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Posts tagged with “appreciate”

Happiness Doesn’t Make Us Grateful; Gratitude Makes Us Happy

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“In daily life we must see that it is not happiness that makes us grateful, but gratefulness that makes us happy.” ~Brother David Steindl-Rast

A few years ago, my life was chaotic. I drank too much, slept too little, and always went with the flow. I didn’t look out for myself emotionally and physically. I burned the candle at both ends and eventually wore myself out.

I often felt depressed. After my parents’ divorce when I was 18, I lost the closeness I used to feel with my family. My entire focus was on what I didn’t have anymore.

I …

Love What’s Right Before You Instead of Hating What’s Missing

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“I have learned that to be with those I like is enough.” ~Walt Whitman

I take stuff for granted. I suspect you take stuff for granted.

It’s almost as if it can’t be helped. When things—family, friends, health, amenities, or money—occupy a place in our lives for years, we naturally begin to view them as commonplace; we assume they’ll forever be, just as they’ve always been.

Yet this mindset—this “Oh, of course that’s there; that’s always been there” perspective—often seems to prevent us from realizing how much it would mean to us if that something wasn’t there anymore.…

Learn to Appreciate Time and People

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The Greatest Lesson We Learn When Someone Is Unkind

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“I have learned silence from the talkative, toleration from the intolerant, and kindness from the unkind.” ~Khalil Gibran

I recently travelled to Malaysia for a friend’s wedding where I spent four delicious days communing with wild monkeys and feasting on sticky rice. The people were kind and warm, the culture rich, the trip magical.

On my last day in Kuala Lumpur, I was headed out to buy souvenirs for family and friends when I stumbled across the most beautiful temple—filled with ornate gold and red statues, air thick with sweet-smelling smoke.

I wandered around, overcome with majesty, trying to breathe …

Letting Go of Stubbornness: Appreciate Your Loved Ones While You Can

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“Before someone’s tomorrow has been taken away, cherish those you love, appreciate them today. “ ~Michelle C. Ustaszeski

My brother Greg and I were the closest of friends growing up, even if you weigh in the occasional tiff or disagreement we sometimes had.

We discovered our favorite toys together as kids, rode bikes side by side, and conquered video games as a two-man team. Even well into our teenage years, we were an inseparable pair, always looking out for one another.

The fact that our father died of a brain tumor when we were young had forged a deep understanding …

There’s a Gift in Every Problem: Finding the Good in the Bad

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“Every problem has a gift for you in its hands.” ~Richard Bach

I bought the magazine because it had pizza on the cover and the headline read: “Yes, you can eat pizza.”

At that point, the idea that I could eat pizza was as absurd to me as the thought of finding a tiny dinosaur living in my flowerbeds.

But oh, how I wanted a slice.

At thirty-two years old, I’d been diagnosed with type 2 diabetes. It scared the hell out of me, and I was determined to take perfect care of myself so I could be the best …

7 Benefits of a Surprisingly Simple Meditation Technique

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“Our way to practice is one step at a time, one breath at a time.” ~Shunryu Suzuki

I blinked my eyes, wiggled my toes, and carefully heaved my right foot out from under me. It had gone completely numb after twenty minutes of meditation. I prodded it tentatively.

“The idea is to be able to meditate wherever you are,” our teacher said, pouring out some green tea as we stretched, “to be really present in whatever it is you are doing—cutting the lawn, doing the dishes, whatever it is. To simply breathe in…and out…and just be.”

“You don’t have …

6 Lessons from a Poor Childhood That Lead to a Rich Life

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“If you want to feel rich, just count the things you have that money can’t buy.” ~Proverb

I grew up on a farm with a father that was a hired hand and a mother that took care of the elderly.

I had six siblings and was the fifth in line. We had little money, but I always felt loved, not deprived. In many ways I was a rich person.

When I was four years old I lived in a two-room house, with two bedrooms built on within the year.

We had no real kitchen (it was just a room), no …

The Secret to Happiness: 5 Tips to Feel More Grateful and Blissful

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“The secret of happiness is to count your blessings while others are adding up their troubles.” ~William Penn 

Did you know that gratitude has been scientifically proven to strengthen your immune system and make you happier and more optimistic, as well as less lonely and isolated? It’s true, and although science has just recently caught up to this fact, the Buddhists have known it for years.

On a recent trip to Bhutan, my husband and I climbed to the Bumdra monastery and camped at 11,500 feet. The air was pure and clean, and the views were spectacular. And yet when …

Happiness is Not a Destination: How to Enjoy the Journey

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“Happiness is a direction, not a place.” ~Sydney J Harris

Being happy is for most of us one of the key aims in life. But where we often go wrong is in figuring out which path to take to achieve that happiness.

My own path has been a somewhat unconventional one. In my last year at college, most of my peers were busy applying for full-time jobs with large companies, but I knew that wasn’t what I wanted to do. 

