxiety That Can Make You Even More Anxious

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“It’s okay to not be okay all the time.” ~Unknown

I never thought of myself as an anxious person.

But here I was again, staring at a computer screen in my office, so stressed I could barely type. I’d been throwing myself into work and I had crashed—hard.

And this wasn’t the first time.

Unfortunately, our mental image of who we think we are and who we actually are don’t always match up. But part of being human is that we learn to live with that, we embrace the struggle, and we grow.

Over the last five years I’ve had …

Life Is Not a Race: Why We’ll Never Find Happiness in the Future

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“Life is not a race but a pace we need to maintain with reality.” ~Amit Abraham

Almost all of my adult life I’ve competed in the extreme sport of white-water kayaking.

My life revolved around adrenalin and competition.

Recently, I had a dream I will never forget:

I was running in a race and I was out in front, winning.

I got to a point in the course where there were no signposts showing the next turn. So I asked the race officials, “Where is the course?”

They replied, “We don’t know.”

The race officials couldn’t tell me where the …

How to Use Silence to Help Your Hurting Friend

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“Sitting silently beside a friend who is hurting may be the best gift we can give.” ~Unknown

There’s a time for words and a time for silence. Thankfully, when I went through one of the darkest periods of my life, I had friends who knew what time it was.

When things go well, your friends don’t usually need to show up in silence. But everything changes when you go through a season of intense pain and disappointment. I know this from firsthand experience.

My life took a drastic turn for the worse when the first ride of the season on …

11 Life-Changing Lessons I Learned from My Mother After She Died

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“Those we love never truly leave us… There are things that death cannot touch.” ~J.K. Rowling

Growing up, I was glued to my mother’s hip, ready to follow her wherever the world took us.

I used to sleep at her feet on the floor of her law school lecture halls while hundreds of students poured over scores of legal terms and historical court cases.

When I was six, we packed our bags to jet off on her semester abroad in Paris, and at fourteen, I stood beside her as she battled stage III breast cancer.

After my stepfather passed away, …

Overcoming Self-Sabotage: How to Stop Attracting Pain

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“Life will bring you pain all by itself. Your responsibility is to create joy.” ~Milton Erickson

Sometimes, there comes a point in our lives when we need to let go of something painful, whether its guilt or a toxic relationship, but it’s equally difficult to let go and hard to live without. So we get uncomfortably stuck in the middle of two realities: where we are and where we want to be.

But do we really want to let go of the pain? Or is letting go so scary and unfamiliar that we’d rather hold onto it?

I’ve always …

Love Isn’t Enough (and Other Reasons I Ended My Toxic Relationship)

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“Some people think that it’s holding on that makes one strong; sometimes it’s letting go.” ~Unknown

Sometimes we prolong relationships for the sake of comfort and familiarity. We’re fearful of what’s out there, and life without a partner. No matter how many times we’ve been hurt, taken for granted, or had our needs neglected, we still choose to stay even if our mind and heart strongly suggest otherwise.

I thought I was strong for putting up with my ex’s mistreatment. I had held the ability to forgive in high regard, and I wanted to keep that standard.

I’m not exaggerating …

How to Stop Waiting for the Other Shoe to Drop and Start Living Fully

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“Use your precious moments to live life fully every single second of every single day.” ~Marcia Wieder

I recently came back from an amazing vacation overseas with my family. All of our travel went smoothly, everyone stayed healthy, and there wasn’t any drama or conflict among family members. Other than one flight being delayed, it was perfect.

On the way home from the trip my heart and soul were soaring from the fun we had enjoyed, savoring the memories in my mind and feeling grateful. I noticed, though, that when I returned home my mind slowly started to shift. …

Take the Leap: Reinvent Yourself and Be Who You Want to Be

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“The only thing that punk rock should ever really mean is not sitting around and waiting for the lights to go green.” ~Frank Turner

I was exactly where I should have been on the afternoon I jumped. I was four years post-undergrad at an elite private college, halfway through a Masters Degree from the nation’s top Social Work program, about to begin an internship, and working three public service jobs simultaneously. My boyfriend had just moved into my apartment, and the feeling of being “settled” was just starting to sink in.

The remaining challenge of adulthood, it seemed, …

Love Is When You Feel Happy Doing Nothing Together

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What to Do After a Breakup: A Brief Guide for the Newly Single

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“Even in the loneliest moments I have been there for myself.” ~Sanober Khan

Last year, I decided to leave my boyfriend, who I had a loving and wonderful relationship with. I left for logistical reasons. I didn’t like the city I lived in or my job. But my boyfriend was happy there, so he stayed and I left.

The world doesn’t prepare you for a broken heart. There aren’t benefits you can apply for when the person who’s been beside you for years one day isn’t. The reality is that unless you’re married, people understand your feelings for a …

Two Principles for a Happy Life

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The 4 Happiness Archetypes and How to Get Out of the Rat Race

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“When you dance, your purpose is not to get to a certain place on the floor. It’s to enjoy each step along the way.” ~Wayne Dyer

One day, I was complaining about not having enough days off to escape work and treat myself to a vacation. I was feeling stressed and tired. I can recall my stepfather looking into my eyes with a deep sense of peace and compassion.

“I hear you,” he said. “I know you work hard. Sometimes, I imagine myself jumping out of bed and going for a walk, whenever I want to.”

His words came …

Three Unexpected, Life-Changing Lessons I Learned at a Silent Retreat

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“Every moment is a choice to begin again.” ~Unknown

By day three of the five-day silent retreat I found myself wondering, “Why did I do this again?”

The pain of sitting in lotus position for eight hours a day was testing my patience. I was frustrated that my mind would only be still for a few moments, before interrupting itself with commentary on the fact that my mind was still, and I wasn’t feeling any spiritual awakening—although not being a particularly “spiritual” person, this wasn’t entirely surprising

So why had I decided to go on a silent retreat in the …

Break the Cycle: How to Stop Hurting Others When You Were Mistreated

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“What’s broken can be mended. What hurts can be healed. And no matter how dark it gets, the sun is going to rise again.” ~Unknown

I grew up with difficult and hurtful parents who spoke critically, with the intent to demean.

Each word of sarcasm, each thinly veiled joke or put-down undercut my self-esteem. Each knocked me down a rung in life and kept me from my potential.

Rampant comparisons to other Indian kids succeeding academically, attacks of my mediocre performance at school, and harsh language were my mother’s weapons of choice.

When someone attacks your self-esteem repeatedly, you …

How to Maintain a Sense of Peace No Matter What Life Throws At You

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“Ships don’t sink because of the water around them; ships sink because of the water that gets in them. Don’t let what’s happening around you get inside you and weigh you down.” ~Unknown

Do you ever feel like your life is a rollercoaster?

One second, you’re on top of the world. The next, you’re down in the dumps.

For me, this feeling of going up and down began back in high school.

Before then, everything in life seemed like a test run. Sure, there were exams, extracurricular activities, and the usual social pressures. But now that university was only a …

3 Steps to Rocket Your Creative Dreams into the Stratosphere

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“Do your art every day, no matter how crappy your day is.” ~Ksenia Anske

I was definitely the weird kid. The boy who played with invisible friends out there on the playground during recess. I had what you might call “a rich inner life.”

I guess that’s expected when you’re in grade school. All cool. But as I got older the world began to get unkind. Like the day I realized the stories in my head weren’t really real. Or when that jock guy called me an “art fag” in front of everybody. Or when all the girls said I …