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Search Results for "uncertainty" — 367 posts

What Would Your Future Look Like If You Took a Leap of Faith?

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“In the end, we only regret the chances we didn’t take, relationships we were afraid to have, and the decisions we waited too long to make. ” ~Unknown

Have you ever thought about making a big change in your life?

Chances are, just that very idea produces a mild sense of anxiety and discomfort. But what if you were to actually go ahead and make that change? What would that look like, what would that feel like?

A rhetorical question, I realize. You only know if you go through with it. If you don’t, you will never know. It’s a …

The Gift Of Unsoothable Pain: Darkness Can Lead to Light

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“Blessed are the cracked for they shall let in the light.” ~Groucho Marx

In 2008, after ten years of marriage, my former husband and I decided to divorce.

It came as a shock to those who knew us. We were living what most would consider the American dream: two healthy children, beautiful home, great friends, strong careers, two incomes—the works.

Though my ex-husband and I got along well, the marriage was missing an intimate, heartfelt connection.

Loneliness and longing grew with each passing year until I could no longer ignore them. I knew the kind of intimacy for which I …

7 Lessons to Learn If You Want to Thrive in Life

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“Embrace each challenge in your life as an opportunity for self-transformation.” ~Bernie S. Siegel

I’d been having mild pain for about a week—a consistent, dull ache in the center of my chest.

I’m thirty-nine years old with no personal history of heart disease, or of anything else for that matter. Worry hadn’t yet consumed me, but I was keeping an eye on the pain to see if it got better or worse.

Once a week I drive ninety Los Angeles miles round trip for work. I say “Los Angeles” miles because I should theoretically be able to make the journey …

The Most Common Cause for Overeating and How to Overcome It

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“When we run from our feelings, they follow us. Everywhere.” ~Martha Beck, Ph.D

I’ve tried Paleo, The 4-Hour Body, even Body for Life.

I’ve tried intermittent fasting. (That was no fun.)

I’ve tried low-carb, carb-cycling, and carb-binging. (While I don’t think that’s a diet strategy, it was what I experienced.)

Sure, I lost weight temporarily, but I never felt like I “arrived.” I never felt…good.

Ironically, it took me gaining weight to learn the secret.

How Will I Know When I’ve “Arrived”?

Is there an image inside your head of what you “should” look like?

I …

Why We Get Attached to Our Struggles and Who We Could Be Without Them

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“Stop seeking out the storms and enjoy more fully the sunlight.” ~Gordon B. Hinckley

I have been interested in personal development for as long as I can remember.

I devour books about increasing confidence, happiness, self-worth, and intuition. I‘m inspired by articles about self-care, living intentionally, and aligning with your purpose in life. I have read many fabulous books over the last decade, all with their own nuggets of wisdom and insight.

Recently, I was reading the book, Supercoach, 10 Secrets to Transform Anyone’s Life by Michael Neill. In his book, Michael describes how many of his clients go through …

Keeping Your Word and Showing Up in Your Relationships

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“The simplest deed is better than the greatest intention.” ~John Burroughs

In former times, a person’s word was his “bond.”

In fact, major business deals were transacted and solidified with a simple promise and a firm handshake. It was that basic.

Court cases were reserved for hardened criminals, not contractual breaches. And trust? It was as much of a commodity as stocks and bonds.

I miss those days.

Based upon a number of personal and professional interactions over the last couple of years, it seems that not enough folks consider their word as binding, particularly when it comes to friends …

Changing Your Trajectory to Live a Life of Purpose

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“It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are.” ~E.E. Cummings

For a long time, I felt disconnected from my life. I’d spent most of it on autopilot, either regretting the past or dreaming about the future.

I regretted being too afraid to read an essay at the monthly open mic near me for all those years. I thought a lot about writing without actually writing.

I dreamed about a future me, totally transformed with much better hair, eagerly writing at a sunny cafe, the words flowing through my fingers easily, flawlessly.

My approach to finding purpose …

How to Stop Overthinking and Start Living: 10 Helpful Tips

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“Thinking has, many a time, made me sad, darling; but doing never did in all my life….My precept is, do something, my sister, do good if you can; but at any rate, do something.” ~Elizabeth Gaskell

Problems. We all face them.

Some are frivolous; some are life changing. Some force us to draw from within us our greatest mental potential. Many cause nothing more than stress.

Whatever issues life presents us, whether small or big, we think about them.

We think about what to do, what not to do, and what would be “best” for us and for everyone around …

How to Stop Being a Doormat and Start Speaking Up

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“Speak your mind even if your voice shakes.” ~Maggie Kuhn

For years I was that person who needed to know what would happen in the near future. I wasn’t content with being in the moment and letting things unfold naturally because it made me anxious.

Knowing, or at least thinking I knew, was a way for me to relax and reassure myself that nothing was going to unexpectedly pop up. The idea of a problem spontaneously arising made me so nervous and anxious that I’d become a doormat instead of speaking up and saying what I really thought.

For me, …

Why We Should Stop Trying

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“If only we’d stop trying to be happy, we could have a pretty good time.” ~Edith Wharton

Several years ago a well-known Zen Master accepted me as a long distance student. In one of our first email exchanges I wrote, “Dear Teacher, I am trying to sit every day for thirty minutes and in my practice I am trying to follow my breath.”

“Please,” he wrote back, “stop trying. You are your breath.”