I wanted to see the world, which (long before gap years became so common) was met with disapproval by many. …

5 Tips to Stop Making Comparisons and Feeling Bad About Yourself

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“The reason we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind-the-scenes with everyone else’s highlight reel.” ~Steve Furtick

I remember one day when I was around six years old, my older brother came home from school with one of those star-shaped highlighters that had a different color on each point. I laid my eyes on it and in that moment I wanted nothing more than I wanted that highlighter.

It didn’t matter that as a six year old, I had less use for it than paper shoes in rainy weather; I just simply had to have it.

Being the …

Knowing Better and Doing Better: How Are You Fortunate?

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“Give thanks for a little and you will find a lot.” ~Hausa Proverb

Gratitude, the level of gratitude that one has, varies greatly by person. You have those that are grateful for every single thing in their lives, and those that know what the word means on paper yet never practice it in their own lives.

Then you have so many others (like myself), I call them the “in-betweeners.” We are grateful for so much but often forget this because life takes over, or so many other things are going on at once that you barely have five minutes to …

The Blessings in Disguise We Don’t Realize We’ve Received

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“The unthankful heart discovers no mercies; but the thankful heart will find, in every hour, some heavenly blessings” ~Henry Ward Beecher

I’m a calm person by nature, but like everybody else, there are a few things that get my blood, at the very least, simmering. One of them used to be inconveniences.

Our daily lives are filled with delays, missed opportunities, setbacks, and outright nuisances. It happens to us all.

Missing a bus and being late for work. Being locked out of the house for four hours when you have an urgent exam to prepare for, with all your notes …

How We Appreciate Life More When We Stop Making Assumptions

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“Joy is what happens to us when we allow ourselves to recognize how good things really are.” ~Marianne Williamson

Our 12th floor apartment overlooks Cape Town’s city bowl and harbor. The view is such that even on overcast days I’m drawn to the window each morning to breathe it in.

There’s a sense of being both a part of the world and entirely removed from it when you’re that high up.

It’s how I move through my life too; I’m either immersed in it or off on my own. This contrary nature is not without its challenges, especially …

How to Turn Pain to Joy: 11 Tips for a Powerful Gratitude Journal

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“Give thanks for a little and you will find a lot” ~Hausa Proverb

In my early, dark days of first acquiring a disability, I didn’t feel I had an awful lot to be thankful for.

It was like I had spent my whole life getting to the point where I had a thriving holistic therapy practice I loved, an amazing social life with great friends, and my beautiful dog, who I would regularly take into the country for long walks and my adrenaline pumping exercise routine.

Life was perfect. I had so much to be grateful for, but then it …

Appreciate or Change the Game Instead of Blaming It

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“Have respect for yourself, and patience and compassion. With these, you can handle anything.” ~Jack Kornfield

Imagine these three scenarios:

Scenario 1: You wake up in the middle of the night and your baby is crying. You feel annoyed that you have to wake up in the middle of your sleep.

Scenario 2: Your goal is to finish your first marathon, so you have to practice consistently. However, you don’t feel like exercising today. It’s raining and you’d like to watch television instead.

Scenario 3: You hate your job. You snap at your boss and you procrastinate on the work …

Now is the Time to Appreciate the People Who Have Helped You

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“No duty is more urgent than that of returning thanks.” -James Allen

Recently, my mom told me that my beloved piano teacher had passed on. She had reached a high age and died peacefully in her sleep. This news, delivered to me via Facebook, hit me harder than I could have prepared myself for.

Sitting there in front of my computer, I remembered the circumstances of my meeting her. Originally, it was because my sister wanted to learn how to play piano.

It was by pure chance that I decided to go with her for her first lesson and I …

50 Ways to Show Gratitude for the People in Your Life

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“Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it.” –William Arthur Ward

The holiday season generally brings us closer to people. Sometimes that closeness reminds us how much we love each other. Sometimes it reminds us that we drive each other crazy, as family often does.

At the heart of it, Thanksgiving in particular calls us to see people with the deepest appreciation for the gifts they’ve given us. Some gifts are more immediately obvious than others—the type that come with praise, affection, and genuine esteem.

Others push us, stretch us, test us, and …

The Joy and Peace That Gratitude Brings

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“Gratitude is the memory of the heart.”  -Jean Baptiste Massieu

Several months ago I was invited by the man I was newly seeing to come to one of his meditation classes. He’d been going through an incredibly tumultuous and painful time in his personal life; he realized that his family unit, which he had always seen as perfect, was human and flawed. That seemed to break something in his spirit.

He turned to meditation as a source of re-centering himself. In addition to the deep breathing, one of the cornerstones of meditation practice is gratitude—finding at least one thing every …

The Days Will Run Out

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“If we are not fully ourselves, truly in the present moment, we miss everything.” ~Thich Nhat Hanh

I heard this story recently while listening to a favorite radio show of mine. It was about this homeless man who was detailing some of his experience with homelessness.

He told stories of sleeping outside in the rain and waiting for hours to get into an overcrowded shelter. He even told a story about another homeless man, who could speak no English, who told him about how he had spent a sleepless night in a trash compactor because he felt safer and was …