Removing Someone from My Life Means I Respect Myself
Why We Often React in Ways We Regret (and How to Stop)
“By practicing self-awareness and pausing before reacting, we can help create a world with less pain and more love.” ~Lori Deschene
It happens to the best of us. We find ourselves in a challenging situation or stressful environment and we get overcome—by an emotion, an impulse—and we act in a way that makes things worse.
It might be exploding at our spouse in response to a simple request. Or freezing during a difficult meeting at work. For me, this often happens when I receive negative feedback or constructive criticism. Something “takes us over” and we act in a way that …
We All Make Mistakes, So Let’s Try to Remember the Good
Julius Caesar has long been my favorite work of William Shakespeare. I am drawn to the political intrigue, the betrayal, the powerful words of Marc Antony.
One line from the play has always remained lodged in my mind:
“The evil that men do lives after them; the good is oft interred with their bones.”
The line often pops into my head when I feel unjustly persecuted or blamed. Shakespeare understood hundreds of years ago that human nature causes us to feel self-centered and unjustly targeted.
While I recognize I am not now nor was I ever a perfect mother, I …
3 Tools to Help You Calm Your Mind and Let Go of Anxiety
“I vow to let go of all worries and anxiety in order to be light and free.” ~Thich Nhat Hanh
I’ve struggled with anxiety throughout my life. A difficult childhood and my highly sensitive personality meant I grew into an anxious kid—there was just too much pain and emotional overwhelm for my young brain to handle.
My anxiety most often manifested as perfectionism and people pleasing, so from the outside everything seemed great. I excelled in school and I was a good kid who did as she was told. But there was a war inside me.
I felt broken, …
Don’t Lose Sight of the Big Picture: Spend Time with People You Truly Enjoy
“Even if you are on the right track you’ll get run over if you just sit there.” ~Will Rogers
How is this happening again?
Lying in bed watching The Mentalist at 8 P.M. on a Saturday night, my mind begins to wander.
A year ago I was so happy. I spent almost every night hanging out with amazing friends and now I’m here, alone watching TV.
As my heart sank into my stomach, I shook my head, suppressed my feelings, and pushed play to start the next episode.
A few years earlier I moved to Santa Fe, NM, a state …
Self-Love Means Never Saying “You Complete Me”
“You can search throughout the entire universe for someone who is more deserving of your love and affection than you are yourself, and that person is not to be found anywhere. You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe deserve your love and affection.” ~Buddha
A popular topic in the glossy magazines, learning to “love yourself” always seemed to me to be a self-indulgent first-world pastime.
It seemed obvious that the commonly-repeated mantra “love yourself first” was just a sign of the times in a world where something like half of all marriages end in divorce. …
What Helped Me Move On After Being Cheated On
“Sometimes walking away is the only option because you finally respect yourself enough to know that you deserve better.” ~Unknown
When I was cheated on, I was hit by an ongoing blizzard of conflicting emotions.
There were the initial tears that I failed to hide from anyone. There was a cold ruthlessness as I told her that I couldn’t be with her after what she did. There was a wave of misery, there was a wave of anger, and all of it was dotted with periodic moments of calm and even gratitude that she was finally out of my life.…
20 Reminders That May Comfort You When You Feel Anxious
Your heart races. Your body temperature rises. Your hands may shake. Your stomach may churn.
Your thoughts start spiraling to the worst could that happen, and suddenly you feel so unequipped—like everything’s going to fall apart, and you won’t be able to handle it.
It can feel so powerless when anxiety takes over, almost like your brain and body are being hijacked, and there’s little you can do to feel safe or in control.
Except that’s not actually true. Though anxiety can have both physical and mental symptoms, and we can’t just will it away, there are things we …
4 Simple Techniques to Erase Subconscious Negativity
“As you sow in your subconscious mind, so shall you reap in your body and environment.” ~Joseph Murphy
The subconscious mind is like a computer’s hard drive.
It saves whatever information you feed it, without any bias. It does not discriminate between useful information and trash information. It just saves everything!
The subconscious mind learns through repetition. So if it’s fed the same information multiple times, it keeps overwriting it until the information gets etched in.
As you would have guessed, such information is harder to erase.
For example, let’s say you write “I am not good enough” on …
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