I remember reading his words and feeling perplexed, confused, almost annoyed. What in the world did he mean? Wasn’t it obvious that we had no choice but …

5 Things to Remember When You Start Worrying

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“Do not anticipate trouble, or worry about what may never happen. Keep in the sunlight.” ~Benjamin Franklin

Have you every worried yourself to the point of emotional, even physical exhaustion?

Do you often feel stuck, anxious, or mistrustful of the world around you?

I know what it’s like to feel trapped by worry—in fact, I have always been a chronic worrier.

I worried and obsessed mostly about the hypothetical, the imaginary, the infinite variety of “what-if” scenarios. Eventually, I convinced myself that if I worried about every conceivable thing that could go wrong in my life, I would either …

How To Calm Your Worries by Admitting What You Don’t Know

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“Most things I worry about never happen anyway.” ~Tom Petty

There was once a wise farmer who had tended his farm for many years. One day his horse unexpectedly ran away into the mountains. Upon hearing the news, the farmer’s neighbors came to visit. 

“How terrible,” they told him.

“We’ll see,” the wise farmer replied.

The next morning, to the farmer’s surprise, the horse returned, bringing with it three wild horses.

“How wonderful. You are very lucky,” the neighbors exclaimed.

“We’ll see,” replied the farmer.

The following day, the farmer’s son tried to ride one of the wild horses. The …

Connecting with Your Peaceful Self to Overcome Fears and Worries

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“Fear: False Evidence Appearing Real.” ~Unknown

It was an ordinary school morning in a busy European city. I seem to recall it was spring, as my memories store the feeling of awakening after a long winter.

I was seventeen and getting ready to go to school. Following my standard morning routine, which included eating my meticulously assembled breakfast, I walked to the tram station.

The city I lived in at the time was situated in a beautiful valley, and the tram ride offered a trip to the hub of the city. My high school was downtown in the historical part …

Moving On Isn’t Failure: 5 Lessons On Changing Paths

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“Letting go isn’t the end of the world. It’s the beginning of a new life.” ~Unknown

Ever since I was young, I have been intensely driven and very goal-focused. I have never been the type to flip-flop and I have never been the type to start something I do not intend to finish.

Recently, I was faced with the incredibly difficult decision to leave the career path I had committed myself to. In the process, I learned quite a lot about my definition of “failure” and what happens when we allow ourselves to move on.

About three months after …

You Are Not Your Thoughts and Feelings, and They Don’t Have to Bring You Down

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“Give me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. ” ~Reinhold Niebuhr

Think about the future! Don’t do something you’ll regret! You need to plan for tomorrow! I wish I hadn’t done that! Will things ever work out? Why did they do that? Will I ever find happiness? Why has life made me the way I am? What’s wrong with me?

Around and around it went inside my mind, a never-ending internal conversation full of questions and uncertainties—the not knowing driving me insane …

7 Ways to Live a Less Fearful, More Peaceful Life

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“We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when adults are afraid of the light.” ~Adapted from Plato

I was digging in my half-empty refrigerator one day, searching for leftovers, when my phone rang. I glared at it wondering who the hell had the nerve to interrupt my hunt for sustenance.

I grabbed the phone with pure agitation and put it to my ear. On the other end of the line I heard a faint voice mutter the three most unforgettable words I had ever heard: “Dad is gone.”

The …

Do You Think You Need to Be Perfect to Be Accepted?

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“What you resist, persists.” ~C.G. Jung

There it is: Perfection, Eureka!—the holy grail of achievement, like an elusive mirage in the middle of a desert or that pesky little pot of gold we are always hunting for at the end of the rainbow, purring with all of its possibilities, protection, and promise.

Yet, despite its charm and the value we tend to assign to the trait, as well as on those who possess it, perfectionism ultimately leads to the same destination. In striving for perfection, we may soon find ourselves disappointed, dissatisfied, and even sometimes, knee-deep in suffering and denial, …

Stop Striving for Happiness and Start Practicing It Now

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“Happiness is the absence of striving for happiness.” ~Chuang Tzu

It all started when one of my boys asked me if I was happy, and of course I answered yes.

Why wouldn’t I be happy? I have a handsome and kind husband, two boys of which I am very proud, I had a successful business, I had a house I loved, I was surrounded by friends, I was a sought after speaker in my community, and blah blah blah.

Then my son asked why I didn’t have fun anymore. I began defending my happiness to him, explaining all the reasons …

Finding Happiness on the Other Side of Fear

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“Most of us have two lives: the life we live, and the unlived life within us.” ~Steven Pressfield

We are so scared of the unknown. Anything that we haven’t yet experienced can lead to fear.

I will forever remember my first time skydiving. I was absolutely terrified. Are you sure this parachute is going to open up? “No ma’am, it’s not for sure. But it’s highly likely.” Great.

During pregnancy, I was scared nearly every day for nine months as I wondered, “How in the world is that going to come out of there?” Well, one thing was …

Walk Toward Your Dreams: If Not Now, When?

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“Do not wait until the conditions are perfect to begin. Beginning makes the conditions perfect.” ~Alan Cohen

Last year I was suddenly made redundant along with half of my colleagues, as our company was being taken over. It was swift and severe. It was also a blessing.

I didn’t want to work for the new company whose values conflicted with my own. And I had been wavering on making a decision about my career.

Now I was being forced to decide but I just wasn’t sure what I wanted to do. At least, that’s what I told myself. Fear makes …