Menu

I just randomly and suddenly fell out of love

Home→Forums→Relationships→I just randomly and suddenly fell out of love

New Reply
Viewing 7 posts - 1,441 through 1,447 (of 1,447 total)
1 2 3 … 95 96 97
  • Author
    Posts
  • May 28, 2026 at 5:49 pm #458219
    Confused
    Participant

    Thank you anita

    Hmm yeah you are right, we said that again and yes, this was the first one to move me like that.. but u know i can’t even remember that right now, everything is so long ago or my brain has just disconnected me 🙁

    Today i feel very bad, so disconnected from everything and everyone, i can’t enjoy anything, can’t focus on anything, feel empty and alone in my house and idk what’s the problem. All i know is i can’t stop thinking of her, from the minute i wake up. I constantly look in the past and try to find what changed or reminisce about how good i used to feel. I know that’s a compulsion/rumination but its hard to stop.
    Hours ago i was thinking about her and i was like “what? who is this girl even? why am i so obsessed with her?” not like i don’t “know” who she is, but it’s something different i can’t explain it.

    May 28, 2026 at 6:51 pm #458220
    anita
    Participant

    You are welcome, Dear Confused:

    It’s understandable to miss feeling good, and to remember it better than it was, forgetting the times when it did not feel that great- a sort of selective emotional memory.

    Actually, quite often since December you felt pretty good from time, having lots of fun talking with her (and forgetting those times?)

    Yet, no doubt a whole lot of the time (since Dec), you feel disconnected and flat. The THINKING feeds the flatness.

    We talked about CBT which is based on the principle that changing thinking = changing feelings.

    We talked about psychiatric drugs that block obsessive thinking, leading to feeling better.

    You mentioned a recent therapist: does she do CBT? Did you discuss psych drugs with her?

    Or any other strategy?

    🤔 Anita

    May 28, 2026 at 7:38 pm #458222
    Confused
    Participant

    No no, it is the opposite, i can’t how that felt, my mind “removed” it, like a distant cognitive memory, no emotional charge, that goes for my whole life pretty much 🙁

    Yes some days have been fun but i constantly ask from myself to be enthusiastic, miss her, be crazy about her, etc, otherwise it’s hard to feel it.

    I know it does but i can’t really stop it, no matter what i do, play games, watch movies, be out with friends, ride the motorcycle , nothing works. All i do is think and ruminate and when i don’t i feel bad for not doing it lol.

    Yes we did talk about those two, what do u mean changing thinking=changing feelings? About drugs, i am still not comfortable idk, maybe Wellbutrin but i need to find someone to prescribe that for me..

    Yes, the therapist suggested CBT-ERP mostly, she constantly says i should really master CBT and slowly eliminate compulsions but she knows it’s difficult.

    May 28, 2026 at 7:45 pm #458223
    Confused
    Participant

    Oh anita, why would i not feel absolute joy and contentment having such an amazing girl loving me and being so caring to me.She’s such a sweetheart and i wanted nothing else than to kiss her all over her pretty face before this happened 🙁

    Actually in december too, while holding her i would hug her so tight and kiss her hands, forehead, lips, eyes, etc and i would feel like shouting from excitement! (while my mind was telling me “u are fooling her, u will leave her” “u are faking it”)
    Now it’s like none of this matters, i can’t imagine anything romantic or feel it, like this self of mine has gone dark.. only void and vanity remains.

    May 28, 2026 at 7:51 pm #458224
    anita
    Participant

    Hey 🌙🦉 Confused:

    By changing thinking => changing feelings, I mean something like (taken from your post only 4 minutes ago):

    Thought: I must “be crazy about her” (feeling inadequate for… not feeling crazy)=> Thought: I need not be crazy about anyone. I don’t owe anyone Crazy 🐔” ( feeling adequate for NOT feeling crazy)

    I think that what it comes down (or up) to is about Confused giving Confused the break he needs and deserves, and no longer giving Confused a difficult time!

    Love Confused first!

    ✨️🌿✨️ Anita

    May 28, 2026 at 8:16 pm #458227
    Confused
    Participant

    Oh i see what u mean. I think i mostly want to feel it for myself first, because i think that’s how i will feel good and okay.

    But for how long? I dont enjoy anything, i want the 2025 back 🙁

    May 28, 2026 at 8:40 pm #458231
    anita
    Participant

    Double posting! As to your post before last:

    I so relate to feeling something authentically and then doubting that it’s real (“u’re faking it”)

    It’s a normal confusion that happens as a result of early trauma ( or a result of taking a mood altering drug, I imagine)

    As to your most recent post: I think that the sooner you put yourself first ( I don’t mean selfishly, but in a way that’s healthy), the sooner 2026 will get better and better.

    Does this make sense to you, really putting yourself first, like you matter most- in your own life? 🌿 # 1?

    🐶 Anita

  • Author
    Posts
Viewing 7 posts - 1,441 through 1,447 (of 1,447 total)
1 2 3 … 95 96 97

You must be logged in to reply to this topic. Please log in OR register.