You’re Not a Failure, Keep Going
What No One Tells You About Setting Boundaries: The Good, Bad, and Ugly
“Yesterday I was clever, so I wanted to change the world. Today I am wise, so I am changing myself.” ~Rumi
Three years back was the first time I dared to set a boundary and be assertive in a friendship, and guess what? She blocked me on her phone, and we stopped being friends.
It came as a rude shock because I was quite invested in the friendship. Not only did we have good times together, but I had helped her search for and find a job and even babysat her kid for a long while free of charge. I …
How I’m Winning Over My Inner Critic by Letting It Exist
“Winning the war of words inside your soul means learning to defy your inner critic.” ~Steven Furtick
We all have that voice in our head, the voice that’s always negative about ourselves. Our inner voice. Our inner critic.
The one that tells us we’re not good enough, not smart enough, not attractive enough. That voice that continuously compares us to other people, so we come up lacking and feeling less than.
Sometimes that voice is our own. Other times, and for some people, maybe those of us who have felt unloved or disliked by a significant person in our …
What I Really Mean When I Say I’m Fine (Spoiler: I’m Not)
“Tears are words that need to be written.” ~Paulo Coelho
It was lovely to see you today. I haven’t seen you in such a long time. So much has happened since the last time we saw each other.
You asked me how I was. I politely replied, “I’m fine” and forced a smile that I hoped would be believable. It must have worked. You smiled back and said, “I’m so glad to hear that. You look great.”
But I’m not really fine. I haven’t been fine for a very long time, and I wonder if I will ever know what …
Let Go of Control: How to Learn the Art of Surrender
“You must learn to let go. Release the stress. You were never in control anyway.” ~Steve Maraboli
I’ve noticed that things go much more smoothly when I give up control—when I allow them to happen instead of making them happen. Unfortunately, I’m terrible at this.
Although I’m much better than I used to be, I’m a bit of a control freak. I often use perfectly good energy trying to plan, predict, and prevent things that I cannot possibly plan, predict, or prevent.
For example, I wonder if my baby is going to get a proper nap when we travel …
What It Really Means to Have a Supportive Partner
“The best possible thing you can get out of a relationship is that you’re with someone who encourages you to be the best version of yourself every day.” ~Nishan Panwar
Let me ask you a question. When was the last time you felt supported? When was the last time you felt safe, at home, encouraged, and able to be 100% yourself?
If your partner creates a safe space for you to do this, then you are truly blessed. If not, have you ever wondered why you don’t feel safe, supported, and loved?
Two years ago my best friend told …
3 Reasons to Stop Worrying About Your Negative Thoughts
“Whatever you fight, you strengthen, and what you resist, persists.” ~Eckhart Tolle
Do you ever catch yourself being critical, judgmental, or full of fear and worry? And do you ever worry about how many negative thoughts you have? If you do, this post is for you.
We’re taught that negative thoughts are bad, that they’re “toxic,” they “lower your vibration,” keep you stuck, and so on.
We’re taught that in order to feel self-assured and confident, we should banish negative thoughts from our lives. Kind of like, goodbye, negative thoughts; hello, higher vibration, better boyfriend, nicer car, inner peace, …
Why People Are Rude and Unkind (and Why It’s Not About You)
“How people treat other people is a direct reflection of how they feel about themselves.” ~Paulo Coelho
By nature, I am a happy, optimistic, idealistic person. I have always been one to look on the bright side and see the good in people. My usual philosophy in life is that the world is full of brightness, love, and possibilities to seize.
Recently, though, my philosophy began to fade in the face of a mild depression.
I began to cry a lot and retreat into myself rather than being social and opening up, which only furthered the problem. I felt …
45 Simple Self-Care Practices for a Healthy Mind, Body, and Soul
“There are days I drop words of comfort on myself like falling leaves and remember that it is enough to be taken care of by myself.” ~Brian Andreas
Do you ever forget to take care of yourself?
I know. You’re busy, and finding the time to take proper care of yourself can be hard. But if you don’t, it won’t be long before you’re battered from exhaustion and operating in a mental fog where it’s hard to care about anything or anyone.
I should know.
A few years ago, I had a corporate job in London, working a regular sixty-hour …
How I Stopped Putting Everyone Else’s Needs Above My Own
“Never feel sorry for choosing yourself.” ~Unknown
I was eleven years old, possibly twelve, the day I first discovered my mother’s betrayal. I assume she didn’t hear me when I walked in the door after school. The distant voices in the finished basement room of our home drew me in. My mother’s voice was soft as she spoke to her friend. What was she hiding that she didn’t want me to hear?
I leaned in a little bit closer to the opening of the stairs… She was talking about a man she’d met. Her voice changed when she spoke of …
The Only Way to Form Meaningful Relationships with People Who Get You
“A friend is someone who gives you total freedom to be yourself.” ~Jim Morrison
When I left my full-time position at an ad agency and ventured out on my own, I had a clear goal in mind—to connect with like-minded people who align with my highest good. As far as how I was going to do that, I had little clue.
My life was full of relationships built from forced, sometimes toxic circumstances where we found each other out of need or convenience. I am grateful for each of those people because they were there when I needed them most, …
How I Created Opportunities in a World Full of Obstacles
“I really want to, but I can’t because [add semi-valid reason here].”
That’s a template sentence to let yourself off the hook.
It’s not copyrighted, so feel free to use it any time you want to let go of your dreams and not feel bad about it.
Honestly, it hurts me every time I hear someone say it. I see it for what it is—an excuse.
Every single one of us has ambitions, hopes, dreams, and goals. We fantasize about them on our commutes to work and before we sleep. We talk about how we will one day achieve …
Recognizing Our Human Goodness May Be the Most Radical Act We Can Take
Most of us can be way too hard on ourselves, when life is already hard enough. We spend our days taking an inventory of all the ways we’re falling short, tell ourselves we’re not good enough, and even question our basic goodness, as if there’s something wrong with us at our core. I know I’ve done this countless times before.
When I respond harshly instead of pausing before reacting or make a mistake I keep making over and over again, it’s easy to conclude I am fundamentally bad or damaged, or else I would more consistently do better.
Then, waddling …
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